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The August 'Whatever' Thread

15K views 490 replies 23 participants last post by  MarineWife 
#1 ·
Is it okay if I start the new thread? I'm new to this! We have a DS who is 8.5, a DD who is 14 months, are getting married in two weeks, and we are whatever-ing. We don't have a verbal agreement about it, but that's how it's been working out


We use FAM right now, but I think DP wants another baby more than he admits - he's not too into using bc, ever


I'd love to have another baby sometime soon - getting pregnant sometime this late fall or winter would be great!

So, I hope I can join in the conversation!
 
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#179 ·
So this weekend my dad offered me a Smirnoff and when I said no thanks he immediately said "Are you pregnant?!?"
DH was like, "Dude, she just brushed her teeth." My dad then went on to say that he had seen on my facebook that I had "liked" a page called Babywearing Safety (I found it reading the latest issue of Mothering online) and he thought that meant I was pregnant.
LOL So this makes me want to come up with subtly pregnant-sounding status updates to tease him. And then, if/when I actually do get pregnant, to make them less and less subtle until he calls wondering WTH is up.
Hee hee hee I'm evil. Anyone have any ideas?
 
#180 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by BarefootScientist View Post
So this weekend my dad offered me a Smirnoff and when I said no thanks he immediately said "Are you pregnant?!?"
DH was like, "Dude, she just brushed her teeth." My dad then went on to say that he had seen on my facebook that I had "liked" a page called Babywearing Safety (I found it reading the latest issue of Mothering online) and he thought that meant I was pregnant.
LOL So this makes me want to come up with subtly pregnant-sounding status updates to tease him. And then, if/when I actually do get pregnant, to make them less and less subtle until he calls wondering WTH is up.
Hee hee hee I'm evil. Anyone have any ideas?
Totally! Just start putting things like, "I'm sooo tired" and "I'd kill for some rocky road ice cream right now" and see when he finally can't take it anymore, lol!
 
#181 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by MommatoAandA View Post
Katrina- I lied, lol I'm on cd 30, i totally lost a day somewhere.. But we are close! http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2ab513 wondering if I am going to start AF, hence the temp dropping?
Could be O soon, too. My temp drops about a week before I O.

DH won't be home until after I see the midwife so that will be some confirmation.
 
#182 ·
Alysia- Yeah I was wondering that. Not sure. I feel exhausted. Which is weird, I am tired to the point I could nap which I never can do. I have some random symptoms of pregnancy, but I am wondering if it is my fertility getting back in the swing of things? Who knows.

I just went to CVS and answer brand PG tests has a box of 5 test strips with a cup for 15$! I bought them. HAHA
They must have caught wind of the IC's!

BFS- omg you could totally have fun with that! LMAO.
 
#183 ·
ok, first of all, i know other people have said this but march is a ways away and your baby is only one, totally normal to not be back to full fertility yet. you will be fine!! plenty of time!
Alysia, i am excited for you to tell dh too. maybe you can hide the mushy card somewhere where it will surprise him like in the medicine cabinet or something. folded into his towel? on his steering wheel?
barefootscientist, that is a great wicked idea. please report back what status messages you use for this.
what do you all think of temps 98, 97.9, 97.5 (that's back to coverline), then 97.9? wait and see what happens, i know, but is the 97.5 just a random drop? i know you can't really answer this for me. but i wish you could!!! the high temps make me so hopeful.
 
#184 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by hilary549 View Post
ok, first of all, i know other people have said this but march is a ways away and your baby is only one, totally normal to not be back to full fertility yet. you will be fine!! plenty of time!
Alysia, i am excited for you to tell dh too. maybe you can hide the mushy card somewhere where it will surprise him like in the medicine cabinet or something. folded into his towel? on his steering wheel?
barefootscientist, that is a great wicked idea. please report back what status messages you use for this.
what do you all think of temps 98, 97.9, 97.5 (that's back to coverline), then 97.9? wait and see what happens, i know, but is the 97.5 just a random drop? i know you can't really answer this for me. but i wish you could!!! the high temps make me so hopeful.
was the drop at 3 DPO? Implantation causes a dip around 5-7 DPO... Not sure if it can be as early as 3 DPO though?
 
