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November Low Income Mummas Support Thread

36K views 1K replies 64 participants last post by  Aura_Kitten 
#1 ·
I know it's a bit early, but I thought I would start this thread. (Mostly because if I don't force myself to start the thread, I won't post at all, and I really need the support...)

On a previous support thread, someone called life below the poverty line "bone-grindingly hard". That phrase is so perfect. I feel like I'm already doing all I can in the 24 hours I have every day, and it's still. not. enough. I work 40+ hours per week in an office. You'd think I'd make enough money to live on, but just trying to keep my 4 children fed, clothed, healthy, sheltered and warm takes just about everything I make, and then when you add school supplies, birthdays, Christmas, et cetera, and I just want to give up and cry.

This year, it's even worse. Nearly all of our quilts and blankets are finally giving their last gasp (they're all really old and get regular use), and winter in Montana is long and cold.

I'm so tired of not being able to provide my children with the life I want them to have. (I know they don't need ipods, mobile phones and 150 television channels, but is a warm bed too much to ask?
)

Thanks for listening to me whinge.
 
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#378 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
Monday in the US is Veteran's Day.

Banks are closed. No mail.

Just wanted to remind everyone so no one has any check/bank issues!

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Actually today is veteran's day but got to make it a 3-day weekend.
 
#381 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by shayinme View Post
I must admit I have been lurking but often feel like I don't belong here but really there is no place for me.Shay
Welcome shay. Sorry you have to be here. I hope a job comes through for you soon.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ian'smommaya View Post
tonight i am going to a benefit for one of my oldest friends. he is a single dad, truely single his kids' mom just died. and he is battling cancer.
Your poor friend. HUGS.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mama2babybeans View Post
My first time posting here

Welcome. When are you due?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
Yes I am bored....


How many of you knit, crochet or sew? Any good?

I can sew a bit and emboyried but the arthritis in my hand makes it just about impossible.

I am really bummed out tonight. Maybe its the lack of sleep or worry but GEEZ there are a lot of MDC has a lot of judgmental people here. It is just really bugging me. I have no idea why it is bugging me. I guess because the implication was your son has problems because you do not have money for food.
: My son has problems because he has JA and celiac disease. I talk to dh about it he said what he H are we suppose to do. We are right now buying him whatever he wants and he still does not eat. I am trying not to even thing of what kind of monster we are creating. Thankfully the other kids are not resentful that Liam is getting special foods. Okay I am done complaining now...

3 things:

That dh had the weekend off.
I got to spend the day with all of my family.
Maggie took a nap.
 
#382 ·
UGH! What a DAY! I worked a double AND to top it all off, my filling fell out in my top right side wisdom tooth, the one that they need to anesthetize me to yank and obviously can't now since I"m pregnant. AND to top it all off, my insurance wont' cover anesthesia over the age of 21(I'm 26) so it's gonna cost me $350. AND it's a long weekend. So I've gotta live with it like this and find a dentist to just temporarily fill it until I have the baby and then come up iwth the money to get it yanked. PLUS I have to find daycare for the nearly 3 year old. I'm just
: over here. I don't have the patience or willpower to read and respond right now ladies. I just wanna go sit and be miserable. Sometimes waiting tables is depressing and hard and you just want to crawl under the table and cry. I'll rest and watch some mindless tv and be back.
:
 
#384 ·
I haven't posted my 3 things in awhile so I suppose I should...

1. That my fiance and family get along so well, and that my family helps us so much
2. The box of diaper covers Thystle sent me
3. That we are actually doing ok with money and have the money for our car payment a week before its due!

I am still stressing about getting everything for this baby.. it all seems so overwhelming!! I am mostly worried about diapers and diaper coves and onesies/pajamas... I know it will all work out but I can't help but worry!!
 
#385 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by mama2babybeans View Post
We're planning our first homebirth and we have yet to buy all of our supplies..
and I am so stressed out from school right now.

