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Posts by Tigerchild

  Are you saying that every fertile woman should feel guilty over every period she has because of the loss of the existence of the child that might have been conceived?  I find that point of view terrifying in its implications (and yes, I know there are people out there that feel it).
I didn't perceive any "anger" on MM's part--though I will admit, I did get quite a bit angry at a 1 post person attacking her for being hostile.  MM's question was valid.  Adoptees have had uncomfortable moments too, when posts were getting booted to "Personal Growth" (and to a one everyone I talked to about it felt insulted when their post was moved there), and we were always reminded about the clarification of the boards purpose.  I would say it is not inappropriate to...
I am not a letter writer or a caller, to be honest.  It's something that I really struggle with.  So FB has actually helped me connect more than I would have otherwise--I message family members/old friends, we chat on the chat window, ect.  I get to see tons of pictures of my cousins' kids.   I embrace the age of the internet though.  I met my DH online, we were friends for years before meeting face to face and it was pretty much definitely love at first sight.  We'd...
This is an adoptive and foster *parenting* board.  Not a generic adoption board.  Sometimes this has led to hurt feelings, but this is not an all-triad all-things-related place.  Adoptees may not post whatever they like here.  PAPs may not post whatever they like here.  Birth parents cannot post whatever they like.  MM is perfectly legitimate in expressing her views here.  When you are seeking to find out more about the process of how to be a surrogate solely from that...
  Unfortunately for your viewpoint, what the parents think (birth or adoptive) doesn't mean the adoptee will feel the same way.  Nor does it guarantee that anyone's feelings and/or "ideology" won't shift over time with life events.  Boxing people in, and demanding that they decide between either or, and thinking that it's just all a matter of ideology?  Now *that* is hostile nonsense.
  I did not say only time EVER.  I said, in the context of this conversation, where we're talking about children either bringing a specific nut item to school to eat or noshing while running around on the playground, I did not think that there was a situation where a child was going to die if they didn't eat their nutty food where there wasn't a better substitute.  I'm familiar with type 1 diabetes, I have cared for children with it and grew up with family members who had...
   Oh for pete's sake.  Yes, over time, if a child is starving themselves or is unable to derive enough nourishment from what they eat (it's not always a picky eater/small group of foods thing, lots of absorbtion/digestion stuff out there too).  For anaphylaxis, that's damn near instantaneous, you don't have an hour or two (or a couple of days) to balance it out and get more food into the child or (let's hope, if we're talking advanced starvation here) get access to...
You're in a hyper-intense period right now.  While I never added in an older child to the mix, the year of having 3 kids under 2 was very very difficult in my marriage.  I was sure we were going to be over;  but I'm glad I listened to another friend who said to not make any permanent declaration or decision until things had evened out with the kids.  Even the best relationships (DH and I had an almost fairy tale romance and marriage as far as nauseatingly wonderful and...
Given that you said earlier that you haven't even brought up this idea of yours to her yet, I don't see how YOU can possibly know "what she wants" in this situation.  What people say they want in theory vs. a specific situation is often very different.  Lots of people are open to adoption, esp. a healthy newborn.  Most will not want to adopt a baby from a close friend by friend and husband specifically "for" them.  We've come a long way in removing the squick from...
I do not send my kids to school with nut products, nor do we eat overtly nut products during breakfast on school days.  There are two highly allergic children in my boys' class and while they're older now and very knowledgeable about how to protect themselves...when I was a preschool teacher I had to use an epi-pen on one of my students because another student's parent sent them to class with a handful of peanuts in their pocket (despite the fact that we had repeatedly...
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