DS's friend killed in tragic accident

[Anglyn]

THis 15 year old boy died sunday when he wrecked the ATV he was riding. The funeral is tommorow, the day after that is/would have been his 16th birthday. My 17 year old with him just minutes before it happened.

Im dealing with my grief and trying to help DS with his and these overwhelming feelings of helplessness that threaten to turn me into the overprotective mother from hell. Seriously, I dont want him to leave the house anymore, AT ALL. I know this isnt reasonable and Im trying not to let it affect everything but its hard.

I posted about this in the preteen/teen forum as well.

[rachelle-a-tron]

Love to you, your Son & the Family of the Boy who died.

[Ruthla]

[chaoticzenmom]

I can't imagine. You be an overprotective mother for awhile if it helps. I'm so sorry for all of you

[rainbowmoon]

I'm so sorry. Just try to breathe and take life a day at a time. It's hard not to panic but you'll get through this. Does your DS have a counselor at school (if he goes to public school that is) he could talk with?

[meemee]

mama your siggie says it all.

it is one of the scariest aspects of parenting.

could u talk to a trusted listener? or just to yourself and hear all your fears.

i know there is two parts to this. one your grief. the other fear for your son.

like pp said breathe, breathe, breathe...

this is v. raw. i am sure your son himself is thinking of how close he could be to death. this could be a real wake up call for him.

can you talk to him from your heart? can you tell him how you feel and how more you want to protect him. i dont have a teen yet so dont know how to approach me. but i have found - talking from teh heart - never hurt anyone. as long as you are coming from a place of connecting with him and not from a place of judgement - kwim. he will understand if you try to hold on to him.

all you can do is hope and pray and/or do whatever that things will be ok. that's all there is to it really. have trust and faith. i cant imagine what else you can do.

mama

i am sorry for all the pain.

[hollytheteacher]

so sad

[Norasmomma]

I am sorry for your son and the boy's family.

My DH had a similar experience when he was about the same age. He was downhill skiing at our local hill with his friend and his friend veered off into the woods and hit a tree. DH was the first person on the scene, and he says he still remembers that he knew things were really looking bad. My DH is alright, but I know it still can be a little strange for him when he talks about it. He tried to do CPR and help him, unfortunately his friend suffered severe head trauma and passed after being on life support for a little while. Very sad, I remember the accident happening because I lived in the same town.

What a sad, hard experience for your son. I hope he will be alright, just be there and be supportive of him.

[Ifluffedthree]

I am so sorry. This surely is very painful for all. Such a tragic, young loss of life. HUG

[shayinme]

[Anglyn]

Thank you all for the responses. He doesnt seem to want to talk to me much about it, but does talk to his friends a lot, they all knew each other, its a small town we live in. Im respecting his need for space while letting him know I am availible if he needs me. I wish there was something I could do for the family but I know that at this point, nothing really helps.

[meemee]

how are YOU doing and how is your overprotective mamaself doing?

[AntoninBeGonin]

[mama2toomany]

I am sorry for the loss of your sons friend. Its so hard. be gentle with yourself and your son, all the feelings are completely natural and the fear does get a little easier every day.

My brother drowned, and to this day I still feel a shocking panic whenever my kids go in a pool or lake. Its always there, but it gets easier.

Hugs to you mama! Your in my heart, thoughts and prayers.

[Tracy]

oh, hugs, hugs, hugs... to you, your son and the family of your son's friend.

Can you do something for the family? It might help.