#185 ·
hilary ~ I wouldn't worry about the 97.5 since it was at your CL. It's still above the grouping of 6 lower temps, right? With FAM, you can have lp temps at and sometimes even below your CL. It's the overall shift in temps that you are looking for. I would question it if one of those first 3 went below the CL but right on the CL is ok. NFP uses a low temp limit (LTL), which is set on the highest of your previous 6 temps, and a high temp limit (HTL), which is set 0.4 degree above the LTL. Then you are supposed to get 3 temps above the LTL with at least one going up to the HTL. If one of those first 3 temps does not get to the HTL, you wait to see if the 4th does. Then you are good. So, with those temps you've met that criteria.

Now I'm starting to chicken out on telling my dh. I think I want to wait until I see a hb again. My hpts from my pg last spring/summer looked really good, too, and I still m/ced.

I did break down and tell 6yo ds last night for a few reasons. We were watching a TV show that just happened to be about babies and getting pg and I got all mushy. He really wants a baby sibling and he wants to go with me today while I talk about it so I figured I'd better fill him in beforehand. He was so excited that he had a huge grin on his face he couldn't wipe off. He hugged me and said he was happy for me. Then he started telling me I'm not allowed to get angry or yell so that I don't lose the baby. So if his little brother starts walking toward the street, he'll yell, "Stop!" so I don't have to. He's so sweet. Oh, and then he came downstairs this morning and jumped out at me and said, "Boo!" and startled me so that I jumped. Then he got a worried look on his face (not overly worried like he thinks he's responsible for all of this) and asked if it was ok for me to be scared when pg. I told him it was fine.

Oh, one more funny thing. At one point he said it was weird that I was hatching and egg and growing a baby without all that being with a man stuff.


Oh, oh, one more funny thing not related to my ds. I had someone who actually told me that maybe I should tell my dh right away since it happened so fast after he got home. I think she was implying that he might question if the baby is his. Can you believe that?!
 
#186 ·
Hi everybody! As far as I can tell this thread is for us that does not active try to, but not do much for avoiding getting pregnant?
Then i guess this is the place for me as well.
Having 4 wonderful sons, I just don`t seem to get that feeling of being done yet. I really would love to have just one more! My husband is not very ready for another though... I stopped using my nuvaring in May, and said to him that now it`s your responsibility to avoid a new pregnancy.
And...of course, he is not doing much to avoid it.

I have the feeling that something will happen my next cycle, later in august.

It is really NOT very common to have more than the average 1,9 children here in Norway. Most people are happy with two, but the last few years it seems like there are some small changes. Child number 3 is now not so unusual.
But I have to admit that if I end up pregnant, I`m not looking forward to tell all family and friends. I guess some of them just would think I`m crazy.
Some will be happy, some will not be supportive.
But, I just wish to follow my heart..
 
#187 ·
Hi Aurora! Yep - you're in the right place! Happy Whatevering to you!

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post
hilary ~ I wouldn't worry about the 97.5 since it was at your CL. It's still above the grouping of 6 lower temps, right? With FAM, you can have lp temps at and sometimes even below your CL. It's the overall shift in temps that you are looking for. I would question it if one of those first 3 went below the CL but right on the CL is ok. NFP uses a low temp limit (LTL), which is set on the highest of your previous 6 temps, and a high temp limit (HTL), which is set 0.4 degree above the LTL. Then you are supposed to get 3 temps above the LTL with at least one going up to the HTL. If one of those first 3 temps does not get to the HTL, you wait to see if the 4th does. Then you are good. So, with those temps you've met that criteria.

Oh, oh, one more funny thing not related to my ds. I had someone who actually told me that maybe I should tell my dh right away since it happened so fast after he got home. I think she was implying that he might question if the baby is his. Can you believe that?!
Thank you SO MUCH for saying this. I'm nearly in a fit of tears b/c my temp today, ADJUSTED, is on the CL. I don't know if that counts as meeting the guideline for LTL.

