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November Low Income Mummas Support Thread

36K views 1K replies 64 participants last post by  Aura_Kitten 
#1 ·
I know it's a bit early, but I thought I would start this thread. (Mostly because if I don't force myself to start the thread, I won't post at all, and I really need the support...)

On a previous support thread, someone called life below the poverty line "bone-grindingly hard". That phrase is so perfect. I feel like I'm already doing all I can in the 24 hours I have every day, and it's still. not. enough. I work 40+ hours per week in an office. You'd think I'd make enough money to live on, but just trying to keep my 4 children fed, clothed, healthy, sheltered and warm takes just about everything I make, and then when you add school supplies, birthdays, Christmas, et cetera, and I just want to give up and cry.

This year, it's even worse. Nearly all of our quilts and blankets are finally giving their last gasp (they're all really old and get regular use), and winter in Montana is long and cold.

I'm so tired of not being able to provide my children with the life I want them to have. (I know they don't need ipods, mobile phones and 150 television channels, but is a warm bed too much to ask?
)

Thanks for listening to me whinge.
 
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#356 ·
Any of you potty training with cd's? I found some of those at the thrift store too.


Or need some 2T-4T boy undies? I have some unopened and some just washed and never worn. Not a ton, but a few... my middle has severe sensory issues and would not wear them.

BF'ing moms... any of you wear a Large Double Plus Bravado?????? Like this:
http://www.bravadodesigns.com/product.asp?ID=3
And in desperate need of a bra???

.
 
#358 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by justmama View Post
I really need to do a grateful post because I'm feeling sorry for myself today and I'm cranky.

1. a healthy pregnancy that allows me to work. I'm 26weeks with no problems so far. By 21w last time I was on bedrest and was already going into preterm labor and had blood pressure high enough to make me see spots and have migraines.
2. a woman I work with is giving me a high chair and a swing!!!!! I wouldn't buy them otherwise but it's nice to have stuff just given to you. I appreciate her generosity.
3. While we don't have much, we have enough to go grocery shopping on Monday and it's a good thing because we've had pancakes every meal for the last 2 days.
: But we can grocery shop on Monday with the check the stbx is givign me today!
s justmama!
And
for being able to get off the pancake diet!
 
#359 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
Any of you potty training with cd's? I found some of those at the thrift store too.


we will be - I'm slowly trying to work on PTing DD - she wears a small 2t in panties.

I really want to try to get DD back in cloth diapers/Potty trained - even with coupon shopping, diapers are costing us at minimum $10 a week {probably more like $15-20}. I'm just not sure if her CD's will hold her amount of pee - she is on a special formula, and it tends to make her really really pee a lot at a time - she soaks an entire pamper with each pee.

I may just dig them out and put her in them today to see how well they work.
 
#361 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
Any of you potty training with cd's? I found some of those at the thrift store too.

While I'd love to say yes (you have no idea how much! Actually, you probably do!
) Bella is in no way, shape, or form ready for potty learning. She's shown a few readiness signs but she just doesn't communicate well enough to quite "get it." She's trying, and she loves wearing training pants, but she's soooo not there yet.
I'm just hoping she learns a bit in the next few months. I'd forgotten how much work it can be to watch a kid and assist them because BooBah was ridiculously easy (as soon as I stopped showing her the little potty, she pulled a stepstool up to the regular toilet, sat down, and that was pretty much that
.

On the other hand..

Quote:
BF'ing moms... any of you wear a Large Double Plus Bravado?????? Like this:
http://www.bravadodesigns.com/product.asp?ID=3
And in desperate need of a bra???
I've been drooling over these for five years now.
I'm about a 38 bandsize, perhaps a little smaller when I'm not pregnant. Is that what a 'large' is?
 
#362 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
Wow... it's the 11th and so far this morning we have had:

349 Posts

6119 Views


Come on lurking mama's we don't bite!!!!

I must admit I have been lurking but often feel like I don't belong here but really there is no place for me. Technically my family is not low income but we have lost about 50% of our income, and its not like we lost 50% of our expenses when we lost that income. My dh is a writer/editor, its what he has done for the past 20 years, he has been freelancing for the past 5 year when we moved to Maine and there were no gigs for him. Even now his income is about 40K which still pays more than the average publication would pay him out here and he doesn't have to leave the house since his office is in our house.

Problem is we are almost 200K in the hole excluding our mortgage, thankfully my FIL has been helping out but that's getting old and comes with its own issues
.. sometimes I am so happy for his help and sometimes I get pissed because lately its seems once a month that help with the mortgage comes with a lecture.

Right now we are without insurance, applied for Mainecare, got turned down
:, income too high, yet can't afford coverage. I have some low level health issues that need to be dealt with but no money. I take Zyrtec for allergies which is $90 a pop but have been so broke, when I do take it I buy in increments of 5.

