Waiting 3+ mos to ttc? Wanna start a group thread?

[osker]

Hi!
Heather and I have been ttc for almost two years now (off and on) and are currently waiting three months to try again because we have to travel to New Orleans next summer and don't want to have a baby down there (or be travel restricted, it's a very important trip).
While we're waiting, we're trying to focus on getting healthy, losing weight, taking vitamins, cutting out coffee, doing yoga, meditating, etc... BUT! We're not having much luck getting motivated to actually do those things! Anybody else out there waiting a few months to ttc?? Wanna start a group to keep ourselves going while we wait? I'm reading this great book that lays out different activities to do every week for 3mos in order to be super fertile by the end of it. The first week talks about drinking hot lemon water and doing yoga. Anybody here wanna be involved? Keep me on my toes? Give me more of a reason to stick to it? I could share what the book says every week and we could talk about how tough it is to be waiting.

Interested??

[knittinanny]

Hi there! I'm in the midst of about a 3 month wait myself. DP and I are going to start TTC in March. We have a lot of things to think about before then. I'm trying to start exercising more regularly, remember to take prenatals and B complexes, etc. It seems so far off yet (and not at the same time) that it's hard to stick to it.

What's the book you're reading? Hot lemon water and yoga? Any particular kind of yoga? I take yoga classes a couple of times a week but they're just regular old classes taught at the gym. I can do lemon water though. What's it supposed to do?

[osker]

Hi!
The book I'm reading is called Fully Fertile by Tami Quinn (plus other people, I think). It gives you overall thoughts on healthy diet and lots of specific yoga things - I think their background is as a yoga studio, then they moved into yoga for fertility and then chinese medicines and mind/body stuff all encompassing fertility. There are assignments for every week, the lemon water is the assignment for the first week of twelve, it's supposed to cleanse the body if you sip it every half hour all day long. I'll look at it when I'm home tonight and see what the specific yoga stuff is, if there are names for moves or something. I'm new into the yoga thing, so I'm not even sure if I'm talking about it in the right way...

[milletpuff]

I'd love to! We are going to start trying in May or so for our first. I was reeeeally focusing on getting healthy but got a little derailed with stress. I would love a group to check in with!

[iemaja]

Ooooooooooooohhhhhh I'm in! Great thread. :

We're going to start TTC next summer - just in time for the scorching desert temps! Though this might be pushed back till fall because DP (who will TTC first) is training for a marathon.

Osker, please do post the tips and we can talk about different ideas for how to work toward healthy bodies for conception. We've been eating MUCH healthier over the last couple of months and we've never felt better. It's always great to learn more.

I love pilates and would love to learn more about yoga. Why do the authors root their book in yoga? Are there poses that help with TTC?

[osker]

I was looking for images or something online from the book and I came across this study guide for a group based on the book! I got my book from the library, do you guys know if you would be able to get it from your libraries? Then we would all have the book and could read it and see the pictures, etc...

There is a yoga routine for flexibility in the hips, I think, and one for hormone regulation/ thyroid type stuff. Unfortunately, I really know nothing about yoga and wouldn't know how to describe the poses (is that what they're called?).

[knittinanny]

My library is crap. I might buy the book, though, cause it would be fun to have a little 'study group'. The internet also told me that Tami Quinn has a yoga DVD about fertility yoga. All sorts of other folks do, too. I might check a few of them out. I have a list of supplements and things too that I made a while ago. I'll find it and post them.

I'll be in for some serious getting-ready-to-TTC action next week. Thanksgiving has taken over my life/brain this week. :

[Monarchgrrl]

HI there!

I'll join. We're probably waiting about 2 years. Not exactly sure yet. I'm starting to get into yoga. I have a bad knee so I can't do a lot of poses, but it's still nice. We've been (really recently) eating healthier and walking every morning together. We skipped today, though. Not sure why.

Our plan is for me to carry DW's eggs. We've got to save up some money first, for that plan. It will be exciting if it works, though! I definitely need to lose some weight first, but I'm not stressing about it. If it happens, it happens.

That book sounds great. I'll probably check it out.

[knittinanny]

Ok. Thanksgiving done, now I can focus on baby-makin'.

