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Posts by Cornelia

I come here *so* infrequently, I don't know if you even want to hear what I have to say. But, living this same journey, I thought maybe I could offer some experiences of things that help me survive. First and foremost, we learned 4 years ago that getting away sometimes is vital for me. At that time, we were dealing with PTSD with attachment issues but not RAD. Still, I learned that I needed to take nights off when the pressure inside of me reached a boiling point. ...
Going through ICPC as I type this. Waiting for our state's ICPC approval which is pending recieval of the written TPR order. Adoption case worker took vacation 12/21 to 1/6. Her assistant was supposed to get that sent while she was gone. Waiting to hear if she did and how long case worker's paperwork will then take.
Going through ICPC as I type this. Waiting for our state's ICPC approval which is pending recieval of the written TPR order. Adoption case worker took vacation 12/21 to 1/6. Her assistant was supposed to get that sent while she was gone. Waiting to hear if she did and how long case worker's paperwork will then take.
First kid came home and freaked out. Seriously, he screamed bloody murder at the lab and wouldn't let anyone touch him. Took a month before he'd let us take any blood from him. I got a urine specimen. His toddler brother demonstrated 5 times what I wanted while he stared at me like I was nutso. I finally bribed him. I bought him a bottle of Sprite in exchange for a cup of pee. But, he would NOT be convinced to give me any of his stool. No way, no how, too darn...
Number 1 sign of an attach disordered child is that mom looks crazy : I have said on more than one occasion, its NOT me and I can PROVE it. I have 5 healthy, normal children including another older adoptee. If *I* were crazy, then this problem would encompass all of the children, not just the one. Our oldest is Desta's age. He's been home for 4 years. And, he's still behind academically. I actually feel better reading your post. We've continued to homeschool...
WACAP has 2 subsidy levels. They have waiting child subsidies in all of their waiting children. And, honestly that is not uncommon. Holt, Bethany, Spence-Chapin, AIAA, Pearl S. Buck, Gladney and many others have a waiting child subsidy program which typically does include older children. Basically, the larger and more established an adoption agency, the more likely they offer subsidies for waiting children. What is different about WACAP is their Promise Child...
Neither DH nor I were adopted or ever spent time in fostercare. But, we both have adopted siblings and experience with foster parenting in our homes growing up--if that counts for anything.
See, in our case, I'm just MUCH better working with older kids than babies and toddlers. I love my babies and toddlers. But, a child screaming incessantly who cannot understand what is going on eventually gets on my nerves. I struggled with colic twice and nearly lost my mind dealing with it. It was much easier to show a child where the bathroom was than start changing diapers. It was easier to dialog with a child and explain what was going on than it was to integrate...
Absolutely true that 'special needs' is a catch all phrase and can mean anything under the sun. But, with WACAP specifically, the no cost adoptions are called Promise Children. And, they always have significant issues, most commonly medical issues. Its not a bad thing. One of our sons was actually represented by WACAP, which I discovered when friends told us they saw him in their WACAP newsletter because we weren't adopting through WACAP. He had significant medical...
We took a LOT of flack for setting up clear boundaries from the get-g with our older boys. And, I do mean a LOT of flack. We established rules from the day the children entered the home. We explained the rules ONCE, and after we had explained them, we held them to those rules. Gently yes, but also firmly. I think that advice is right on the mark. Another consideration we took when adopting a much older child but we did with both of the boys even though the second...
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