I fricking have a masters degree and looking for a job has been a joke, been unemployed since July.. I will start teaching a class at nights this week but the pay sucks but with unemployment ending in Dec I am not in a place to turn anything down. However what I will make is $40 less than my unemployment benefits so we are hardly getting ahead.

This past week, our car failed inspection to the tune of $900 worth of repairs, had to take the bill money to get that dealt with, thankfully dh got a check later that day for $600 for an article he actually had forgotten that he wrote. So now I am only $300 in the hole this month, selling stuff on e-bay to make the holidays happen. So far this month, I have sold $125 worth of stuff.

Clothes, why so children seem to constantly outgrow everything at times when your money is tight.. the kids are growing, I am down 30 pounds and also in need. Thankfully I have been thrifting and found some stuff but its a constant struggle.

Holidays
:, trying to figure that out.. right now I have most of dd's stuff but she is 2 so that is easy, its my almost 16 yo who is not cheap. Plus he is at his Dad's in WI so I have to buy plane tickets, his Thanksgiving ticket set me back $400 on Southwest. still need to get his Christmas ticket.

Yet in the midst of this mess that is the financial ruins of my life I am aware that I have much to be thankful for, thankfully I have been able to not spend much on groceries because my freezer had been stocked, granted next month I will need to stock up.

Anyway that's my story, out of lurkdom.. nice to let this out.

Shay
 
#363 ·
Oh... I've got little tiny girls things to send out for the holiday helper thing this year. I can't knit (it's just impossible with the kids all over the place trying to destroy anything I make
but I can send things that the girls have outgrown... Particularly because the child to whom I'd have handed things down (my niece) is, at this point, a heck of a lot bigger than Bella around the thighs... and in another two months, she'll be bigger in every direction except hieght.
It's actually really nice, though, because 90% of the 12-month sized clothing that Bella has was actually sent to me last year by a Holiday Helper, so it'll be kind of cool to pass those things on, along with the preemie & newborn sized outfits that she wore when she was teensy (no, she wasn't that early... she was just petite and very compact, as my babies tend to be).

So I guess that's something to be greatful for-- the ability to send things to others. It's nice to feel like a human being. I only wish I could knit, because it's something that I do really well that not everyone can do, you know? It'd make me so happy... I guess it'll just have to wait.
: Anyway, I'll probably squeeze some shipping money out of my family... We'll see how that goes.


Oh, something else-- The unemployment compensation thing, where I lost the password? mike called them and they actually just fixed it in the computer and put the money into his account! This means that...
Our rent check isn't going to bounce!!! YAY!! That is such a relief... two weeks of overdraw fees plus both bounced check fees (one from the landlord, one from the bank
: ) would have left us... well, up the creek without a paddle, so to speak. Anyway, that money being deposited means that we should also be able to put a little bit of oil into the tank when the next check is deposited next week.

That's two... lemme think...

Well... my hair looks really pretty today.
I suppose that's something to be greatful for.
 
#364 ·
The number 1 thing I am thankful for today is that the kids qualify for medicaid. We had a visit to the emergency clinic that their ped's office does on Sunday afternoon. This morning I was in the bedroom fixing dd's hair and we hear agonized screaming from the living room. I am guessing that ds had gone digging in the couch and for reasons I can not fathom stuck a sucker stick in his ear. When I looked in his ear shortly after I could see a hole through his ear drum. I called the nurse and they said we could bring him in either in the afternoon or wait for the morning. Later on his ear started looking like pus was coming out so in we went. Not too horrible of a wait in an almost empty waiting room, quick visit with the on call doctor and we came out with a perscription for ear drops. They are pretty much like neosporin just to keep things clean in there. The doctor even told us that if he doesn't seem to be having a problem with the ear being warm or anything to not bother with them. We are heading out to Target in just a little bit to get that filled just in case his ear gets nasty.

We don't know yet how the interview went yesterday and while I wish dh would bug them every couple minutes to know if they want to hire him rationally I know that would not help. As for the LL thing it's possible he talked up this side of the duplex as he knows dh has done work around here and honestly it's a lot nicer then the other side at the moment. If he wasn't cheap about this place he could get the other side looking nice, but he plans to tear it down in the next 5-10 years so he doesn't want to put tons of money in it. He takes care of the important stuff like water and sewage, but the patch jobs on the walls when we moved in were a joke and it obviously was not painted.

