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Posts by PoorUglyHappy

Dornmama - Last Thanksgiving and Christmas were the worst for me.   Everyone kept telling me to keep busy.   I "kept busy" by reading every adoption and foster care blog/book I could find.    This just made it worse, I think, in retrospect.   My mom suggested I make a quilt for the future baby.   I had time to make TWO. ( I do get plenty of use out of both with our pukey FS.)   I also made an Amazon wishlist that was full of baby stuff that I wanted/needed in case I got a...
Deborah - Good luck with hubby's business!   Hope to see you back on the adoption path soon.   Queenjane - Why is there a 5 day limit on the adoptive family for the two girls?  Is it because they are adopt only and not foster?     Piratemere - Here, it seems, permanency always takes precedence over sibling contact especially at her stage of the game.  I will keep fingers and toes crossed for your next court hearing.   
I agree!  I think that is why I was looking more for personal stories.     I think I just read too many studies, LOL.    We all know how data can be manipulated to support one opinion or another.  Like I said before,  I think I was just looking for something to help me say no to the calls.  I certainly think I could handle it but I had 2 infants for a short time this past summer and I know the more demanding baby gets more attention.  FS is really easy going.   We also...
QueenJane - I don't think it applies to older children.  There is an increased risk for attachment issues when there is too small an age gap between infant siblings.   It was one of the things examined in the big Kauai study.   But, I don't know if it applies to adopted children as well.  
Believe me, I would rather not have all the social services intervention.  However, I feel like it is so important for them to be cautious with foster families so I fully support the visits.  I drive hours in traffic to facilitate family visits because feel it is important for my FS to foster those relationships.  Also, FS has tons of dr. appointments, therapy, early intervention, etc.   I am certainly not one of those "parenting by convenience" people however, I am...
Does anyone have any insights into "ideal" age gaps between adopted children? Of course I know there is no true ideal age gap.   I have read some articles about issues that come up with adopting kids older than your children.  I am mainly concerned with attachment issues for children adopted too close together.  Any research? personal stories?   I am trying to plan ahead.  My current FS is 6 months with adoption likely by 18-20 mo.  I am already tired of the revolving...
Does anyone have any insights into "ideal" age gaps between adopted children? Of course I know there is no true ideal age gap.   I have read some articles about issues that come up with adopting kids older than your children.  I am mainly concerned with attachment issues for children adopted too close together.  Any research? personal stories?   I am trying to plan ahead.  My current FS is 6 months with adoption likely by 18-20 mo.  I am already tired of the revolving...
Smithie, I want to become a GAL too!  after I am done with all this fostering madness.  I would love for you keep us updated on that process as well. :)
Welcome Lovekiddos! How was your home study?  How long is the wait in ID?   After my final homestudy, it took no time at all for me to get a placement.  I got 3 calls the first week.  I saw a documentary on foster care in ID recently.    Deborah - These are hard decisions to make.  It sounds like it was partly a financial decision - this I totally understand.     MountainMama - Waiting is hard, right?  But it sounds as though you are steadily moving up the...
I second what MountainMama said.  I think many people don't think of foster care adoption because they don't know a lot about it/ it seems scary.   Let me know if you have any questions!
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