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Posts by Shann

My two boys are 13 and 14 and they both smoke. I learned early on that all attempts to stop them were failing. Some things you just have to let go on. This is what I did. So, yes, they smoke, and I gave up the constant battle. They won, I lost.
My first reaction would be that I agree with AbbieB...I think the discipline is way over the top for just cussing! I don't really think that is punishable by suspension (or it SHOULDN'T be, at least). Cussing isn't that big of a thing, really. 99 % of all kids these days cuss like that now, and most schools I know of just take it in stride and no longer punish for it. I think I would check this one out and challenge it.
I'm sorry, but I don't see anything wrong with them dancing that way. Yes, it is perfectly normal and many young girls do dance that way and are taught to dance that way. I say let them dance however they want !
I'm sorry, but i think you need to back off and leave her alone. If that's the way she likesit, then it's her choice, not yours. It's HER room, and HER stuff! My own kids have room's that look worse than that and I just let them decide how they want it. They don't clean their rooms and I don't hassle them about it. Choose your battles...and this isn't one worth fighting.
I'm sorry, but I just think the OP way over-reacted to this. In the big scheme of things, pot smoking isnt that big of a deal.
Oh, yes, Journeymom, it IS indeed a real look for teens/preteens! MANY kids find this to be an important look for them as well. And yes, I mean the dirty clothes too, not just the grubby looking clothes...actually dirty! And yes, I allow it. I do insist on clean underwear, and they don't give me a problem on that. But everything else is personal choice in our household, from jeans to shirts to hairstyle to bathing/showering rituals. We might express our preferences...
I would totally let all of that go. It's not that important, especially the clothes thing. Read the "preteens/teens and the grubby look" thread that I started. It might give you some insight into what others think about "the messy look." Personally, i'm all for letting them do what they want with their bodies and their clothes.
Beloved k, you are exactly correct! I have learned through my boys, their friends (both male and female), and other kids of that age group that I have been associated with, that this grubby/grimy look is VERY important to a large number of kids. And it SHOULD be important to them if that is what they like. And they should be allowed to engage in it to whatever level they enjoy. After only a couple episodes of getting screamed at after washing their jeans (and even...
Transitions, I know what you mean! We "prefer" that our boys shower daily, but we don't even force that issue either.We feel that even that falls into the category of "personal choice" just as the clothes do, and our boys rarely live up to the shower preferences that we have for them (and that's also ok with us if that's their choice). And we don't mind at all if the clothes are as dirty and ratty as they want them. We actually think it's rather cool ourselves!
Even though this is not an issue in my household, I know it is a problem for some parents of teens and preteens, and I wanted to get a feel for it and to have it discussed a bit in here. The issue is the "grubby look" among most teens and preteens these days. I am sure you all know what I mean if you have had this age group: the torn and stained--and in most cases even DIRTY-- jeans, the sloppy shirts, the oversized and messy hoodies, the grimy and stinky sneakers, no...
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