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Posts by DevaMajka

ITA.   To ME what the bolded says is that he has an option- he can either not hit and keep all of his toys, or he can hit and have toys taken away. For some kids, the punishment can be seen as "payment" for the crime, kwim? When I give options, I make sure that they are true options, and it's fine with me whichever one dc choose. "If you don't wear your helmet, you can't ride the bike" is fine, because I'm ok with either one he chooses. "If you don't pick up your toys...
What I'm wondering about is what level of responsibility should my 6yo have in these situations? In the legal world, you hear about mitigating your damages. Does my 6yo have a responsibility to keep himself safe? I'm not concerned about dealing with the almost 2yo, I'm confident about how we are handling that, and that we will adjust our reactions as necessary. It's not always hitting or biting, but can be any number of hurtful or boundary crossing...
I'm trying to really keep food costs down for the moment, and I'm wondering if there are any other good "filler" type foods to help with that that I haven't already thought about. So far, I've thought of potatoes, rice, other grains (millet, barley), pasta, dried beans, and dried lentils. Oh, and cabbage (but I don't have many cabbage recipes). Obviously I'd like to keep things somewhat healthy, so ramen noodles are sort of out. lol. (though we do enjoy them every so...
The first thing that came to mind when reading your post was to post these articles: Where's My Center Who's in Control? The Unhappy Consequences of Being Child-Centered   When things get too hard for me, I know I need to change something. That doesn't mean that I need to be more strict. Just that something in the way that I relate to my kids needs to change. Maybe I need to be more firm. Maybe I need to spend more quality time with them. Maybe I need to say "no"...
He did impress upon her that it was unacceptable, and that she might get hit if she were to do it again. However, I doubt she understood that she could have gotten killed. If she did have the cognitive ability to understand that, she wouldn't have had to be hit to refrain from running towards moving cars.
  Yes, more than one of them. I'm really hoping that it's a matter of the mods being busy (I know that happens), or not really knowing where to begin in cleaning up the thread.Quote: I think she's saying (Storm Bride, correct me if I'm wrong) that in the situation she's talking about, her dd was being hit by her ds.     Quote: I think she made a good point actually, that not all spanking is violent. Spanking that is consensual is, imo, not violent. (circ'ing in most...
  But that's what I was saying- there is no loving way to hit a (non consenting) child. I said upthread that I liked to be spanked. But that's now, as a consenting adult. It's an entirely different thing to like spanking because it gives you pleasant erotic feelings. Not the same use of physical touch at all. Hitting kids as discipline "works" precisely because they don't like it.    
I'm really disheartened that there are people who are defending spanking on the GENTLE DISCIPLINE board on mothering.com. I'm even more bothered by the fact that the posts that are advocating spanking are still here.   The Terms of Service say:    
I didn't see where anyone said that the act of being spanked made them feel loved in that moment. They felt loved by their parents, sure. I felt loved by my mom. Not *because* I was spanked, though.   An adult friend who likes to be spanked and consents to it? Or a child friend who likes to be spanked by adults?    
   
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