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Let's do another embarrassing kid's thread:

6K views 111 replies 77 participants last post by  alexsam 
#1 ·
The other night Eli and I were sitting at the computer and Loo was watching TV.
During a commerical she jumped up and said to us "Hey watch this....."
We turned around and all in one motion, Lucia juts her hip to the side, whips down her britches, smacks a bare bun and belts out "Who let the dogs out."
At first we were shocked. Just shocked.
Then Eli and I were double over unable to stop laughing.
In between gasping for air I told her never to do that again. EVER. (But, If it makes your parents laugh that hard....it's not going to end with a reprimand.)
The next day we asked my Mom to watch Loo. While we're dropping her off, I told her about the "Who let the dogs out" story. She's laughing about it and I'm getting ready to go, when Loo needs to go to the bathroom.
I took her in and after she was done, I decided I should go too before I hit the road.
When it's my turn, down come my pants and I'm ready to postition my buns on the toilet when Loo opens her mouth and PELTS at the top of her lungs "WHO LET THE STINKY DOGS OUT?"
What?!
I was super embarressed and decided the best way to handle it was to pretend it just didn't happen, once I leave the room.
I turned to Loo and hiss "Loo, Grandma goes to church and she does not like that kind of talk, so be quiet! Then I nonchalantly hicked up my britches and went to leave the bathroom......
but there's Mom, my step dad and my sister....
right outside the bathroom door- they're hanging up a planter over the stairs..
They heard the whole thing.
Now everyone knows how I really roll.
Stinky style.

Your turn.
 
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#102 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by maliceinwonderland View Post
Dd and I were walking home from the store yesterday, and we passed this woman with a little girl and a baby in the stroller. Both the mom and little girl were chubby. The baby was in one of those carseats snapped onto the stroller, so once we walked by them I looked over my shoulder to get a peak at the baby and I said to dd "Oooh, what a sweet baby, he's adorable and chunky" and dd says "I'm not surprised
"

Her timing was perfect and shocking and I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing, but at the same time I was astounded she could be so evil! I'm not even thin, haven't been thin for over two years.
I see from your picture that your daughter is in pageants or something. And she is a beautiful little girl. But I hope you explained to her why that kind of comment is wrong and how hurtful it can be to the other person. You had to bite your tongue to keep from laughing but I imagine this mother had to bite her tongue to keep from crying and possibly had to explain to her little girl that some people are obviously not to be taught to be so hurtful. Looking at the picture your little girl is not a 2 or 3 year old. She is old enough to learn not to comment on people's weight.
 
#103 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Heavenly View Post
I see from your picture that your daughter is in pageants or something. And she is a beautiful little girl. But I hope you explained to her why that kind of comment is wrong and how hurtful it can be to the other person. You had to bite your tongue to keep from laughing but I imagine this mother had to bite her tongue to keep from crying and possibly had to explain to her little girl that some people are obviously not to be taught to be so hurtful. Looking at the picture your little girl is not a 2 or 3 year old. She is old enough to learn not to comment on people's weight.
They weren't in earshot, or I would have turned around and apologized to the woman right there.

The reason it was so shocking is that it was completely out of character. I would have never expected or even fathomed something like that coming out of dd's mouth. And of course I told her it wasn't appropriate..yeesh.
 
#104 ·
My daughter turned 2 in March. In the last month, she's asked a woman who was a stranger if she had a uterus. A couple weeks later, she told me that another woman at a party had a big belly like mine so she was growing a baby too. (However, it was just a larger non-pg woman). I don't think the woman understood what DD said since we were across the room. Since then, I've taught DD that not everyone with a big belly is growing a baby. She now understands this. However, teaching her to ask certain questions only in public is proving much more challenging.

I now realize that asking women about their uterus is far less embarassing than asking them about the baby they're growing when they're not!

My DS has a speech delay but an above average vocabulary. Luckily, no one could ever understand the embarrassing things he said. DD's speech is average for her age in pronounciation, but above in vocabulary, so I just hope others don't know what he's saying.
 
