ttc question

[osker]

Hi dads,
I'm not sure if this is okay for this section, but I thought it kind of fit. My wife and I are trying to get pregnant (with frozen swimmers, we're both women, she's carrying) and we're disagreeing on the plan. She wants at home, no doctors (which we've been trying for a while) and I want her to go to the doctor and have some tests run. I get that it's her body and she should be able to choose, but this is my family and will be my child as well... shouldn't I have some say? What do you guys do if you disagree with your wife when it comes to baby carrying decisions? Does she get veto power because it's her body? Do you get a vote as the other parent of child-to-be?
We talk about this all the time but have come to a point where she is stubbornly saying she doesn't want to go and I am stubbornly saying that she should.
What to do?

(Thanks Dads, sorry to crash your party! Feel free to tell me if you think this shouldn't fit here.)

[kriket]

have you checked out the Queer parenting? I'm sure you have. Also, if you are in the TTC forum talk to Stevi she is a single mama who tried frozen for 2 years and didn't get PG until she found a fresh donor. Just food for thought! Good luck!

[osker]

Thanks Kriket, sometimes I feel out of place in the ttc forum because we can't just "babydance" and hope for the best, you know?
I'll check it out again though!

[smartycat]

there is a thread in queer parenting about the "non-bio" parent that might be a good place to ask this question. Many women there have been on both sides of the fence and could help enlighten you.

[plunky]

I do think the person carrying the baby gets veto power. But exercising that power indiscriminately can lead to nasty feelings.