“Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina.”

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By Brian Leaf

 

This evening, as my three-year-old sat on the potty for a poop, we had the following chat:

 

Benji: “Why doesn’t Mama have a penis?”

 

Me: (ala Schwarzenegger in Kindergarten Cop): “Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina.”

 

Benji: (very pensive)

 

Me: (I figure it might be helpful to review, so I ask) “What about Uncle Larry, is he a boy or a girl?”

 

Benji: (thinks for a moment and says) “Boy.”

 

Me: “Right, and he has a penis. What about Grandpa, boy or girl?”

 

Benji: “Girl.”

 

Me: “No, he’s a boy. He has a penis.” (I decide to loop back to Benji’s original question, so I ask) “So what about Mama, boy or girl?”

 

Benji: “Girl.” (Benji smiles, excited he got it right, and adds) “So I will go call her a vagina!”

 

Me: (very nervous, waving my hands) “No, no, no, don’t call her a vagina. She has a vagina, so she’s called a girl.”

 

Thankfully, I think he got it. Close call.

 

 

Brian Leaf

About Brian Leaf

 

Brian Leaf is author of the yoga memoir, Misadventures of a Garden State Yogi: My Humble Quest to Heal My Colitis, Calm My ADD, and Find the Key to Happiness. You can find him online at www.misadventures-of-a-yogi.com.