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Posts by our veggie baby

hmm, redirecting just means to change the course of an action or conversation...you don't have to completely stop the action...like, hubby doesn't have to stop doing his work at all in the example I gave for me to gently redirect the activity to another location that is agreeable and respectful for and to everyone involved....weird... Or in terms of a child, if they are kicking the chair and you say something like "chairs are not for kicking, here you can kick this ball...
Oh, I KNEW that would come up!! It is so lovely, not to mention completely disrespectful, to completely discount someone's opinions, life experience, research, thoughts, etc based on the fact that someone "doesn't have children"...the whole "you'll see" attitude pisses me off and offends me to no end. Incidentally, people use that same arguement when convincing me that spanking is the way to go! "You'll seeee...." I never said EVER that you speak to, deal with,...
I apologize...again, I am sure your parents are wonderful people, but I should probably use personal examples...so I will I love my mom greatly, we are VERY close and she is AWESOME and I would do almost anything for her...however, I can admit she made A LOT of mistakes growing up in the way she um, well, "disciplined" us....that doesn't in any way detract from my love for her or how wonderful of a person she is, but for whatever reason, she didn't have the tools,...
I didn't say you were "disciplining" your friend in that situation, I said you were using your personal discipline to redirect, to be gentle about the cooking, to be respectful...the "discipline" goes both ways in GD to me...for instance, a child might be like "your dinner was G R O S S!!!!" to that same friend, because they haven't learned personal discipline and self control yet, and really shouldn't be faulted for it, but obvioulsy it should be worked on or "taught"...
I completely agree, but sometimes you have to alter your behavior/words to anyone, not just children, based on their personality, their sensetivity, their perception and in an attempt not to disrespect them or hurt their feelings.... ...for instance, say I am trying to lose weight....and my husband knows this...and I have even asked him for help... (arbitrary example but go with it for a second)... Say he sees me lurking around the kitchen right....and I open the...
People seem to forget and disregard that the "discipline" in gentle discipline applies to both parties... you may not feel like you are "disciplining" your children when you work through a problem---however, I personally feel that you are acting disciplined yourself (in the way we will call a dedicated athlete *disciplined*) in using the restraint, understanding, gentleness, respect etc to treat your child with respect...instead of what some people may do who aren't...
So, take what you like from that. To me if someone sees GD as disrespectful, whether adult or child alike, someone is doing something wrong...as I feel if excecuted properly, GD is VERY respectful... ...but I am becoming redundant. If you cooked a meal for me that tasted like crap, and asked me how it was, and I GENTLY used my personal DISCIPLINE to REDIRECT from the fact that it was crap and focused on the dessert which I liked, and asked for the recipe...you would...
I think of it as protection of their spirit in the sense that it is not right for me to put all my fears, hang-ups, frustrations, anger, issues from my childhood on them...so I will strive to be as gentle as possible and understanding, towards my children and towards humans in general...of course we all make mistakes...but like, I feel I am protecting someone's spirit and feelings when I choose to be understanding and gentle with them instead of yelling and...
Um..yes...in a way... Sometimes my hubby can be a brat about things too truthfully...well, I can too, but for instance, he has a lovely habit (found it this morning even)....of leaving a jam-encrusted spoon stuck to the counter....he enjoys toast with jam occasionally, cool.... ...so after 230473240237 times of putting it away and cleaning the counter, I have taken to mentioning it in a nice, often humorous way...like today I said jokingly "my morning wouldn't be...
I don't think it is the only way of course not, and like I said, it probably would have been better to say "gentle communication" instead of discipline ...kind of along the same lines as I doon't feel you can be eating a steak and claiming to be an animal lover, which I see all the time--but hey, people do...all the time....but whole different post....LOL
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