But I am grateful that we are all healthy right now and that I'm nearing the end of this semester (and that much closer to my maternity break from school
)
What all is on your list - I may have some of it left from my Just in case I didn't make the hospital kit from DD.

And wow- you get a maternity break from school????? I had to be back in class for a test 6 days after DD was born! Luckily I'm one of those people who feels great after the babe is born, so it wasn't that bad.
 
#386 ·
I would love to be able to sew, knit, or crochet! When school ends for the semester, I am definitely going to try to learn to sew, because I just recieved a handed down sewing machine from dd's grandfather.

Well, I will attempt the challenge:
Ten Things I Am Grateful For
1) My own apartment.
2) DD
3) My family's health.
4) My slowly, but surely, building support system.
5) I can cook - and make something out of meager ingredients.
6) Food stamps.
7) Cooler weather.
8) My car.
9) Finally recieving my Associate of Arts.
10) Financial aid...and
: student loans.

Ten Things That Would Make Life Easier or Happier
1) More friends/socializing
2) Free child care
3) A job (steady income)
4) A boyfriend (yeah, on my mind way too much lately)
:
5) More time to do homework
6) A better sleeping schedule for dd (with regular naps)
7) um....a couch would be nice
8) Also, a little table to eat dinner at.
9) Finishing my Bachelor's degree (and then Masters)
10) More confidence
 
#387 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by justmama View Post
worked a double AND to top it all off, my filling fell out in my top right side wisdom tooth, the one that they need to anesthetize me to yank and obviously can't now since I"m pregnant.
I have never used it but I have heard this stuff works great in an emergency. http://http://www.amazon.com/Butler-.../dp/B000RCLWIA

Oh it looks like Walgreens has it for $5.49 lot cheaper then above.
 
#388 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by LankyLizards View Post
Ten Things That Would Make Life Easier or Happier
1) More friends/socializing
2) Free child care
3) A job (steady income)
4) A boyfriend (yeah, on my mind way too much lately)
:
5) More time to do homework
6) A better sleeping schedule for dd (with regular naps)
7) um....a couch would be nice
8) Also, a little table to eat dinner at.
9) Finishing my Bachelor's degree (and then Masters)
10) More confidence

Have you checked out the free section of Craig's list. You can sometimes get some really awesome stuff there.
 
#389 ·
No, I have not, mum4boys. I really haven't tried sooo hard to get a table and a couch actually because it sort of looked like I was just going to be moving in with my mother for a little while there. I need to see if my area has a Freecycle group too.
 
#390 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by LankyLizards View Post
4) A boyfriend (yeah, on my mind way too much lately)
:
: Way too much... Don't worry about it/him. Cute guy is only cute guy. Boyfriends bring more B-things--boredom, bills, etc. Do you want my whole list? I made one once and still have it.
It was actually for a lit class!

Anyway, you don't need one.
 
#391 ·
Ten Things I am Grateful For


1. My job @ WF that gives me 20% off on groceries
2. My apartment
3. DH and DS
4. Our health
5. Even though I'm making $800 less a month, we still able to pay the bills even if they're late
6. That I can make my nieces and nephews some cool gifts for Christmas
7. We have health insurance
8. That both of our cars are still working
9. I'll be getting overtime since its starting to get busy at work
10. That DH realizes that sometimes I need to come home and just sit in the bathtub with a book and not be bothered


Ten THings that would make life easier

1. My husband would do dishes, vacum and clean bathrooms
2. That my cat would learn how to do these things as well
3. My son would be fully potty trained so I can stop hearing comments from people who tell me I am "spoiling" him by not setting my foot down on the issue.
4.That my other job would get the contract with the company that they're dealing with so that they could hire me back and I can make more money.
5. Winter won't be too cold and no snow until after Christmas (or none at all) because I hate driving in it, but since I live in PA I am sure this won't happen

6.My husband would get a life insurance policy, so I can stop stressing out about what would happen.

I am going to have to think about 4 more things, so I'll come back to this.
 
#392 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by mum4boys View Post
Welcome shay. Sorry you have to be here. I hope a job comes through for you soon.

