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Posts by rubelin

I'm in LA and was able to apply for full benefits while still being legally married but living separately (though I didn't use child care benes). My ex had been laid off so my support from him was cut 90%. They did require me to allow them to open a child support case against him with the DA's office (which they do anytime they give county benefits to a single parent) but it never went through in the 6 mo I was getting aid (he got a job and could pay the reg. amount...
I think it might be time to stop tagging him on FB posts. Stop making it easier for him. If he's gonna disappear, let him do it. It sucks for your son, but it sucks whether or not you try to keep dad in the picture, when he's not trying to be there.   Your son has an amazing momma and you'll make sure he's got fabulous men in his life, too so he won't miss out on that. It's your ex's loss, whether or not he ever realizes that =(
I just thought of a funny story that happened with my friend's daughter when she was 2. We'd all gone camping (me w/ my 2 boys and her with her 2 boys and DD). Sometime in the trip, I realized that her DD was calling me Mom. At first I thought she was asking where her mom was but then it became clear that she was talking to me and I heard her calling my friend Mommy. She'd been hearing my boys call out to me so decided that was my name, and, in her mind, it's a totally...
even families that actually DO have 2 moms find different things to call each one. We even use different names for various grandparents so nobody gets called the same thing. It's utterly confusing of the child and hurtful for the parent who actually IS the mama. I'm so sorry that your ex and his gf are being so hurtful towards you.
a court will nearly always approve an agreement by the parents. It's only when one of them contests something that the court needs to make the final decision. If you're stuck with a crappy ex who fights you about everything, you do end up at the mercy of the courts.
If you've got sole custody, I'd probably wait until a marriage is planned and tell him simply as a courtesy that some life change is happening. And maybe if you move in w/ your sweetie before marriage, it would be considerate of you to inform your ex of the change in his child's living situation
There was a mom here who moved across the country to be with her own family to get away from her abusive ex (she'd moved to marry the ex) and was ordered to take the child back and I think the father (who never wanted to spend any time with the child before that) got 50/50 custody. Not sure what ended up happening, last I'd heard she ended up staying in that tiny town to be close to her kid. It was horrible for her.
I would think if you have sole legal custody, and he only has supervised visitation EOM, then he has no other right to your son than that. You notified him about the dental procedure, and I'd say that's about as much as you'd need to do. He can't demand extra visitation other times, why would this be any different?   or, rather, he can demand whatever he wants but you are only legally obliged to take your son to the EOM visits.
I'm of the mind that EC is the norm (how human bodies developed) so it's rarely pottying that's the problem, but something in the way that the pottying is done, kwim?   Maybe she's cold? Maybe the position you're holding her in (or she's sitting in) is squishing her uncomfortably? Maybe you get anxious pottying her so she's upset by that?   Be sure she's fully supported against you, that you aren't holding her thighs too tight. You might try a top-hat potty in your lap...
I don't think you're over-reacting - he's such a piece of work.   I think this is not a toy that should be part of your life. Keep it in the car, and hand it over at the visits. He can't require you to have it charged, that's on him.   I'm also assuming that there is no contact between you & he at the visits, that you go through the supervisor?  He's gonna look real great when he gets upset that his electronic babysitter isn't ready to be used the moment his kid...
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