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Posts by bczmama

I-AM-MOTHER -- Can we get away from the generalizations of the behaviors of the so-called "natural" peoples and comparisons to our behaviors in America today? The behaviors and beliefs of peoples living still in traditional or tribal fashions (or of historical child-rearing) are so widely divergent as to make any claim about some sort of "natural" child-rearing norm to be fruitless or even offensive (as if all tribal peoples are alike). A number of the claims in your...
I'm so sorry for your situation! I can understand that this all must be very stressful. If I *knew* that I wasn't going to need a retirement, I think I would handle things in the following way. If my DH and I had been saving, say 20% of income for retirement for both of us, I would ask that "my" 10% be available for my own use now -- for some large expensive items (like a very special trip) and for improving my day to day life. I would also want to set aside some...
"It also doesn't often occur to me that culture and ethnicity is important to others because I have none myself." White folks from America have culture too. You may not have specific ethnic food or religious traditions from europe, but you are far from culture-less. In fact, I'm sure large swaths of the world would (due to American TV, movies, music, books, clothing and food being imported abroad) view your culture as being one of the world's most dominant.
"Quite likely, actually." And your basis for this is? "If you can't agree, tell him you will put half the money in what you want, and he can put half the money into bonds or something super stable like that. I bet in 10 years yours will be kicking his butt." There is certainly nothing wrong with a diversified portfolio. An 100% stock portfolio is aggressive, and while the OP and her husband are relatively young, I don't think a financial advisor would say that...
When someone expresses how much a problem disturbs them, it is natural that people will attempt to offer solutions. You clearly don't want solutions. Since the problem can't be "solved", you can then only decide how to feel about it. Since you have a laundry list of situations which would (apparently) be far worse for you, maybe you need to re-evaluate your current situation and think about it more positively.
We are continuing to max out contributions to our tax-exempt investment vehicles (401(k) and pension plan) in mutual funds. We have to invest now in those, while the ability to receive the tax deferral still exists. However, on advice of an investment advisor, we are holding non-tax exempt cash we would have otherwise invested into the market in short term CDs. When we spoke with him this past spring, he felt the market was too volatile to offer good suggestions of...
How amazing to have a 100% employer match! I hope you will maximize the "free money" the employer is giving you. In making selections, I also recommend the Morningstar (morningstar.com) ratings. They are well regarded and have a pretty simple 5 star system which they use to rate mutual funds. In selecting funds, one big consideration is the amount to divide between foreign and US mutual funds. I believe most advisors are now recommending that 20-30% of the stock...
"Well, I thought my husband (before we married) was being serious when he said "one of us would stay home if we could afford it." I thought he was giving serious consideration to something I said was important to me. I thought he meant our goal was to be able to afford it, and we'd work on that goal." Have you maximized your earning potential? In high school/college did you pursue the training needed to make sure you could afford a home with a SAHP, or did you...
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"What a perfect example of misunderstanding where Steiner is coming from. That entire set of books (all of the ones with titles like from _______ to _________ are based on conversations he had with the workmen who were building the Goetheanum. They are filled with crazy stuff like that. Do anthroposophists treat every word of these casual conversations as exact prescriptions to be followed to the letter? None of the ones I know do. Which doesn't mean that there aren't some...
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