Your poor friend. HUGS.

Welcome. When are you due?

I can sew a bit and emboyried but the arthritis in my hand makes it just about impossible.

I am really bummed out tonight. Maybe its the lack of sleep or worry but GEEZ there are a lot of MDC has a lot of judgmental people here. It is just really bugging me. I have no idea why it is bugging me. I guess because the implication was your son has problems because you do not have money for food.
: My son has problems because he has JA and celiac disease. I talk to dh about it he said what he H are we suppose to do. We are right now buying him whatever he wants and he still does not eat. I am trying not to even thing of what kind of monster we are creating. Thankfully the other kids are not resentful that Liam is getting special foods. Okay I am done complaining now...

3 things:

That dh had the weekend off.
I got to spend the day with all of my family.
Maggie took a nap.
!

They're not cheap and you're gonna kill me for even suggesting this...
: But have you taken him to an ND? They don't mess around and IME often offer more help than MDs. Mine charges $30/visit and is also a chiropractor. But he's given me a reduced rate before. You should really look into it.
 
#393 ·
10 gratitudes:
1. sis and BIL (I thought of cheating and listing them separately but didn't!)
2. precious, healthy, no-trouble DS
3. writing jobs--even though they suck and pay very little
4. a workable budget
5. free coffee! sis pays
6. full oil tank for heat
7. free books to read--library, audiobooks, ebooks
8. No mail tomorrow--no bills!
9. Golden Girls--good for laughs
10. my RMT certification (I'm a Reiki Master Teacher... long story but it does me good)
11. DH is a total PITA but at least supports me in my parenting/birthing choices
 
#395 ·
Yeah, I agree with MrsKennedy(tonight anyway) cute guy is MUCH more fun being JUST cute guy.

So, ediesmom and any other Mama here that use the bus, tell me why you hate and or like the bus. With gas prices the way they are, I'm thinking of getting a bus pass for us to use. Obviously, grocery shopping nad school are different, but other than that, it might be the cheaper thing to do?

C
 
#396 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by mrskennedy View Post
: Way too much... Don't worry about it/him. Cute guy is only cute guy. Boyfriends bring more B-things--boredom, bills, etc. Do you want my whole list? I made one once and still have it.
It was actually for a lit class!

Anyway, you don't need one.
Hmm... how about bulls**t? Yeah, I know. But it's been a really really long time since I have even felt attracted to someone.
 
#397 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
How many of you knit, crochet or sew? Any good?
I do. I'm actually really good at knitting & crocheting (fun advanced work, complex stitches, laces, and I do beautiful invisible joins...) and decent at sewing, though that could use more work. The better question: Why don't you knit, crochet, or sew these days? Well, my kids have no respect for my things, and I have little time and less patience for things which will be destroyed. While there is little more satisfying than completing such a project, the intense rage and sense of inadequacy I feel when such a project is destroyed before it's completed, ruined while I'm in the midst of it...
: I've got enough reasons to feel angry and demoralized without deliberately exposing myself to more.
:

Ten things to feel greatful for:

1. The unemployment check being deposited.
2. Soup, and the fact that it's cold enough that living primarily on soup isn't quite as depressing a thought as it could be.
3. A relatively easy pregnancy (physically).
4. mike, who tries.
5. Cyber charter school.
6. Project SHARE.
7. Kids who like vegetables and fruits; rather, kids who aren't picky eaters in general.
8. The bottle of Lantus my mom gave to mike, that's allowed me to sleep for a few weeks in relative peace.
9. We have a washer and dryer, and still have some of that gigantic box of Bi-O-Kleen I bought when I was pregnant with Bella (we use other detergents too, and very little of the Bi-O-Kleen because it's a high-efficiency washer).
10. my character in Gemstone, who has a complicated life but who is in so many ways better off than I. If I don't feel loved or appreciated, at least I can get it vicariously through her.

