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Posts by mamaduck

I've known kids with quirks to be miserable in catholic school and then do better in public school where they are more accostomed to a variety of behaviors and differences.
Quote: So far I'm not exactly impressed with her follow-up, given that I left a message yesterday and haven't heard back yet. Is the therapist part of a group or an agency? If so -- there may be a separate intake number that you have to call first. Or, maybe she was off yesterday. Or maybe she's swamped. Times are hard -- mental health workers are in high demand!
Good idea to talk to feel her out about therapy. I was going to suggest that but you beat me to it! I would ask potential therapists about their approach. It is difficult to find someone certified in CBT, but plenty of therapists are familiar with the techniques. Therapy for anxiety should have at least a little bit of structure to it -- not completely client directed. CBT techniques are generally acknowledged as the best approach for anxiety. If it were my child, I...
Do you have reason to believe that she would attach a particular stigma to being in therapy? Kids don't always have the same judgements and assumptions that adults do. If you do bring it up, prepare yourself to be matter of fact and "not scary" about it!
Having worked with a lot of anxious kids, I will say that most of them really liked therapy, and that a lot of talking isn't really necessary. If the therpist is decent he or she will have a variety of activities on hand that involve drawing, writing, playing etc.. I will say though, that in order to tackle anxious feelings it is important to recognize them for what they are and to label them. I don't think the message needs to be "something is wrong with you" but...
Quote: Originally Posted by mamahart I honestly cannot believe anyone is suggesting therapy of any sort for a sweet successful girl who feels more comfortable at home than at a party! Well, if that were the only complaint than I would agree with you. What worries me is: 1) A persistent pattern of anxiety from young childhood that has not resolved on its own. 2) Daily crying that lasts several weeks and cannot be explained. 3) Missing...
I'm hearing enough red flags in your post to warrent your concerns for her. I think you are handling things well, but it might be helpful to her to start learning some strategies for coping and riding out her bad feelings. Don't get me wrong -- I would never leave her at a sleepover, camp etc.. when she is feeling like this! (Having to take her out of school for 2 weeks does concern me a little bit.) But in the interest of feeling better and being able to handle...
I forgot to say that I'd also stop taking money from your daughter as a cosequence for power struggles. If the money is tied to the task of babysitting, and she babysits, then give her the money. However, I would charge her if I had to do her chores for her. But it would be as detached and unemotional as I could make it. "I cleaned up your dirty clothes off the floor this morning and I charge 50 cents for that." I think you might benefit from starting another thread...
I would organize your expectations into 2 catagories: 1) One or two set chores that are reasonable and age appropriate that happen every day at the same time as part of your routine. These should not take more than 15-20 minutes and can go onto a chart that you post, and if you want to associate a consequence or a reward you can -- but it should be a consistent consequence or reward. It does not have to be a tangible -- it can be, but it could also be, "After chores we...
It is not ideal to have 20, 25, or 30 five year olds in one class. But this is the reality in a lot of schools. Even with 15 - 20, it is a lot to manage. You really do have to build in routines and limits about the bathroom, or you end up with lots of kids in there together doing all sorts of wild things. (I don't really want my kid in the bathroom at school alone with kids who may have all sorts of various behavior issues.) So, yes -- there does need to be some...
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