This cycle is a just big wash I think. I don't know whats going on. I can't really trust sundays high temp b/c of sleep deprivation, and not enough time asleep. So I might discard it. Today my temp was 96.9 before adjusting for time, which is really NOT a post O temp. Even adjusted its right on the CL. I'm almost doubting that I o'd yet at all. Wah. I took it at 5:30 and I usually take it at 6:30. But i woke up and was feeling antsy, and couldn't fall right back asleep so I said, Whatever, I'll take it now and adjust it -- when I saw it I nearly cried.

If I didn't O yet or if I O today there's very, very little chance of conceiving. And I know that sounds so TTC and not Whatever, but I just can't help how I feel. We got DD on the first try, and this is now our 4th cycle trying. I just feel helpless.

And I can't believe someone would say that to you about telling your DH, MW! That's outrageous!!
 
#188 ·
elcome aurora! you should follow your heart wherever you are; regardless of what is normal there.

Alysia, glad you talked to someone, even if he is 6, I am sure his excitement will be contagious! He sounds very cute

Torre, saw your other post, sorry you had a bad night with Anna. I was up and down with DS between 7:30 and 11:30 also. Thankfully I didn't really have anything that urgently needed to be done. Hopefully you will have some time to do school stuff today -

Still waiting on AF, need to plug a temp into FF; it has finally dipped below my CL so :AF should really be here soon! I just want to move on to the next cycle; it isn't like I really enjoy her visits.
 
#189 ·
Carrie, our posts crossed -
I know it is rough when you think it will happen right away. sounds like you need a distraction! a good book, a craft project . . .something! I am new to the FAM lingo; I just um. started plugging temps and stuff into FF and iVillage fertility planner when we TTC'd DS. makes me think I need to go back and do some reading!
 
#190 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by AuroraPolaris View Post
Having 4 wonderful sons, I just don`t seem to get that feeling of being done yet. I really would love to have just one more! My husband is not very ready for another though... I stopped using my nuvaring in May, and said to him that now it`s your responsibility to avoid a new pregnancy.
And...of course, he is not doing much to avoid it.

Welcome. This was pretty much my situation. I have 3 boys. I don't feel done yet, but dh said he didn't want anymore. I was not using any bc and told him it was his responsibility to prevent since it was what he wanted. He obviously wasn't doing a very good job because I'm about 4w pg now.


Carrie ~ I hate to say but I don't think you can confirm O yet with those temps. For the NFP LTL (not FAM CL), all your post-O temps need to be above the line. It's only with the FAM CL that is already drawn 0.1 degree above the highest of the previous 6 temps that you can have a temp on the CL because it is still above the lower group of temps. Does that make sense? Why are your cd9 and 11 temps open circles?

Some of you had rough nights with LOs? I had an annoying night. My 19yo kept going in and out of the house. The front door creaks when it opens and closes and he slams the door so hard that it shakes the whole house. I was finally able to catch him at 2 am without having to get out of bed to tell him to stop it! Sheesh!
 
#191 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post
Carrie ~ I hate to say but I don't think you can confirm O yet with those temps. For the NFP LTL (not FAM CL), all your post-O temps need to be above the line. It's only with the FAM CL that is already drawn 0.1 degree above the highest of the previous 6 temps that you can have a temp on the CL because it is still above the lower group of temps. Does that make sense? Why are your cd9 and 11 temps open circles?
Don't feel bad, I know.

Those open circles just aren't adjusted for time. Both were about an hour late. Adjusted they would be:

CD11 - 96.9
CD9 - 96.8

The only thing is last night I slept on the couch, so that could have thrown things off. I don't know. Too many variables. I'm just going to have to wait and see what happens. I hate not feeling confident. I always have a clear and sustained thermal shift, ALWAYS. So this is new territory for me.
 
