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Posts by bczmama

"I guess it just doesn't seem to be such a threat to me to have people thinking they know stuff that I don't or being unable to explain exactly what it is they are doing. I would be more inclined to worry if there was some sort of violence being directed at my child." I've been following this thread with interest, and I must admit this is a viewpoint I have a hard time understanding. Would you be comfortable with having your child enrolled in a school where they were,...
I'm curious. Do you think that within the next 5 years (before your eldest leaves for college) you're going to be able to get divorced, find someone else, marry him and have your kids (as adolescents) establish this magical relationship with "replacement Dad" that you feel they are missing now?
"I think you'd be less stressed if you stopped trying to regulate your dss. For better or worse, he's a young adult now and is going to do what he wants whether you "let" him or not." So long as he does it in his own space. You give up control when you don't cover your own room and board.
"In the end of the upper secondary school there are tests that determinates your ability to continue to upper education paths. You can't just walk in university, no matter how much money you have, you have to get through university tests + have good grades." And we think the testing for NCLB is bad. This is my problem with the more typical european system. From what some British friends have said, there doesn't seem to be a good way for those that slacked off in high...
Actually -- For me, the biggest thing given up was DH having the ability to take early retirement. Also given up (or changed) was the extent of travel we planned to do after retirement and maybe our experiences while traveling (things can be a little different doing them in your fifties versus sixties). I also gave up a very good paycheck and "lost" in a sense all the time, energy and effort I put towards building a career -- from the time I put in studying for the...
Slate reports on a new study... http://http://www.slate.com/id/2151538/
Its interesting how both the Middle East and the West have chosen the treatment/status of women as being one of the key ways to establish their "differentness". The West wants to show that is more equal, more just and more enlightened, and the issue of women's rights is a way to accomplish that. No wonder that the most extreme examples (honor-killings and fgm) are seized on. The Middle East wants to show that despite any embracing of modernity -- through western...
The idea of planning anything around TLE seems a little extreme to me. Remember y2K? Or some other gems of past prediction: The battle to feed humanity is over. In the 1970s, the world will undergo famines. Hundreds of millions of people are going to starve to death in spite of any crash programs embarked upon now. -- Paul Ehrlich - The Population Bomb (1968) By 1985, air pollution will have reduced the amount of sunlight reaching earth by one half..." Life...
Sounds like the cure for this issue is nothing that is being discussed here, but rather marriage counseling to help them work out issues with regard to compromise. Divorce has harmful (and better documented) effects on kids.
The reality is, is if you wanted to have a dialogue about the issue, this is not a very good way to go about it. The issue is going to be drown out in the whole "did he or didn't he" debate especially if this man was well-respected/loved in the community. People who might otherwise come to this issue with an open mind may decide to reject/downgrade the problems out of loyalty to the deceased, and taking sides may kill any meaningful debate. I've seen just that outcome...
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