Ten things that would make my life easier:

1. A friend with benefits. (It's complicated.

2. A dentist who works for free.
3. Can I just say cold hard cash? Cold hard cash would really do wonders...

4. A house I don't have to worry about getting kicked out of anytime soon.
5. Someone to chase the kids for a few hours every day.
6. Health insurance for mike. When he doesn't have Lantus, he has these *horrific* pre-dawn hypoglycemic episodes. Not only are they a HUGE health issue for him, they're terrifying for the kids and an incredibla PITA for me. I've blogged about it a few times, but I try not to think about it too much the rest of the time because it really, REALLY messes things up. Lantus is painfully expensive, though, so without insurance picking up everything but a copay, we really can't afford it *at all*.
:
7. Real life friends. I really need to get out and to have company when I do.
8. Lower gas prices, so that I could go places without feeling guilty for burning the fuel.
9. Being about 70 pounds lighter and fungus-free. Actually, I think being pretty in general would probably help. (Not just having pretty hair.
)
10. Floravital & flax seed oil. Energy and a clear head are far more conducive to optimism than my current state.
 
#398 ·
Eilonwy,
. Three hugs just for you. I wish I could send more. Heck, me and dd would come there and help wrangle your kids. (Having a job to do keeps her from being crazy and destructive). However, I doubt I could afford transportation. Oh, sigh. Hang in there, mama. (Perhaps, I should have put "friend with benefits" too, instead of boyfriend, that's more what I want, anyway- not sure if you meant it the way I do though...)
 
#399 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by LankyLizards View Post
(Perhaps, I should have put "friend with benefits" too, instead of boyfriend, that's more what I want, anyway- not sure if you meant it the way I do though...)
By "friend with benefits" I mean a friend who could be warm, snuggly, physically intimate.. and who could go home and leave me to continue living my life.
All the good b-words from having a boyfriend and none of the real PITA ones.
 
#400 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by eilonwy View Post
By "friend with benefits" I mean a friend who could be warm, snuggly, physically intimate.. and who could go home and leave me to continue living my life.
All the good b-words from having a boyfriend and none of the real PITA ones.

Yes! Sounds great, sign me up for one!!
 
#401 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by eilonwy View Post
By "friend with benefits" I mean a friend who could be warm, snuggly, physically intimate.. and who could go home and leave me to continue living my life.
All the good b-words from having a boyfriend and none of the real PITA ones.

amen sista!!!! When you find one please tell us where!!!!
I actually have a medical excuse for needing one
due to my meds for my thyroid.

Now for replies:

eilonwy - What is flaxseed oil FOR? I have a ton of samples of it, and have been trying to figure out what it is for & how you take it. Also I think their is a patient assistance program for lantus {or was a few years ago} - my mother was on it for a while.

Nursingnaturalmom - I Love the bus!!! I get to ride all I want for $25 a semester, and DD rides free. I use it to go pretty much everywhere! I have even gotten groceries on the bus {not as easy but doable}.

Thystle - I can sew {and have since I was 12}. I do some embroidery, and I'm trying to teach myself how to knit. I do quilts too!

Ten things to feel greatful for:

1. My pantries which are full - we won't go hungry for at least a month.
2. My parents, who are the best.
3. Pinecone Research & other online survey companies - they help pay the bills.
4. That I can cook, and have a mother who can turn anything into a decent meal.
5. Food Stamps & medicaid & WIC
6. Craigslist
7. Mothering.commune - I get the support here that I so desperately need.
8. that DD is gifted - which while I may complain & see it as a burden at times is something I'm grateful for.
9. A warm roof over our heads
10. thrift stores, which we are blessed to have very good ones within walking distance.

Ten things that would make my life easier:

1. A friend with benefits.
2. A dentist who works for free.
3. $$$$
4. Losing around 75lbs
5. my Father getting help for his altimerz
6. Me finding a job
7. Me being able to abandon the wheelchair fully {working on it}
8. Finding a doc that takes medicaid for my thyroid issues
9. Not having $80,000 in student loan debts
10. DD's lead level going down
11. Finding my bus pass!
 
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