Past Questions

I stopped vaccinating my son because I believe he had a severe rash due to a vaccine. I have done some further research and I am strongly opposed to any more vaccinations, even for any child I may have in the future. I am concerned for the possibility of child protective services coming to my door and trying to take my son. Do they have the power to take my children and force vaccination? Furthermore, the last pediatrician I went to refused to treat my son because I did not want to continue vaccinating. Can a practitioner force vaccination on my family or report me to child protective services for declining vaccines?

I have been reading about elderberry's use in preventing and treating the flu - swine and seasonal both. I am strongly considering making some elderberry syrup and taking it regularly as a preventative measure. Something I have been wondering about particularly is whether prevention - either through natural methods or through vaccines - causes us to lose the benefit of gaining immunity to an illness. Do we have to actually catch the flu to build up immunity to it? Is being exposed to the flu while taking natural supplements to prevent catching it going to do anything in building up an immunity? Is it even important to build up immunity to the flu since the type changes each year? I have heard talk of swine flu becoming stronger and more resistant in the future and therefore it may be of some benefit to have built up some immunity... so can this be done while also trying to prevent oneself from catching the actual illness? Thank you, Erin Lewis

My oldest daughter will be three-years-old in November and is showing a huge interest in learning to read and write. So I bought a bunch of curriculum to work on, knowing I would need to take it slow. Is she really too young to be taught? We plan on homeschooling our children for all of their school years. I just don't want to start too young, and overwhelm her. What do you recommend?

I am in the 13th week of my first pregnancy and completely divided about taking the flu shot and the H1N1 flu shot this season. My husband recently contracted the flu while on a trip out of the city(we don't know which since it was quite an emergency and he had to start on tamiflu even before getting the blood test). It has been 6 days now since he got high fever. but with Tamiflu he was okay in about 2 days (he completed his 5-day course). So one can say I have been exposed, but I have been taking very high precautions- including washing hands, being in separate rooms, increasing my intake of Vit C, garlic etc, gargling. I am also quite a nutrition freak and am generally above average in eating healthy (self-asessment). I do have a mild sore throat but nothing much to talk about. Yet the danger of contracting the flu looms high and given the way my husband's fever shot up in a matter of an hour, the prospect of being in that situation scares me no end. What do you advice?

To be brief, my marriage is coming to an end. Several days ago an attorney friend came over to discuss what we will encounter regarding several issues my husband has with me parenting, including the fact that our three (and a quarter) year old son still breastfeeds and that if he awakens at night and I go to comfort him, I often end up cosleeping. The attorney stated that the court would advise me that this "behavior" must end; I call it attachment parenting and think it is a positive connection. Have you encountered this issue and dealt with the courts? Do you have any advice or resources for me to access?

My two-year-old had almost completely weaned himself a few months ago. He only nursed first thing in the early morning before waking up (he usually comes to the family bed half way through the night). He does have a habit of wanting to "lay on the ba-bas" or hold one and insists on skin-to-skin contact. Then I got laid off from work and he began nursing at nap time. Over the holidays both my husband and my mother suggested I put a stop to him lying on or holding the breast and it completely back-fired. Now he asks/demands to nurse every two to four hours and will hold on to one saying he "doesn't want it to fly away." I set a limit of nursing just at nap time and bedtime, but I'm not sure if he will re-wean himself. And, I'd really like to resolve his apparent fear that they are going away or somehow find a way for him to console himself with something other than the breasts.

I am a new mommy to a four-month-old daughter. I wonder if spending time with my daughter is enough. I work from home and am with her all day. She cosleeps, slings, and I carry her as often as possible. Lately, she has been spending time with a toy, which she appears to enjoy as she is beginning to explore, or she may sit with me while I type and she tears up paper. I feel guilty watching her play while I work. Even though she and I are together, I wonder if I am giving her enough focused time. I can honestly say, because I run a home-based business, I am able to get more work done now that she is spending time occupied with her toy, but I don't want to get into the habit of occupying my daughter as a substitute for fulfilling her needs. I also don't want my insecurity to get in the way of letting her grow and explore. How do I know if she needs more of my focused attention? How do I know if she is content and I should just relax and let her be?

Dear Naomi,

I have read your book, and some articles since my son was born (2.5yo) and found it an inspiration, guide and food for deep thought, as well as a road to The Work - which has had a big impact - thank you so very much. I have many questions, but the main one at present is that my partner feels he has to compensate for me being 'nice to our son', playing lots with him or letting our son decide where to walk, etc. I try to explain where I am coming from and that we have a choice about how we act and behave and love our children but I am not good with words/explanations - particularly spoken. It is explainable but it also just FEELS good. His main concern is that giving such freedom will result in a tyrant/serious criminal (our DS also has boundaries as well of course). But does freedom create tyrants in the long run, or just people who know their own mind? Hope this makes sense and is a relevant query.

Hello, My baby is 4 months old and will only sleep in his swing. It is not swinging while he is in it. It started when he became colicky and would not sleep anywhere else. I have it set up in a way with support so that it cannot move and he cannot fall out yet. My main concern is that is will have a negative impact on his developing spine. I have tried to transition to a crib and he just wakes up and screams. I am not comfortable with co-sleeping because he always ends up right on my breast and I am worried about him not getting enough air. Any advice would be helpful!

Thank you,
Worried Mother

I have a four-and-a-half-year-old attachment parented daughter who sometimes, when frustrated, will tell her friends "you're not my friend" or "I hate you." I don't care for this kind of talk, but feel that it's fairly normal behavior for a four-year-old. What makes matters worse is a close friend who is absolutely appalled by these phrases and tells my daughter and me that she won't have any friends if she talks to them like that, and always asks me "where did she learn that?!" Is my daughter's behavior normal? What should I do when she says these things? How should I handle my judgmental friend?

I have co-slept and night nursed both my children until they were over 2 years old. I am 6 months pregnant with our third child. My second child has 'bottle mouth' and will have his four top front teeth extracted under general anaesthetic at 34 months old. (He has never had a bottle and rarely drinks sugary drinks.) I am appalled that I let this happen to his teeth and whilst I have enjoyed and continue to enjoy being an 'attached parent', I regret immensely not getting him into his own crib and off the breast at night in the first year of his life. I had no idea that such acute tooth decay was a possible result of prolonged and frequent night-nursing. Whilst this did not occur to my first child I don't want to take the risk of this happening to my third baby. Whatever benefits my children may have gained from sharing my bed at night I can't possibly believe they outweigh the disadvantages of a general anaesthetic, surgical intervention, hospitalisation and living without incisors for four years or so. What is your view on this and any advice about how I and other mothers could avoid this situation in the future?

My general practitioner, bless his heart, is trying to convince me that sleeping with my five-month-old son is dangerous and increases the risk of SIDS. Although I have no intention of changing our sleeping arrangement, I would like to have some references to give him the next time we meet. His reference comes from what he claims to be the most recent study, which, apparently, was sent to physicians by the surgeon general. I'm in Canada, which may or may not be relevant as I'm not sure where the study took place.