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so what happens when you retire w/o enough $ ?

post #1 of 24
Thread Starter 
I keep reading the scare stories about folks not saving enough for retirement, and I keep wondering: well, what happens to them, then? My understanding is that most people DO save enough to pay to live in their own home and then 18 months (average) in a nursing facility before death. And the people who don't save enough, will qualify for Medicaid to pay for that same nursing facility (or at least similar - I've heard that you "get what you pay for" in terms of nursing homes, but the Medicaid-paid ones pass licensing so they can't be that awful, right?).

So is the value of saving enough, that you get slightly better nursing home care in the end? And that if you save a LOT more you can travel etc more?

Is there any real risk that folks who don't save enough, won't have anywhere to go? It's not like the elderly are dying in the street, is it?

I guess I'm confused by the scare stories. Sure, Medicaid wouldn't work if we ALL depended on it, so "they" (whoever "they" are) want most of us to pay our own way, but there's no real danger to individuals so long as the herd in general saves, right?

(And no, I'm not using the availability of Medicaid-funded facilities as an excuse not to save, I promise! I save 30% of my net. )
post #2 of 24
My "plan" is not to save (I barely make enough to survive now) but just to work til I die. My family is set up that the kids take care of the parents when needed...I took care of my dad until I couldn't (he lost his foot and has too many other problems for me to physically do the work) and he's in a nursing home, but my mom is 72 and *just* got laid off, and she's going to live with my brother. When all of us get old, the kids will take care of us like we did our parents. IMNSHO, it's the way it should be if the parents aren't able to save.
post #3 of 24
There is no "retiring" if you haven't saved enough money.

People with no savings work until they are too sick to work anymore.

Often they do not have adequate medical coverage either, so when they are too sick to work anymore, they are very close to dying.
post #4 of 24
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by Crunchy*VT*Mom View Post
People with no savings work until they are too sick to work anymore.
But when they are laid off or fired, and their kids won't take them in, where do they go if they are healthy? Their income is gone and they can't keep their home/apt - then where do they go? Do people like that just move into nursing homes paid by Medicaid?

Originally Posted by Crunchy*VT*Mom View Post
Often they do not have adequate medical coverage either, so when they are too sick to work anymore, they are very close to dying.
So the nursing home, or hospital, both state-paid?

I really want to know. i keep hearing about this "crisis" (not just now, but for the last decade), yet I don't see long lines of people waiting for hospital beds; the homeless elderly don't seem to be greatly increasing in number. Folks who haven't saved must be going SOMEWHERE. (If this sounds snarky, I admit a personal reason for asking: my 71yo retired, toxic mom hasn't saved enough, I strongly suspect, and I do NOT want to be tapped to pay for her care. But I course I wouldn't wish even her, let alone non-toxic strangers, to die on the street.)
post #5 of 24
I googled "state assistance elderly" and found links to a lot of government programs for the aging and destitute.

If you've paid into Social Security you will expect payments from that when you retire (unless of course the system goes kaput by the time you retire!) For some people that's the only retirement they have, and they manage by subsisting on tuna fish, but it's not a great living. I think my grandma got Social Security through her deceased husband (she raised seven children with him and I don't think she worked outside the home), and she also picked up odd jobs for as long as she could (babysitting/nannying, etc.) and then just lived in her little hand-built house until she was too ill (mentally and physically) to live alone at which point my parents brought her to live with them. They had her Social Security and Medicaid to help them, as well as assistance from Easter Seals, but they still had a LOT of expenses as her care became more demanding.

I think if my parents had been unwilling or unable to take her in, and/or had been unaware of her worsening condition, she would have just died a decade or so earlier, and from complications of blood pressure and Alzheimer's (she stopped remembering to take her meds near the end of living alone) instead of peacefully of old age in a bed surrounded by family.

I think the concern about "not saving enough" is mostly about the desire to retire in your sixties to a standard of living not too far below what you are used to, and being able to live comfortably that way for thirty years or longer.
post #6 of 24
They live on SS, which almost certainly won't be around for out generation. There are a LOT of elderly people living in slums and eating cat food. Be glad you live in an area where you don't see this.
post #7 of 24
Depending on where they live, they often freeze to death in the winter because they can't afford heating costs. When I lived up North, I remember hearing of quite a few deaths.

They often go hungry as well. (Just Google Elder Food Insecurity.)

They often have to choose which meds to take or take them on a rotating basis which does not help their chronic medical conditions.

