I have read your book, which I found excellent and I have read many of your articles online and in The Mother magazine. My question is not really about my children’s behaviour, but my own. I find I am incredibly short tempered and often malicious.
I never hold a grudge and my anger is short lived but in in a few seconds I can do much damage. I feel the anger build inside me and then I release it by being nasty, then I no longer feel angry. Then I build bridges, which is all I am able to do at that point.
I wish I could do something to alleviate my suffering and that of my family. I feel we are all living quite unhappily these days. I hope you are able to help.
With Warmest Regards, Emma.
Your courage and self awareness is inspiring and will take you far. There is a lot you can do to stop obeying your own anger producing thoughts.
I would recommend that you book yourself phone sessions with me:
http://naomialdort.com/guidance.html. As a preparation, read Byron Katie’s book, Loving What Is, and write down the thoughts that induce your anger. For example “She should not scream,” “He should clean up his toys,” “ She shouldn’t bug her sister,” “He should listen to me,” “She should go to sleep,” etc. Bring your list of stories and thoughts to the session to investigate and uncover your true kind and loving self. Thoughts that produce anger cannot be true. Discovering what is true will release their hold over you.
With care, Naomi Alodrt www.AuthenticParent.com