make mothering.com your
home page
 discuss | experts | activism | news | book reviews | peggy's kitchen | poems | shopping guide
  current issue
pregnancy & birth | new baby | growing child | body & soul
 

editorial columns

family tools

community features


SUBSCRIBE TO THE FREE MOTHERING NEWSLETTER

subscribe
remove

growing child
discipline

Spare The Rod

A pacifist looks at punishment

Christian parents are often confused about the issue of corporal punishment, believing that they must spank their child in order to be godly parents. They take literally the phrase, "Spare the rod and spoil the child." Some religious teachers reinforce this notion by quoting scriptures out of context. Among the verses they cite: "Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him" (Proverbs 22:15); "He who spares the rod, hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him" (Proverbs 13:24); and "Do not withhold discipline from a child; punish him with the rod, and save his soul from death" (Proverbs 29:15).

At first reading, these passages might seem to support spanking. But this is not the only way to interpret them. The term rod is used throughout the Bible in connection with the shepherd’s staff: "Your rod and your staff, they comfort me" (Psalms 23:4). The shepherd’s staff is, in fact, used to guide wandering sheep along the right path, not to hit sheep who stray. So a compassionate reader could interpret the Bible as saying that parents must lead and guide their children but not harm them. This teaching is developed beautifully in the book A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23, by Philip Keller.

Finally, note that references to the "rod" are found primarily in the Old Testament. In the New Testament, Christ preaches compassion, love, and understanding, as does Paul. We would hope that all parents, hearing teachers warn about sparing the rod will remember Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians: "Shall I come to you with a rod, or in love and the spirit of gentleness?"


Featured Product
Find Your Moby Wrap
Offering the widest selection of colors and styles of wrap-style baby carriers.

BabyLegs
Ilumina Organics
Red Rocks Magazines

current issue | article index | about us | advertising | submission guidelines | calendar | books | back issues | employment