Do you ever feel like you chose the wrong "pill"? - Page 2

[MamaEli]

He that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow.
Ecclesiastes, 1. 18

Not to offend, that's just what went through my mind......

Oh, the grocery machinery, money money money.
My friends in Kenya ask me, why are we having so many miscarriages now? Why are we getting cancer? Why are we getting diabetes? I'm pretty new to TF, but I think I know now.
I went shopping lately at a store I don't usually go to, a little cheaper one than the one next to my neighborhood. I was amazed that their packaging now reads, "All Natural" on almost everything. But when I read the ingredients list, I'm like, mmmm, no. Or, "no trans fat." And everyone buying these things thinks they're getting a good, healthy product. I posted a week or so ago even how at Costco I picked up the cheese and it had fricking artificial color in it. Or the ads for HFCS.
And have you all seen this one? First page ad in Fortune this month----cholesterol lowering milk! http://www.pura.com.au/pura_brands_heartactive.aspx
My son's friends come over and won't have dinner with us unless its mac and cheeze, pizza rolls from a box, or premade peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. (so they never eat with us, and that makes him so sad.) Honestly, they don't even KNOW HOW to eat unprocessed food. And that saddens me.....
We have a long way to go at our house, I'll be the first to admit, but we're getting there. Baby steps.

Oh, and what else is frustrating is if I was to get into a conversation with someone about, saturarated fats for instance, I can only imagine the voices in their head...."Yeah, she LOVES her butter, that's obvious. I'll stick to my SmartBalanceLite and keep my size 6 jeans, thankyouverymuch." So I'm not the greatest poster child for an unconventional style of eating. I was talking to another mom about how her husband has such bad GI issues after eating grains, about soaking them. Some of the other moms heard us, and you could just see the wheels turning: "Us, take dietary advise from you? Yeah right! "

Ahhh, so anyway, I'm rambling.
Wrong pill, maybe, but then I'm getting more and more used to being outside the norm.

[Theloose]

yes, yes and YES

I feel so much weight on my shoulders to get dd healthy - and even dh has trouble seeing any of her 'symptoms' as problems (how do we know mushy poop isn't normal for a 2yo?) And then there's the problem that we're not seeing any obvious progress, so I just feel kinda like a lunatic...

What am I doing about it? Telling my friends how xxx is good for you because it has yyy, every chance I get without sounding like a broken record. And I'm about to start a program to get a M.S. in nutrition and I'm thinking about becoming an IBCLC - so I can be a professional expert on food sensitivities in nursing babies and tell new mothers what foods are important when it's so critical to know *and* I have their full attention.

[AJP]

That's the irritating thing about knowledge, you can't make it go away (short of brain injury, I guess), even if it becomes uncomfortable. I don't think I have the one and only true path to nutritional nirvana, but I feel sad and sick thinking about so many millions of kids growing up on, and adults subsisting on, almost totally vacant calories. But I'm not a nutritional evangelist. I only occasionally offer a comment if others bring the subject up, and otherwise just try to be an example. I'm not apologetic about the way I eat and feed my family, but I try not to come across as judgmental of others' food choices, even if I'm thinking it, and especially when I know they haven't made a conscious choice but are only doing what they do out of habit and familiarity. Some people feel judged just because someone else is doing something different (same as with vaccine choices, birth choices, etc.), but I can't control that. It can be incredibly frustrating, but I can't imagine choosing the pill of ignorance.

[dancebaraka]

Oh Mamas!

I am at best a part time, moderate TFoodie... is there such a thing?
But whether I am eating traditional or post-industrial-modern () that particular moment, I refuse to digest guilt and shame and anger.

We do the best we can with what we have.
My husband's Taiji Master grew up during the revolution and famine in China. There were many months where all he had to eat was sweet potato. He is one of the healthiest, most peaceful, most elegant and cheerful men we know. I think the human body is a mystery and feeds on energy as much as physical nutrition.

The angst and guilt around food we are all discussing here is as much a modern phenomenon as transfats, IMHO.
So big hugs and wishes for peaceful meals to everyone here.

[JTA Mom]

Originally Posted by dancebaraka

Oh Mamas!

I am at best a part time, moderate TFoodie... is there such a thing?
But whether I am eating traditional or post-industrial-modern () that particular moment, I refuse to digest guilt and shame and anger.

We do the best we can with what we have.
My husband's Taiji Master grew up during the revolution and famine in China. There were many months where all he had to eat was sweet potato. He is one of the healthiest, most peaceful, most elegant and cheerful men we know. I think the human body is a mystery and feeds on energy as much as physical nutrition.

The angst and guilt around food we are all discussing here is as much a modern phenomenon as transfats, IMHO.
So big hugs and wishes for peaceful meals to everyone here.

