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Posts by FireFrog

Thank you both! That is what my gut was telling me, too, but it seems so soap opera. Who does this sort of thing in real life?   You are completely right, artekah, about knowing if this were a problem. DH actually said that if she is doing anything, isn't causing any problems. And to be honest, we know where she is all the time, so I know there a very few opportunities for her to do this anyway. And all of her friends are decent kids.
My husband just received a text on his phone from a number we don't recognize. The texter claims to be a friend of our DD, age 17, and they want to remain anonymous. In the text this "friend" says that our DD is doing drugs and alcohol and they are so worried.   Now, our daughter isn't a saint, but she is really together overall. She carries a 4.3 GPA (honors classes), is very involved in extracurricular activities (theater), has many art/craft projects she works on...
I am so grateful for this thread! Thank you for posting it bass chick!!   Our 6 yo DS still won't sleep on his own and I was worried we were alone in this. I appreciate Peony bringing up anxiety -- I'm not sure I would have made the connection by myself, but once you said it, it clicked. Our older DD is being treated for anxiety and panic attacks, and both DH and I struggle with our own anxiety issues, so it would make perfect sense for DS to have it, too. I think I...
    Wow -- I read this and starting crying. Partly because I am sad for your DSS, but mainly because I am so impressed by how loving and patient you are. Your empathy for this sweet little boy will go a LONG way towards healing his emotional wounds.   I just wanted to tell you that I, a perfect stranger to you, think you are an amazing person! I will keep you in my thoughts -- it is a tough road ahead for you, but I know you and your DH can do it!!
I, too, second erigeron. Those are the true choices, but none of them will fit you. Only you know what will fit you in your "spirit", "gut", "heart," etc -- whatever you want to call it. Having my daughter when I was a teenager, barely out of high school, with no way to hold a job, all on my own, was certainly NOT the logical thing to do. But I knew that I would not be able to live with myself if I terminated the pregnancy. I knew in my "heart." But I considered it,...
Some of this does depend on which state you are in. In California where I live, abuse/neglect really are the only reasons to decrease visitation. Week on/week off is not the only way that parenting time is split. My ex and I split the week, 3 days with him and 4 days with me. Then he had DD one weekend a month to balance out the time.   One way to avoid the week on/week off would be to make the agreement with him in advance. The court usually goes with what the...
Unfortunately, most courts would probably not place a high priority on your son meeting his sibling. In fact, most courts place the highest premium on the relationship a child has with his or her parents. That being said, I understand your desire to have him there, and I agree with the pp about your best bet -- follow the school calendar of the local district.   Your best recourse to his wishy-washy behavior is to do what you said -- follow the court order exactly....
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I'm in a similar situation, but my DD is a bit older (16 in two weeks). One thing that helped is DH taking a child development class for school. It helped him to see what the normal stages in general are. Also, going to therapy helped quite a bit, as well.   Will your DH read any books or go to a counselor? Or if you go to church, maybe the youth pastor.   Another "neutral" third party might be your DD's teacher. As a Middle School/High School teacher myself, I...
The concerns of your DSS are considered important, at least here in CA. Actually, what you are describing is very close to why I retained a lawyer and sued my ex. The court listened to DD, especially because 13/14 seems to be the age when kids are taken more seriously. Especially if they are articulate and can explain their reasoning without much emotion. I really encourage you to support him in speaking up for himself, especially if it has to do with his own lifepath...
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