On the clothes thing. Part of the reason I didn't want to worry about them is I would not know what to get for my kids to wear in really cold weather. I've lived in the south far too long to be able to figure that out on my own. As it is now we will not be leaving FL until at least the end of November and if we do leave then it would be heading home to LA or near friends and family in the DFW area of TX. That means I'm slowly looking at cool, but not icy cold weather clothes. We also have a on and off potty training little guy who was partially ec'd from birth, but at the moment he thinks peeing on things is fun
: I had been thinking about getting him big boy undies for his birthday on the 19th, but then I get annoyed at the thought of him peeing in them. Nothing like pg hormones to make life fun. At this point I'm hoping to manage some big chunky crayons and if I'm lucky a couple coloring books for his birthday. I've been watching the thrift stores for a big Tonka truck for playing with outdoors, but until things are more sure I don't want to get any other big things.
 
#365 ·
tonight i am going to a benefit for one of my oldest friends. he is a single dad, truely single his kids' mom just died. and he is battling cancer.

i am grateful that i have him as a friend, grateful he doesnt have to pay for healthcare with cash when he gets it, he can pay afterwards, i am grateful that our friends (mostly poor folx and punkrockers) have set this up for him.

i am grateful for my own health despite battling the flu the last two weeks generally i am healthy.
 
#366 ·
My first time posting here

I'm apprehensive about the upcoming holidays.. we have so many family members who we exchange gifts with and I'm pulling my hair out trying to figure out what to get everyone and stay within our meager budget.
I plan to do a lot of baking

We're planning our first homebirth and we have yet to buy all of our supplies..
and I am so stressed out from school right now.

On the bright side, it looks like we may qualify for some free bed funds through the hospital that will really cut our medical bills down quite a bit. It's just going to take a lot of paperwork, but I'm going to get moving on that this week.

But I am grateful that we are all healthy right now and that I'm nearing the end of this semester (and that much closer to my maternity break from school
)
 
#368 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by eilonwy View Post
That's two... lemme think...

Well... my hair looks really pretty today.
I suppose that's something to be greatful for.

That's absolutely something to be grateful for!

Welcome, lurkers and new posters! I love the little community we have created here in this thread.

Ok, today was a pretty good day. Nothing major, just peaceful and gorgeous weather. So, here are my 3 things I'm grateful for:
- the weather- cooler weather always puts me in a better, more hopeful mood
- only 4 weeks of school left (and many essays, but that's another story...)
- um....can I say the cute guy again...cause he's really cheering me up lately (no, nothing has happened, but it's just that fluttery feeling
 
#369 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by eilonwy View Post
I've been drooling over these for five years now.
I'm about a 38 bandsize, perhaps a little smaller when I'm not pregnant. Is that what a 'large' is?

Did you go through their way of measuring? I did and then found it was a bit too tight.
 
#370 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by mama2babybeans View Post
My first time posting here

I'm apprehensive about the upcoming holidays.. we have so many family members who we exchange gifts with and I'm pulling my hair out trying to figure out what to get everyone and stay within our meager budget.
I plan to do a lot of baking

We're planning our first homebirth and we have yet to buy all of our supplies..
and I am so stressed out from school right now.

On the bright side, it looks like we may qualify for some free bed funds through the hospital that will really cut our medical bills down quite a bit. It's just going to take a lot of paperwork, but I'm going to get moving on that this week.

But I am grateful that we are all healthy right now and that I'm nearing the end of this semester (and that much closer to my maternity break from school
)

Welcome.

Remember your family comes FIRST during th holidays. The rest will just have to live with it!
 
#371 ·
Welcome mama2babybeans!

If you have an MW, can you get a discount on the birth kit?
If not, you don't really need anything for a homebirth... I know... I had a UC and my birth stuff arrived 2 days after my DS!
We did fine.

Oh, and if you PM me your address I'll send you 2 large--I think plastic-backed sheets--I didn't need after all. I also have hydrogen peroxide and maybe some other things... Oh yeah, a peri bottle.
 
#372 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by ian'smommaya View Post
tonight i am going to a benefit for one of my oldest friends. he is a single dad, truely single his kids' mom just died. and he is battling cancer.

i am grateful that i have him as a friend, grateful he doesnt have to pay for healthcare with cash when he gets it, he can pay afterwards, i am grateful that our friends (mostly poor folx and punkrockers) have set this up for him.

i am grateful for my own health despite battling the flu the last two weeks generally i am healthy.
Prayers on the way.. For the dad, kids, and all of you!
 
#375 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
How many of you momma's use a sling?
DS never liked the sling or assorted wraps we tried, and I never felt comfortable either. But we use a backpack someone passed on to us, and he loves it. Great for shopping, b/c he hates being in the carseat or stroller too long and I won't put him in a shopping cart yet.
 
#376 ·
Here is a challenge: Post TEN things you are grateful for (Law of Attraction style) and then TEN things that would make you happy or make your life easier.

Maybe some of us can help with the wants/needs.... and the grattitudes can help you within.


Heck if you don't want to post it.... just do it for yourself!

*Trying to be more positive*
 
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