Yes, this! There are so many conflicting ideas about what is 'healthy'. To be honest, humans are omnivores, and, depending on genetic background, certain diets will be 'healthier' to them than others. So while I may do better without grains or dairy, another person does best on an almost all dairy diet (like the Masai). I try not to worry about others' diets, unless they mention certain issues cropping up. Of course, the super processed modern diet is horrible, no doubt about that. If my grandmother wouldn't recognize it as food, then it ain't food! lol

Ami

[425lisamarie]

Well this is timely. I think about this often, though I truely *hate* the preachy type. I try (and I'm pretty sure I don't come off as) to not sound know-it-all and snobbish about food, but really I just try to make sure my kids understand about good food and shelter them as much as I can .

They are 2.5 and 4.5 so I know I cannot do it forever. It's funny because I just came down to check the computer for the last time since putting my 4.5 year old to bed. Before he fell asleep he said, "mommy, tomorrow for lunch I want chicken noodle soup, I loooooove that stuff." (we are going to the local good grocery with really nice lunch food and to get more cod liver oil. It made me happy and I almost fell asleep and couldn't get back up. I've had a long week with thanksgiving and crappy eating and kool-aid with my sister and her body building boyfriend (who strangely enough is the koolaid addict.) DS asked him if it had food coloring in it because food coloring makes him act crazy (true, no lie)

I am not a preach about my good food and why everyone else should eat this way. But I *DO* cook well, very tasty food an I have non-picky happy and healthy kids. Chubby by these days definition, but healthy and happy. Soemtimes I get in to a rut and wonder "why the hell do I go through so much trouble to make handheld potpies with thanksgiving leftoveres?" when I can just buy the 2 for a buck type things? Well, when my kids says he wants to eat my freakin chicken soup because it's sooooo good. I must have done something right; because he gets his share of crap on saturdays at grammas (and by crap I just mean packaged bread and ice cream).

[avent]

I agree there's no one standard diet everyone should follow, once a person moves into the realm of natural and whole foods. I think it's easier to articulate what people should not eat (artificial trans fats, HFCS, etc) than what they should eat.

[wagamama]

I totally feel the same thing -- immense pressure to feed my children well, and yes, it stresses me out. And it's so hard when you are constantly "fighting" the food culture all around you. DS first tried white bread at around age 3, at someone's house. Now whenever he sees it he clamours for it. What am I supposed to do? We had two birthday parties on the weekend, and again, I don't want to be a spoilsport, but handing a bag of candy to each kid as they walk in the door? Can't the cake be enough? People are so unaware.

Plus there's the whole issue of knowing what is good for you, like raw milk, but not having access to it. We live in Nigeria, and raw milk can give you TB, so no way. It's extremely frustrating for me to not be able to give raw milk to my kids.

But ... I am still so grateful that I found this forum two years ago. Our diet is much better than it would have been. I'm so happy every time I give broth to my family. ANd CLO/BO. And pastured chickens -- I get them from the local market. If I hadn't known about TF, I would have been buying them at the supermarket like any other expat. So I am trying to remind myself that I am doing my best and trying to feel grateful. And DS isn't so awful -- he eats brown rice every day, loves fish and miso soup. And my whole family loves my chicken noodle soup.

[leila1213]

Watching our kids eat homemade chicken noodle soup! That's about as close to nutritional nirvana as it gets!

[DesertMommy]

Originally Posted by avent

I am secretly jealous of people who don't know, parents who heat up a mac and cheese dinner in the microwave, grab some conventionally grown baby carrots from a bag, dump 4 cups of white sugar into some water with a Kool-aid packet and are done with dinner. Plus they get to feel good about it because they mac and cheese is fortified, the carrots are healthy, and the Kool-aid has Vitamin C so it's just like fresh juice, right?

Wait, how do you know my mother-in-law? Oh no, you're not talking about her, she doesn't do baby carrots she does can of corn.

[1littlebit]

i feel you completely! no one believes me when i tell them what we eat! seriously! Mamaeli tell your margarine loving size 6 friends to come talk to me... i eat real butter and my pants are smaller then theirs!

people just look at me like i must not be able to read or something ... 'you dont really eat like that" its like they think i am confused and the red lid is skim milk.. in disguise. and i can't really cook with lard. lard? do people make lard? is that like the atkins diet? oy. and you talk about soaking grains and they are goners.

[JTA Mom]

Originally Posted by 1littlebit

people just look at me like i must not be able to read or something ... 'you dont really eat like that" its like they think i am confused and the red lid is skim milk.. in disguise.

Yep, those darn skim milks, so sneaky. Turn your back once in the grocery....

Of course, you might be pulling a prank on them, pretending to drink whole milk, cooking with lard (really, it's shortening--soo much better, no sat, fats! ), etc. Maybe they're waiting for Ashton Kutcher & the cameras.

Ami

[Junegoddess]

I'm sooooo with you, mamas (and mama-to-bes, don't mean to exclude). Some days I wonder why I took the red pill. (Was it red? I think it was.)

I've always been a questioner, though. Darnit. I like being on the fringe, I guess. It is a lot of work, though. And my kids do NOT like a lot of things. Very picky. That said, while we were traveling last week and really needed McDonalds for lunch, so we could use the PlayPlace, my daughter refused to eat her fries "because they aren't healthy." She also threw a fit when one of the McDs didn't have regular tea (only sweet tea, we were in Tennessee). She won't drink pop, because it's unhealthy. Granted, this same child lives on candy for days after Halloween... so she's not fully brainwashed. But I was 24 years old before I was willing to listen to the possibility that pop might not be an integral part of the food pyramid. She's 10. That's progress.