They can become homeless.

post #8 of 24
Here they tend to die of heat exhaustion rather than freezing.
post #9 of 24
Thread Starter 
Huh. I wonder if "they" will really be "us, or at least people we know" in 40 years or so. I know a LOT of 30-40yos who have zero or very little retirement savings. Huh.
post #10 of 24
My ex-FIL is a good example.

He never worked at any job long enough to get a pension. When MIL left him 3 years ago, he was 69 years old. He gets around $800/month in Social Security. That is IT. MIL always made more.

He teaches a few hours a week now in a community education program, so he might make an additional $200/month doing that. Let's say his income is $1,000/month. He's on Medicare.

His kids helped him get susidized senior housing; he has a 1 br apartment that costs 30% of his income ($300). Out of the remaining $700 or so, he has to pay everything else. He has an ancient, paid-for car, so he has to pay utilities, car insurance, gas (if he drives 5,000 miles a year I'd be shocked, so it's not a lot of gas ), prescription drugs, food, etc.

Subsidized housing is how the elderly who are able-bodied and able-minded, but are poor, survive. He COULD get heating assistance, food stamps, etc. I don't know if he does--when he was married to MIL although they often qualified, he was too proud to let them get a lick of help. We were all shocked when he accepted the subsidized housing when they split up.

So there's one example.
post #11 of 24
Let me just say, as someone who used to volunteer in nursing homes in high school ... nursing homes that were the cheapest options available ... I will go jump off a building or use my gun on myself before I live in one.

I come from a European background. In my family, if you need help - you move in with your kids. This is the norm. In return, you do what you can, i.e. childcare, cooking, etc. But, really, if you can't do any of that - it's ok. I remember growing up in Europe - I lived with my mom, my grandparents, my great grandmother, and it was GREAT. There was always someone with whom to play.

Anyone, I digress, lol.

I was shocked when I started volunteering at the nursing homes. To me, it looked like a fate worse than death. These facilities were awful. Bad food, cramped space ... and all the people just looked as if all happiness/life/joy left them. Which is not surprising considering the conditions in which they lived.

I'd take a box under the bridge before I ever went into one.

I just feel really sorry for all those people who have no other choice, and are forced into such a facility. I know they have some great retirement communities ... but those are pricey. I'm speaking of the facilities for which medicare or medicaid will pay.

I would not count on this as my retirement.

My plan is this: savings, and pretty much working until I die. That's my partners plan too. However, we both have "jobs" which we LOVE, and are very passionate about. We NEVER want to retire - what we do brings us way too much fun and joy. Why would we want to stop.

Honestly, I don't know what people do who have little or no savings and a job they don't love.
post #12 of 24
my mil lives in low income housing and gets social security and food stamps.
post #13 of 24
A couple of important facts: You can't just 'check into' a nursing home, they're going to require you to meet some criteria as far as needing around-the-clock nursing care before they put you in a bed.

Moreover, before you qualify for Medicaid you have to show that you are sick enough to qualify -- just being infirm and no longer able to safely able to live in your home isn't enough to qualify for Medicaid. So it's entirely possible to be elderly, unable to safely live in your own home, but not able to live anywhere else. It's scary. This is a good reason to start looking into Long Term Care insurance before you get too (ie. 65+) old.

Generally, people who don't have enough savings that their savings + social security can find their lifestyles don't retire until they can no longer work. The problem is that if you get to a point where you physically can't work but you're not sick enough to need full time care -- "I'll work until I die" is a really bad strategy for retirement for that reason.

Personally, DH and I are making appropriate 401(k) contributions and will have some assets as an inheritance before we retire. We're planning on changing careers and working part time to supplement savings, as well as living in a home that is designed to be age-friendly and cheap to run. Hopefully, savings plus social security, if it exists, will keep us from being a drain on our children as we age.
post #14 of 24
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by Belleweather View Post
The problem is that if you get to a point where you physically can't work but you're not sick enough to need full time care -- "I'll work until I die" is a really bad strategy for retirement for that reason.
Okay, now I finally understand! TY.

(I'm sure I'm not the only person who was confused and even a little resentful, thinking that we were saving "properly" while those who weren't - like my own mom - were going to have retirement funded by the rest of us. Yes, flame away. I posted because I wanted to know more, y'know?)
post #15 of 24
Well, we will definitely have enough for our retirement. We just never want to quit working as we love our jobs! Not to mention, when we die, everything will go to freeze us cryogenically. Hey, we're atheists, it's better to have a Plan B, no matter how far fetched. So, on the flip side, our kids better not expect anything from us when we're dead. Cause it's not happening, lol.

On the other hand, I have no issue with helping my mom out. She was diagnosed with MS late in the game, and her medicine is very expensive. I don't think there even is a generic alternative for what she injects herself with - and, even if there was, I wouldn't let her get it. She's my mom!

