I'm so sorry for your loss & the trip to the ER on top of it.
Here is a link to the pregnancy & birth loss forum, you have to be signed in to access it. I found it to be very helpful.
We didn't find out before and we won't again this time. I caught my dd & was the first to find out she was a girl, that really was an amazing moment. I still have clothes from both, so we should be ok either way. I also adore natural, simple clothes but they are so pricey!
I also had sciatica in both prior pregnancies, but it usually didn't start until well into the 2nd/3rd trimester! I'm so sorry mama, I know how excruciating it is! Chiropracter is a godsend to help with that pain though. Hope you get some relief soon!
Texan, I hope you can get some answers soon. Sitting in between and not knowing is such a hard place to be.
Erica, I am so sorry for your loss. I found a lot of comfort in the loss boards here after my loss a few months ago.