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Posts by sozobe

Just want to speak up as an only who was/is perfectly content to be an only. I really agree with the personality/ luck of the draw thing. For that reason, I wince a bit at "a gift you give a child". Maybe, but maybe not. I've been thinking about this a LOT, and my conclusion is that there are positives and negatives to having more than one child, and ultimately you just need to do what feels right to YOU. Say you have a second child because you feel you owe it to...
Ha!! Entertaining to read, sounds like you did the right thing. I LOVE the reconstructive surgery.
Quote: Originally posted by Breathe Curly, You are definitely on to something with asking about the wake-up times and naps. My little punkin is a night-owl and he comes by it naturally. His preference would be to sleep until 9:30 am, nap from 3-6, and then be up until 11 or 12. And who can blame him?! That sounds perfect to me, too! But the problem is (as someone later pointed out) that WE NEED SOME FRICKIN' TIME TO OURSELVES!!! I mean, I give him...
It just depends on so many different things. I got "you're so smart" all the time. I liked it. I reveled in being smart. I didn't earn any playground names. I also went to a very cool Open School in which different = good. That wasn't so much my parents or my neighborhood as the school. Letting your children know that you think they are wonderful and you are proud of them is never a bad thing, IMO. I'm sure there are ways to do so that have greater and lesser...
Quote: Originally posted by dentente I guess as a former "precocious" child I would like to caution against making the child aware of their giftedness. Does that make sense? My parents liked to tell me that I was "different" and "smarter" than other kids. That made me a little freaked out. So, um, don't do that. I totally get what you're saying, but I think this may be one of those individual things rather than more general. My parents told me...
Just posted in another thread that dd said, while leaving with dh and I after playing with a family of three kids, "I want a whole family!" We have thought and talked about this a lot and have been pretty comfortable with "no more, at least not now." Then this. However, she did then define a "whole family" as "Mama, Papa, and ME!" I go back and forth and back and forth on this one. She such a social, nurturing little kid -- the kind who walks up to strangers,...
I've been really thinking about this one. My dd has a friend she sees about 3x/month -- I wish it were more often, but her mom is busy and has a best friend who lives a couple of blocks away, and doesn't have as much of a need to see us as we do to see them, KWIM? We all get along great, but I don't want to be pushy about getting together. (We have about a 2/3 ratio already, where she contacts me twice for every three times I contact her.) Anyway, my dd is VERY...
Quote: Originally posted by ameliabedeliaky However, I did want to mention one thing. This phase that you used "but I couldn't stop" made my think that perhaps you might have been suffering from a sexual addiction. Not being able to stop does not sound normal to me. Goodness gracious. Yes, it's normal. Yes, some people have higher sex drives than others. And yes, that's FINE. Women are horny, too, and that's OK. (Should I make that my...
I find that if I start with the simplest possible answer, that often satisfies my dd. I'm totally blanking on examples... : (Long day.) But to that one I would probably say something like, "Do you notice that those words sound alike? Water and wet?" (With my dd, that would often be enough... "Oh, I see!") If she wanted more, I would say that one word came from the other. They are really just two ways of saying the same thing. Here's a site I found that backs...
Exactly. (The bonobos, a kind of chimpanzee and our closest relatives, chromosomally, shed some really interesting light on the whole "purpose of sex" question. Basically, they have sex a lot to ease social, uh, intercourse, instead of using violence to establish social orders like other species. "Make love, not war", indeed! Studies of other species are always of limited use in examining how us homo sapiens tick, but there seems to be a lot of evidence that sex at...
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