I really wish I were a better poster child for this way of eating. But I'm not. I'm 40+ pounds overweight, allergic to everything, have a clotting disorder, elevated blood pressure, borderline-diabetic blood sugars, weak nails, split-ended hair, dry eyes, am a mouth breather, and apparently my uterus has become the Womb of Doom. Gee, I wonder why my friends don't want to emulate my diet? I do, however, feel much better than I did when I was 25. I'm 31, so I guess that says something. I like to hope that I'll be fully healthy before my children are grown.

I tend to get obsessive about it all, and I know that's not a healthy attitude. A donut eaten with peace and love is probably more nourishing than homemade chicken soup eaten with anxiousness and worry. But my ongoing health problems have made me gunshy. I keep trying to perfect my diet... maybe if I eat more sweet potatoes or less starches or more seafood or... add allergies in there, and the constant worry that perhaps there are more things I'm allergic to... UGH.

So, yeah. I'd like to shin-kick people who blissfully eat whatever, whenever. And I admit to not preaching much at all, because... if they are happy, I feel I ought to leave them that way.

[Ruthla]

Originally Posted by JTA Mom

If my grandmother wouldn't recognize it as food, then it ain't food! lol

I think I'd have to go back to AT LEAST my great-grandmothers. My paternal grandmother died when I was an infant, but I understand she wasn't much of a cook, working full time a the family store and having little time to cook. She relied on a lot of take-out and prepared foods when my Dad was growing up.

My maternal grandmother never really learned how to cook. Grandpa did most of the cooking- a mixture of wholesome fresh ingredients and prepackaged convenience foods. He learned to cook in the US Navy during WWII using such things as powdered eggs and canned milk, although he did use some fresh meats and veggies.

I'm thinking that in NYC 50-70 years ago, food processing was well on its way and traditional cooking methods were already being lost.

[avent]

I only have to go back to my grandmother (and my parents until they reached their 20s) since they lived in the "third world" country and everyone ate TF.

[OvenSeeksBun]

I feel this way all the time... much more so since discovering MDC. This forum has opened my eyes to things I had never even considered about mainstream North American culture. Sometimes I think ignorance would be so much easier, because all of this information (diet/nutrition, natural living and on and on) can be so overwhelming at times.

On the other hand, I feel very lucky that I've begun thinking of these things at my age (23) because I know that if I lived in ignorance until I was 40, I would feel so much regret for all of those years that I had "lost", you know? I also feel blessed that I have a chance to make changes to my life (and body) before I bring children into the world.

[LionTigerBear]

Originally Posted by dancebaraka

Oh Mamas!

I am at best a part time, moderate TFoodie... is there such a thing?
But whether I am eating traditional or post-industrial-modern () that particular moment, I refuse to digest guilt and shame and anger.

We do the best we can with what we have.
My husband's Taiji Master grew up during the revolution and famine in China. There were many months where all he had to eat was sweet potato. He is one of the healthiest, most peaceful, most elegant and cheerful men we know. I think the human body is a mystery and feeds on energy as much as physical nutrition.

The angst and guilt around food we are all discussing here is as much a modern phenomenon as transfats, IMHO.
So big hugs and wishes for peaceful meals to everyone here.

Yes yes yes.

I used to worry quite a bit about it and eat REALLY carefull-- expensive foods I didn't even like-- but not anymore. I still try to eat more TF than not, but I think it is JUST as important to feel at peace and relaxed about food. The energy is SO important.

[AJP]

I feel at peace and relaxed about the food my immediate family and I eat, we enjoy what we eat and I'm willing to do the work of making it. It's everyone else I worry about. And I feel anger about how manipulated our society is by the food processing industry and giant agribusiness, with government agencies as their tools.

[La Rune]

Yes and no! I don't know! Sometimes I wish I didn't know what I do, other times I'm glad.

I just wish I could stifle my reaction, and not cringe when my SIL says her toddler eats healthy food. As he's toddling around with a bag of whole wheat goldfish crackers and a "100% juice" (reconstituted, plus HFCS, of course) pouch.

But that would probably mean not knowing as much as I do, and I wouldn't want to go back either.

Oh yeah, my MIL's "healthy snacks" for my nephew are laughable too. Lowfat prepackaged rice krispie treats. Sugar-free Jello. 100 calorie packs of pretzels. I want to tell him "NOOOO, don't eat it!" :

[leila1213]

Originally Posted by AJP

I feel at peace and relaxed about the food my immediate family and I eat, we enjoy what we eat and I'm willing to do the work of making it. It's everyone else I worry about. And I feel anger about how manipulated our society is by the food processing industry and giant agribusiness, with government agencies as their tools.

What I'm even angrier and more scared about is the speed with which we/they are obliterating the health of every traditional population on the planet.