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Posts by Allie74

  That is very sad. I had a similiar experience as a child. When visiting my dad every other weekend my stepsister made it clear I was only a visitor, and it was HER house and she didn't want me there. My dad wouldn't say anything out of fear of angering my stepmother (she was very defensive when it came to her daughter and we all had to accomodate her precious daughter and who cared about anyone else) and i was too scared to tell my mom. What could've my mom done...
I a grown child of divorce, and i can tell you what i did as a kid. Christmas eve and Christmas morning I spent with my mom and grandma, and then Christmas afternoon i spent with my dad and all of his family. My dad and his wife spent Christmas eve with her family. I am very fond of my stepmother's family, but there was no way to fit seeing them into Christmas as well. Since Thanksgiving wasn't as important to my mom, I usually went for Thanksgiving with my dad to see my...
 I feel for my Dad as well, but he never stands up to his wife and has allowed her to control him for years so he is partly to blame as well. I don't believe in giving into people just cause they throw a fit. That is giving into childish behavior in adults and being controlled by them cause you fear them. I will no longer fear my SM like i used to where i would just go along with whatever she said cause i was terrified of her wrath. You have to have boundaries with...
   I have an absolutely toxic, negatve, insecure, jealous, debbie downer, bossy, controlling stepmother. Nobody in my dad's family can stand her and I know thats hard for her, but if she wouldnt be such a difficult person to be around people wouldn't dread being around her. She is only tolerated at best. Everytime I see her she starts crying about what a horrible life she's had cause she was a single mom, she had to work, her exhusband left her, ect. She's always looking...
  My husband and I have one biological daughter, who's still a baby. We would like to add to our family through adoption. However I am in my late 30s, and I know adoption can take awhile, so by the time things are complete we could very well be into our 40s. Are there any chance of us adopting seeing how we are older? We would prefer to adopt a Caucasian baby of no older than 1 year.
   Its really difficult cause SM is one of those people that feels all family has to celebrate on the actual holiday. Since she's unwilling to compromise, well just too bad for her. I wouldn't mind seeing her family another time, but i'd of course be expected to drive the 2 hours to their town with my baby cause they never come visit here.     So I think what I've come up with is....      Thanksgiving---- combine with both Mom and Inlaws every year (Dad and...
I agree to talk to your stepdaughter. I have a stepmother who DEMANDS she be called Grandma. There is no compromise with her whatsoever (not even Grandma First Name) and I am not comfortable even saying Grandma when referring to DD. I would've loved it if she would've been okay with just her first name, but she says how thats disrespectful. So who knows what DD will end up calling her. I wish SM was the type of person to have a reasonable conversation with, but she...
Since I had divorced parents i was always had to leave my newly open gifts on christmas. it was xmas eve and xmas morning with mom, and then off to dad's to see my grandparents and extended family on that side, and then back to mom's by christmas evening. I did just fine, and hopefully my kids will too. But if it does get to be too much then like i mentioned whoever doesn't get christmas day (dad or inlaws) will just have to accept alternating and getting new years eve...
  I posted before about my stepmother. Known her for 26 years and we're not close. I am very uncomfortable around her, and spend most of the year avoiding her as she causes me tons of anxiety. I tolerate her for my dad's sake and do a good acting job at least pretending to be friendly towards her. I am married and have a 6 month old baby.     My dad has never spent Thanksgiving with his family(my aunts, uncles, cousins). He's always gone to his wife's family out of...
It is a little wierd living so close to my dad and his wife, yet only seeing her a few times a year. We could very well bump into her at a grocery store or somewhere. But even with the close distance there are some relatives that are so toxic and have done things in the past that are so cruel that you just can't allow them into your daily life and SM is one of those people that I have to put up a lot of boundaries with. Its difficult cause as a kid I was so scared of...
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