Anyway, I think the work until you die is a good idea IF your work can be done from home. That way, in case of disability ... you can still work. Otherwise, yes, savings are very important.

Unless you're in Europe - then, you've got the family system in place.
post #16 of 24
[QUOTE=Belleweather;12698270]A couple of important facts: You can't just 'check into' a nursing home, they're going to require you to meet some criteria as far as needing around-the-clock nursing care before they put you in a bed.

Exactly. It's not as easy as you think to get into a nursing home with Medicaid generally you have to be admitted to from a hospital with doc orders saying you have to be there, etc... Medicaid pays them far below what their operating costs are for the patients. If I'm remembering right from when I worked in one, Medicaid has a max limit for how long they will pay for nursing care home, meaning after a certain point the facility gets no money for that person. They can't kick you out though.

We are looking at this situation with several family members. My grandmother, an old neighbor of DH's that is like his father, and his parents. We already support the neighbor, we can't support anyone else. We can't support him forever, he is getting up in age, and is getting close to not being able to work, I don't know what we are going to do with him. He doesn't have health issues to get him into a nursing home, but is losing it mentally, not Alzheimer's though. It just makes it really hard to deal with him because you can't reason with him.
post #17 of 24
Here's a good comparison IMO. My grandmother is in a medicare funded nursing home. She's been shuttled back and forth between there and the hospital bc the two argue about how much care she needs. She hates the food, has a terrible roomate. I mean, the place reminds me highly of the hospital were DD was born, only I had a private room and my gma has to share hers; and it's shabbier and the attendants surlier (sorry to anyone who works in one, I know it's a hard job, and some are great--see below--gma's place just sucks). And she's there until she dies; I was only in for 3 days. She can't cook, can store less in the way of possessions than we take on vacation. She has no money, never saved much/any money, did some stupid things with money. (OTOH, she never learned to balance a checkbook, my grandfather didn't think women should handle money).

In contrast, my husband's grandmother lives, at 90-something... 93 I think... in an assisted living facility. When/if she needs full time care, she can move to a different wing of the same facility. She spends a month or so in her retirement community in Florida (used to spend half the year there). She has her own 2 bedroom apartment, her own furniture and decor and treasures. There are pull bars and "need help" cords in every room though. Someone comes by in the morning and helps her remember which med to take when. She has to put a "gone to bed" sign on her door at night and remove it in the morning or else the staff will knock, and if no answer, will come in, to check on her. Staff is like a friendly hotel desk staff, not luxury, but kind. She has friends and regular grocery store runs she can choose to do or not. She can eat in the cafeteria (I think they pay, but maybe not) or she can cook for herself or go out to eat with her son or a friend who can drive. She and her husband saved, budgeted, were careful with money. She gifts all her great grandchildren with great starts to their college funds.

It's very very sad, bc I see my parents hurtling toward the same situation my grandmother is in all around. They don't seem to get that retirement and life and health in old age could mean anything more. In their minds, they'll be in their own house, a retirement community, or me, the only solvent child, should take them in. That last will not be happening. I don't have the space at all (2 kids, 650 square feet; so I mean it literally) and I don't have the emotional energy or desire to deal with their unaddressed medical issues (mom has anorexia; today she said she was too full for dinner because she "shared some of DDs apple." That was 1 bite-- smaller than the baby takes, literally.) and their racism (Let's not discuss what my dad and brother had to say about our next Pres. shall we? I've never heard such crap from anyone but them and my grandfather, ever!)

Me, I expect to follow in my GMIL and MILs footsteps!
post #18 of 24
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by EviesMom View Post
Here's a good comparison IMO.
Thank you! That too was very, very helpful. I have visited folks in the second kind of place, but have never seen the first first-hand. That sounds like reason enough to keep saving!
post #19 of 24
I think both of my grandmothers would fit into this category. They both received Social Security benefits, etc. The first grandma mentioned also used the food stamp program and the commodity food program.

One grandmother continued to live in her home until her death. It ended up being a very dangerous neighborhood in an inner city area by that time.

The other grandmother lives in a very rural area and is now living in a very nice subsidized apartment complex for the elderly. She has a small one bedroom apartment with on-site laundry and is really very happy there. She socializes with her girlfriends daily, is taking an exercise class, and very active and healthy.

I believe both used/use Medicare for medical care.
post #20 of 24
My father took his $ when my parents divorced and moved to Thailand. Now he is over their looking for donations and helping children. He is spending his time helping people.

So thats always an idea. Move to someplace where your dollar will go a little further.
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