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Posts by greenemami

I haven't read all the replies- I am expecting my second child and have dd + dsd (nearly half the time) at home, so we are not a large family-but it does irritate me is when moms of more tell me what an easy time I have of it and how they can't imagine what I do all day, etc.-I think we all deal with our own situations and don't deserve to feel belittled or like we shouldnt' be able to vent/complain to other moms. I bet there are people who have it a lot harder than...
well, what are your concerns about having his friend over? My kids are quite a bit younger, so we are just getting into sleepovers etc., but yes, we would let dsd have a friend to sleep over as long as the parents were comfortable with it. Would you be more okay with just a night versus the whole weekend? AGain, I guess I would need to know what your hesitation was before offerring any advice. I see that your dh wouldn't actually be there-is that the problems?
I don't know about what you should do, but I would suggest that if your dh decides against the counseling, to be careful how he words his refusal. You seem suspcious of her motives, and this sounds like the kind of thing that she could get in a front of a judge and say, well I tried to work with him but he wouldn't even do counseling, etc., etc.. Just something to consider, especially since she frequently has her lawyer communicating with you.
well, I would just explain it to her in real terms like you said-dd has known that she has a vulva and a butt since she was probably 1-since i have been pregnant, I have explained that the baby comes out through my vulva and the mommy has to work really hard to get the baby out. Recently, I explained that part of the vulva is the vagina and that is what opens up so that hte baby can fit out. She says that the vulva will open wide and the baby will come out-and also that...
Quote: Originally Posted by doulatara Yes to this! Also, to be fair, I assume you knew all about your dsd before you partnered with her father, so this stuff is just part of the territory. I am not saying it doesn't effect your life or your kiddo's lives, but there is not so much that can be changed about it now. Instead perhaps try to focus on the positives...does she ever help you out with entertaining the kids? Can she be seen as a role model of...
Quote: Originally Posted by aricha I totally agree that the effects of divorce and joint custody on the "full-time kids" often gets overlooked. When we moved and changed custody schedules, we put a LOT of thought and work into helping my step-daughter make the transition, and it wasn't until my son (2 1/2 at the time) started showing signs of pretty serious stress, that we realized we needed to put just as much time and energy into HIS transition. I...
lol-thanks! No pressure indeed Thanks for the encouragement though, sometimes you just need to hear it out loud-yes, in general we all have a very positive relationship and dd adores her big sister and loves when she is here-it is just me who can see the changes and I tend to get frustrated about it, although this is all happening in my head, definitely not to dsd or dd-although dp has to hear about it sometimes, lol. That is a great point about her processing...
Not sure what to call this-our dd has started playing a new game based on her big sister (my dsd)-she pretends to go to school and then announces that she is coming home because it is "mommy's day" to have her I really worry about the effect that the blended family dynamic has on dd and soon to be ds (due in less than 1 month). I think it is so obviosly hard on the child traveling between houses (and I am certainly not trying to minimize that) that we forget about...
I guess we are in the high end here-dsd just finished the book series and she is just over 8.5-I guess she started them around 8. She saw the first 2 (maybe 3?) movies but said she didn't want to see the rest because the movies were a lot scarier than the books. She has always been fairly sensitive to scary scenes though. I personally would wait until your kids can read the books first-the movies were pretty intense in parts and I think it helps to have an understanding...
well, I don't have any direct experience with this, but from what I understand, it is VERY hard to change custody unless there is proven abuse/drug abuse, etc. unless the CP agrees to the change. I would start documenting everything you can and maybe ask a lawyer what they think. Also, you (the stepparent) being home in the afternoon will probably not be a valid argument in court-your dh (the bio-parent) would have to be the one who was doing most of the care. I do...
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