[QUOTE=Monarchgrrl;12688553]

Our plan is for me to carry DW's eggs. We've got to save up some money first, for that plan. /QUOTE]

Monarch, we're thinking of trying that too. Is there a clinic near you that does a trade-off for IVF costs if you donate eggs? That's what we're looking into right now. We have a meeting set up with them in January, but it seems like we'd get free IVF treatment (would still have to pay for sperm, meds, etc) if we donate our eggs. DP actually wants to donate as many as possible since he's not planning on ever using them, and may have a hysterectomy at some point.

Osker, where did you find the study guide?

I have no idea if this will work, but here's a link to the google document I've been working on that lists a bunch of TTC supplements, what they're indicated for, and where you can find them. I think I've set it so other people can add things as well.

[Scalpel]

Some might think we are crazy....and then again they might be right!!
DP gave birth to our daughter 3 months ago and today I have our initial consult our RE's office for myself to possibly begin TTC this summer!! Since going through the journey with DP we both know things can take some time but we have already decided that we want our children close in age so here's to the future.......

[CrunchySmurf]

I'd like to join -- we've got about 9 months to go though (August '09 will be our first try), is that too far out?

When we set our goal last spring, we set it for 15 months, so we're now very close to halfway. The past 7 months have FLOWN. I anticipate the next 9 will as well.

We have various reasons for setting it that far out, but the primary one is to get me in optimal health -- so you can see why I would love to be part of this group! I haven't heard of this book, but I have several other fertility books on my Christmas wish list. If we decide to do this as book study type group, I would be willing to get the book.

[osker]

Hi everyone! Wow! Thanks for joining the group! I'm excited!

Let's see if I can organize my thinking here for a minute...

Kittenanny - awesome google document! We have one that we've put together for the development of each week of pregnancy, but as we're not there yet it just sits waiting.

Scalpel - yay for kids close in age! I think it's great! Get all the diapers over with at once! Welcome!

Crunchysmurg - Welcome to you too! The time before you start trying will just fly by, you are right!

Monarchgrrl - 2 years prep is awesome! I'm jealous of your ability to get out and walk every day. Our lack of motivation for exercise is definitely a great problem for us!

iemaja - I am definitely going to hook us all up with thoughts from the Fully Fertile book soon... I'm in the last two weeks of my semester right now, so apologies if I don't get to it just yet...

milletpuff - I hear you on the stress! yikes! I try to set little goals for myself each week, but I also try to forgive myself if I don't reach those goals!


Okay, this is what I've got for you guys today:

Week 2 is deep breathing (in through the nose, pause, out through the mouth)

Week 3 is healthy eating, good carbs, good fats, low sugar, cutting out caffeine (i'm trying too... it's not going well on the coffee front)

The book is from the group at a place called Pulling Down the Moon in Chicago. That's where I found the study guide as well.

My goals for this week:
Stop drinking coffee entirely (and come down off caffeine with the help of excedrin)
get outside for exercise at least once (yikes, I'm embarrassed that I need that as a goal : )
try out the fertility yoga with my lovely wife Heather

Heather's Goals:
journal about physical health/symptoms to create a baseline for ttc months
increase fresh produce eating


That's what I've got right now...
Where is everyone else this week??

[Monarchgrrl]

Thank goodness Turkey Day is over. Whew! I bet I gained 5 pounds! Dinner last night was pumpkin pie. Ugh!

The goal was to walk every day. We only actually made it ONE DAY! But it's a start and we can only do one day at a time. We got a late start today, so it didn't happen. Tomorrow for sure...

kittinanny- we have a great clinic near us but we haven't asked about donation of any of our eggs, though. I would love to be a donor, regardless of us doing it or not, but everything I've read says they want only those up to age 29. I'm 31, and DW is 33, so that won't work. I'm not sure any clinic would want ours. That's awesome that you're going to try that route, too!

[milletpuff]

Osker, how many weeks are listed in that list? I like both suggestions so much. I'm going to start right on with the breathing -- I'm sure it will help in SO many ways. For a while I was waking up in the morning and having a little two minute ritual of setting the intention of the day, but that went out the window fast when things got super ramped up. I'd love to return to it.

I'm just trying to get through finals. How do people make any plans at all with this whole "life" thing??

I'm super excited to be here too!

[osker]

Milletpuff - there are 12 weeks in the cycle, but I have yet to make it past week 3! We actually had the book before our last try in July, but of course thought that we wouldn't need it because that would be our cycle... now since we know we'll be on break for a while we're going back to it.
What are your finals for? I'm working on my doctorate in psychology, so mostly I have papers for the end of the semester. Ugh!

