: Still in the thick of custody war over here, too. just wanted to empathize with all the other mamas (lilyka, mountain, Seie) who are being sucked alive of their energy where that is concerned. We've gotta be strong. sigh.Anne2008
, .....-what Danishmom said. Everything she said. Ditto.
Can I just say that I have given 22-23 year old guys chances left and right this past six months, and I am so exhausted with young men? Good freakin' god. I cannot seem to get a real adult man, in his thirties, to save my life. I just want someone born in the '70s, that's all!!!!!! Why is that so hard? There are gorgeous men in their 20s throwing themselves at me left and right, the most common age seeming to be 22, and I look at them like they have two heads but they are so certain that they think the woman who appears to be about 26 or 27 in front of them is their dream lady. However, I'm actually 29, and someone born in the same year that I started 1st grade just seems ridiculous to me. I could have been their babysitter when I was 13-14. Is that crazy for me to think that way? It's not just that younger men are ...well, younger, but they are so quick to fall in love, and it's so irritating. Also, they get nervous around me, and start acting all weird, and i feel sorry for them and it's just.... UGH, I want to date an adult, that's all. Someone confident and collected, and sure of himself, and established in his life to the point where he is comfortable and peaceful and happy, and just finds all of that goodness multiplied when he considers adding me into his life somehow.
Seie, Holland73 is really right on the money. You and I are both the same when it comes to falling in love. We just want to throw ourselves into it body and soul and somehow by sheer will of desire MAKE it last forever, because it feels like it should. But maybe that's just how we fall in love--10000% percent, ready to commit and make it work out for the long haul. However, somehow that gets entangled with a huge pile of fear. That, what if it doesn't work out, no matter how much we wanted it to.... will that hurt so badly that we are incapacitated by the thought of dealing with that kind of pain and end up just totally motivated by fear in our dealings with the man in question? That's not a happy, peaceful place to begin a relationship or even continue a new relationship. It's great to fall passionately in love, but to also be at peace with letting it unfold however it's meant to, because of timing and circumstance. Life is such that no matter how strong the feelings are, sometimes outside influences (or simply personality traits coming to surface in the other) are able to sabotoge things and it doesn't work out. Luckily we are not given one chance at this in life. There are many people on this earth we can feel passionately in love with, if one has a relaxed, open, happy, at-peace-with-whatever-happens sort of attitude which will make it easy for the universe to throw someone into our path.
After getting my heart broken in December, I have thrown myself into socializing and going out with girlfriends. Finding and making new girlfriends, as well. I now have a tally of up to 8 women that I have in terms of local Helsinki friends, which is not bad since I just moved into my apartment 2 months ago, and moved to this town 3 months ago. I'm also letting a 23 year old paramedic take me to dinner and a movie tonight, after making him wait 2.5 months to see me (my heart got stolen shortly after he met me and I blew off his correspondence all that time, but he was patient). I have no interest in him. God he's young. But, I need to get the Hell out of my apartment and speak Finnish, and he speaks Finnish with me, so.... there ya go. I'm going. And afterwards there is a party on a boat that I am going to attend, solo, and who knows who I might meet there. Off to decide what to wear....... something slightly slutty, but slightly innocent and girlish, too. Hmmmmm...... Danishmom gave me a short wooly red plaid skirt that does the trick every time in terms of that combination.....