About two years ago our infant son passed away. My two older children were clearly affected. My son has autism and found his brother in the crib already gone. My daughter has since been paranoid about not having me around. At first, that meant coming downstairs every five minutes to make sure we were still there. It then spilled over to checking on us even from another room. Lately though, I was wondering why she is still doing this. We had another baby who is now four-months-old. Our son, Daniel, died at six-months-old. Things are clearly stressful in the house right now. My daughter never stopped this constant need to check on us, but lately it has been picking up again. Is there anything we can do, other than to keep reassuring her and sending her back to bed? Thanks so much for your help.
You didn’t say how old your daughter is, but it is entirely possible that once your new baby passes the six-month mark and is still OK, she will stop being so afraid. In the meantime, why don’t you just let her sleep with you or at least in your room? The more support and reassurance kids get when they really need it, the less they will need it later. For now, try just cocooning her for as long as she needs it. Eventually she will want to stay in her own room, on her own time.