#192 ·
*hugs* I'm sorry Carrie. That's a sucky place to be in. Last month my 'fertile' period flew by before I even realized what was happening, and it really sucks looking back after and going 'oh, well I guess this month is a wash'. Not even having hope really sucks.

I'm charting only CF right now, and I thought it might have started to dry up (I'm on CD14, so a bit early, but nto much), but this morning there was really really stretchy fluid when I went to the bathroom. Unfortunately (fortunately) we dtd last night, and since I just saw it, but didn't touch it, I don't know if it was CF, or other. I'm hoping I o soon, since I'm working evenings all week, and not so sure I'm going to be in the mood to dtd, and I won't force it. Today would be wonderful
lol

Either way, DH seems VERY excited all of a sudden. In the past few days, he's referred to/asked me about making a baby probably half a dozen times. It's so cute. And then this morning, he was staring at me, and I told him he was making me feel like a ticking time bomb.
 
#193 ·
Hm...My post disappeared. I could have sworn it went through. Anyway...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes View Post
Those open circles just aren't adjusted for time. Both were about an hour late. Adjusted they would be:

CD11 - 96.9
CD9 - 96.8
If that's the case, your CL would 97.1 and your LTL would be 97.0 so you are still good for O on cd14.
 
#195 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post
Hm...My post disappeared. I could have sworn it went through. Anyway...

If that's the case, your CL would 97.1 and your LTL would be 97.0 so you are still good for O on cd14.

Have I ever told you how much I love you!!!


Thank you!!!
 
#197 ·
Hi ladies.... you all have been busy today.

after much thought and a bad night with Anna last night, I have decided to put a hold on whatevering. I am going to go back on the pill until we figure everything out. I just have too much on my plate right now, to complicate things. Its hard because I truly do want a baby, but it just seems to make no sense for the kids and myself at this time.

You guys are awesome and I will be lurking and saying hi..
Goodluck to you all...
 
#198 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by MommatoAandA View Post
Hi ladies.... you all have been busy today.

after much thought and a bad night with Anna last night, I have decided to put a hold on whatevering. I am going to go back on the pill until we figure everything out. I just have too much on my plate right now, to complicate things. Its hard because I truly do want a baby, but it just seems to make no sense for the kids and myself at this time.

You guys are awesome and I will be lurking and saying hi..
Goodluck to you all...
Aww, mama! You'll be missed!!
It sounds like you are making this decision in the best interest of everyone involved. Take care of yourself, ok? I know this is so tough for you! Definitely hang out here as long as you want.

AFM - I'm starting to doubt that I've O'ed.
 
#200 ·
MW-If it were me, I think I'd tell dh. I mean, he could possibly worry more then, since he wasn't home, but at least he'd know "if" something were to happen. Otherwise then you have to explain why you were upset etc, kwim?
My ds 5.5 asks about the baby every once in awhile. It's funny, he brings it up at the strangest times too. He'll just say he wants another baby, and do I remember the one who went to heaven. There are days I really want another-which is why I'm on this board-and then other times the thought stresses me out. I'm healing.

On that note-more ewcf today. And I'm breaking out, so I think O is around the corner. I hate breaking out around O and Af-what's with that? I breakout some on my shoulders too, which is very annoying. I have yet to figure out a way to stop this. Is there something natural I can take to help?
Cervix is high and soft, soft, soft. I can never judge opening, only position and firmness.
 
#201 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by bbrandonsmom View Post
On that note-more ewcf today. And I'm breaking out, so I think O is around the corner. I hate breaking out around O and Af-what's with that? I breakout some on my shoulders too, which is very annoying. I have yet to figure out a way to stop this. Is there something natural I can take to help?
Cervix is high and soft, soft, soft. I can never judge opening, only position and firmness.
I can't really judge openness either, mine is always slightly open. I do check CP but I don't record it. Maybe I should/will. As for breakouts, the same thing happens to me. I usually break out on my chin right before AF. It's hormonal, so very little can be done to stop it. It happens to pretty much most women. I see so many women in for facials the week before their period, it's insane.

MW - thanks. I needed that!
 
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