Mothering › Child Articles

The Benefits of Ignoring Children (Sometimes)

    When I first became a mother I was always "there."  You know.  Answering every question.  Watching every special moment.  Paying attention so as not to "miss out" or "harm their self esteem."  Of course as time went on and I added more and more children to the mix, this became impossible both because of time and a desire to maintain my sanity.   One day I realized that my children expected to be listened to all the time.  I realized that they felt no shame interrupting a conversation that other people were having to announce that they were wearing socks.... read more

10 Great Ways to Be An Unhappy Mom

By: Beth Berry Over the years, I have pinpointed a few behaviors that — though widely accepted and even promoted by popular culture — simply don’t serve me. Changing these behaviors is a process and one that requires both a willingness to take personal responsibility for our choices and a continuous countercultural commitment to creating our lives by a truer, though “less convenient” set of standards. However inconvenient, these subtle shifts sure have made for better living in my experience — that is, once I sorted through the... read more

Raising a Child Who Wants to Behave: Dare Not to Discipline

Thank you to Dr. Laura Markham and Perigree Books for sharing this exclusive excerpt of Dr. Markham's new book Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting.   How to Set Empathic Limits Setting limits is an essential part of parenting. Limits keep our children safe and healthy and support them in learning social norms so that they can function happily in society. And if we set limits empathically, kids are more likely to internalize the ability to set limits for themselves, which is otherwise known as self-discipline.   How are you... read more

The Trouble with Time-Out

So there you are one afternoon, at the end of your rope with an out-of-control three-year-old. You know you won’t spank him, and you have become mindful of avoiding shame-based measures, so what’s left? Is “Time Out” the answer? At risk of bringing on the wrath of parents everywhere, my answer is no.   Time-outs were conceived as a more humane alternative to spanking, but the problem is, they land a blow to the brain and psyche rather than to the bottom. Right at the moment when the child is overwhelmed by a flood of emotions he cannot manage, and he most needs the... read more

Happily Mediocre - Challenging the Goal of Greatness

By Beth Berry     Among my favorite things about living abroad are the unexpected encounters and rich relationships we’ve formed with people from all walks of life and corners of the planet. One such experience stands out as particularly interesting... Some months ago, I met a man from England at our favorite hole-in-the-wall wine bar down the street from our house. He, a chatty guy in his late 40s, and I, excited to be out without kids and sharing a table with jovial strangers from six countries, enjoyed a lively conversation on subjects from healthcare... read more

Books For and About Strong Girls

I have three little girls five years old and younger, and they love princesses.  I don’t think there has been a single day over the last two years that at least one person in our house hasn’t been wearing a tiara and pearls.  We have it all -- the dresses, the boas, and the books.  Oh the books!   I know little tot princess culture is a hot topic of sorts, with some people hating everything about it and other people thinking it is a harmless phase that many little girls go through.   I guess you could say I’m kind of in the middle.  I don’t see any problem... read more

Mom Guilt - You Are Hereby Pardoned

By Beth Berry     Pop quiz: What do the following have in common? Disposable diapers. Food your baby sucks from a bag. That empty threat you made that got him back in his carseat. The soccer tournament you missed when you were home puking. The movie they watched while you laid in bed and did nothing. The fact that what's-her-face brought handmade, gluten-free, agave-sweetened, almond-flour cupcakes with raisins she dried from grapes grown by her guru and all you could manage was a jumbo box of cheddar bunnies. You guessed it! Guilt. And not... read more

Three Wise Women - An Interview With Grown Hippie Mamas

By Beth Berry     Reposted from my blog, Revolution from Home.    Recently, I had the honor of spending a day with my new friend Barbara and several of her girlfriends, all self-proclaimed hippies who met in Colorado in their 20s and who have managed to remain “thick friends” through the years.   Barbara (first in the lineup) lives part-time in Colorado and part-time here in Tulum. She and her husband have an off-grid, solar powered home in the jungle community my husband manages. Barbara is a gem. She and I hit it off from day one, swapping stories... read more

Raising a Sensitive Son

  While I sat in my comfy chair writing last week’s post as my little boy slept and my older son was trying to fall asleep, Everest stumbled out of bed to tell me he felt scared. This was hardly a new communication; he’s felt scared more nights than I can count since he turned five (he’s now eight). But because I happened to be writing about teaching your kids how to respond to fear, I decided to apply the lesson in the moment: “Everest, do you remember how we’ve been talking to Asher about his Monkey Brain and how he can boss it back? Well, let’s see if you... read more

When You Feel Trapped By Motherhood

  By Sheryl Paul, M.A.   It’s Sunday afternoon. I’m lying down with my 3 year old to see if he’ll take a much-needed nap and the title of one of Pema Chodron’s books pops into my mind: No Escape. (The full title is The Wisdom of No Escape.) This immediately makes sense, as I’ve been having visions lately of another life, another city, another lifestyle – one that includes all of my family members but is somehow easier. I know that my psyche is trying to escape a challenging stage of parenting, one in which my three year old is falling apart inside as he... read more

Mothering › Child Articles