[milletpuff]

Duh, yeah I went and reread your first post, oops I was also confused and I guess too lazy to post-stalk you -- are you planning on both carrying at the same time? Or just one?

Mmm, doctorate in psychology! My undergrad degree was in sociology (uh, quite a while ago) and now I'm taking an odd assortment of classes for a career change -- spanish, business finance, financial planning and tax prep. I am DEFINITELY not taking this much next term! When are you done?

[osker]

Our plan is for Heather to carry first. We ideally have always wanted four kids, spaced not too far apart with Heather carrying the first, both of us carrying together (pseudo-twins) for the middle two and then me carrying the last one...
We're the types that do everything together though, so I'm quitting caffeine in an effort to show moral support? I guess... and I just feel tired of coffee and tired of the crash when it's been a while since you've had a cup...

That is an odd assortment of classes. What are you planning on doing with that?

[milletpuff]

That's sweet! My DP has no interest in quitting coffee or carrying a kid, but she's quite the support team in every other way. I like that we have another uterus to fall back on if something doesn't work with me, but *both* of us would really rather not do that -- I can't wait to be pregnant and breastfeed, it really doesn't appeal to her AT ALL.

As for what I'm going to do with all my classes, the answer to that is part "I'm not sure what it's going to look like yet", part "it's a long story" and part, well, financial advocacy? Oh yeah, and then there's going to be baby in there somewhere? Or two?

[knittinanny]

Milletpuff - financial planning and advocacy? Come be my financial planner and solve all my problems!

Osker - What are you writing your dissertation on? I miss academia!

Monarch - Is there a way of incorporating walking into your daily routine, like walking somewhere you'd normally drive or take the bus to? Not sure where you live or what the transport situation is. I walk A LOT here in London just because you have to take public transport everywhere, and invariably the bus you need is two blocks from where you are.

My goals for the week/end are to make goals for the next few weeks. Can you tell I'm a list-maker?

I bought the Fully Fertile book but it's not arrived yet. I've been drinking lots of lemon/ginger tea. Not sure if that's close enough to lemon water to count.

Can I ask everyone something else? Have you started to make plans for after the baby is born as far as working/staying home? I'm trying to figure out what we're going to do and it just makes me stressed, worried, and sad.

[osker]

Milletpuff - financial advocacy sounds great! Do you think you would want to work with individuals or businesses? I've gone off my typical psych stuff in the last few months to wondering if "financial psychologist" would pack more of a punch.. working with people on why they can't get their finances to do what they want, you know? Probably won't go that direction, but it is interesting to think about!

Kittenanny - yay for buying Fully Fertile! We can take a hack at it together! My dissertation has changed several times since I started school. I came into it knowing exactly what I wanted to do... and then haven't done a lick of that! Originally the plan was to work with families of intersex kids, and I still lean in that direction in my dreams of the perfect career. However, practicality has gotten in the way of that dream and I've now moved on to a dual research project working with parents. Part of my dissertation is (paid) community needs assessment to determine what mental health needs parents in an under-served rural community have for their kids. The other part (unpaid, ugh) is my more interesting spin on that to look at barriers to help-seeking, i.e. what keeps parents from getting the help that their behaviorally challenged 0-5 year olds may need. At this point I'm about six months in and have yet to see the light at the end of the tunnel! This sure is a long road!

In terms of kiddo care down the road, it really depends on when we actually succeed at this crazy game. If we get pg in Feb (as we're praying for) then the baby would be due this time next year... At which point I would be still taking classes (though they are only one day a week) and busy interviewing for internship as well as working 20 hrs a week, flexibly, depending on which practicum position I end up with for next school year. At that point, Heather would take the baby to work with her for the times that I couldn't be home (she's a nanny for now 18-mo twins, they would be 2 1/2 at that point). If it takes much longer to get pg, then I would be on internship (hallelujah for paid work!) and Heather would be able to cut back her hours to stay home with the baby while I work. She's been supporting both of us for the past three years while I've been in school, so she can't wait until it's time for her to stay home with a baby! (I can't wait either!) It all really depends on when a baby actually decides to join us, so we'll wait and see. If we, for some reason, needed someone to help care for the baby then we would hire someone to come to our home and help out, but hopefully that wouldn't be for many hours of the week!