#105 ·
This one happened to a friend of mine. She was leaving work with her kids (they have a daycare on-site), and there happened to be a protest outside about the city's treatment of blacks. They walked through the protest to the crosswalk and her son (a very fair-haired blue-eyed boy) raises his hand in a heil Hitler way and says "Stop! It's only ok with the white man!"

He was talking about crossing the street only when the white neon guy on the crosswalk sign was showing. My friend nearly died - she worked PR for the city at the time!
 
#106 ·
These are hilarious.


The only stories like this I can think of right now are:

DS and I were eating lunch at a restaurant and there was a bald man seated in the booth right behind us. DS said, loudly, "Mommy, why doesn't that man have any hair?"


DS and I were in the doctor's office waiting room and a Latino UPS guy came to deliver a package. DS said, "Mommy, what is that brown man doing?" I ignored the "brown" part for the moment and just said, "The man is delivering a package." A few seconds later DS pointed at another patient who was waiting and said, "What is that green man doing?" and it finally dawned on me that he was talking about people's clothing colors, not their skin.
 
#107 ·
This one's my sister's (but I was there, so I get to post it)...When my brother-in-law was in residency, my niece was a toddler and had a hard time remembering him sometimes between his long times away. The best was when we were in an elevator and she turned to a man who got in on the first floor with us and says, "Are you my dad?"
The guy responds, "Well, I don't know. I don't think so!"
My sister was mortified and I was laughing hysterically and my poor niece was totally confused.
It was a long ride up!
 
#108 ·
My niece had just gotten back from her first day at camp. My very religious and consertative parents, my sister, nieces, and I were all watching a children's movie together. A scene with a beautiful woman came on and my niece (five or six at the time) shouts out, "Ooooh! I'd like to lick her pu$$y!" There was just stunned silence in the room. Finally my sister saysm "Ummm...what did you say?" My niece happily repeats it. I just about died laughing. Obviously she'd picked that up at camp that day and had no idea what it meant. Having British friends she only knew pussy to mean cat.
 
#109 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by KnitLady View Post
My niece had just gotten back from her first day at camp. My very religious and consertative parents, my sister, nieces, and I were all watching a children's movie together. A scene with a beautiful woman came on and my niece (five or six at the time) shouts out, "Ooooh! I'd like to lick her pu$$y!" There was just stunned silence in the room. Finally my sister saysm "Ummm...what did you say?" My niece happily repeats it. I just about died laughing. Obviously she'd picked that up at camp that day and had no idea what it meant. Having British friends she only knew pussy to mean cat.
That is seriously disturbing that a 5 year old would be hearing that at camp.
:
 
#110 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by KnitLady View Post
My niece had just gotten back from her first day at camp. My very religious and consertative parents, my sister, nieces, and I were all watching a children's movie together. A scene with a beautiful woman came on and my niece (five or six at the time) shouts out, "Ooooh! I'd like to lick her pu$$y!" There was just stunned silence in the room. Finally my sister saysm "Ummm...what did you say?" My niece happily repeats it. I just about died laughing. Obviously she'd picked that up at camp that day and had no idea what it meant. Having British friends she only knew pussy to mean cat.
: omg I would have died laughing although I do have to agree with Heavenly. I would so not be happy to have my young'un come back from a camp spewing stuff like that. I mean it sounds to me like she probably got a good earful. She not only repeated it, she spit it out at a, well, pretty accurate time, even if she didn't understand what it actually meant.
 
#111 ·
Oh yeah, we were all very, very shocked to say the least. In fact it really made me wonder about the situation of whatever child she heard it from. My sister was pretty upset that she heard something so vulgar.

Thankfully my sister had the wisdom to not make a big deal of it with my niece. She just told her that it wasn't a nice thing to say and my niece has never said it again.
 
#112 ·
When my son was about 2 (close to 3) I had a rash of... um... minor traffic incidents with him in the car. I bumped into my husband's car backing out of the driveway, I banged the garage door, I ran over a few crubs, I bumped into a sign, etc. All in the space of a week or two. There was no damage done to the car or anything else, so I thought I would keep this quiet
.

Well, my husband took DS out and came back and told me every time he went over a speed bump, DS would shout from his carseat in the back "Oh, SH*T!" and he was wondering if I had any idea why. I had to fess up. Dang, kid!

:
 
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