NOVEMBER '05 Mamas' and Babies' December 08 thread - Page 2

[*Amy*]

Originally Posted by MelW

I get the sense that having an un-named baby is a bit stressful for you?

Heh - does it show? Yes, I don't know why. My pregnancy journal is pages and pages of angst about baby names! But (drum-roll please) I think we are like 99.9% settled on Owen so I can stop bugging y'all about it now! Yay!

Mel, your cards sound beautiful! So crafty and special!

[spughy]

Well I liked my IUD just fine, but it's gone now and I'm ready to accept the consequences! Susannah, I had one before I got pregnant with Rowan, and it was great - it saved our early relationship because I have pretty much the same issues as Helen.

Gunter, I don't think I could have removed it myself because my doctor had a heck of a time finding the strings. Rowan played nurse - she had her 3-year checkup at the same time - and she was so sweet, holding my hand saying "It's ok mama, I'm right here" while I was all "OW you're poking my cervix!" Our doctor is really cool and didn't mind Rowan watching over her shoulder (or under, as was probably the case).

So the IUD's gone, no real trauma, Rowan is a completely healthy and developmentally appropriate 3-year-old (38" and 29 lbs if anyone's keeping track - 75th and 40th percentiles, I think? but the doc said she's getting new, better WHO charts within a year and Rowan will be closer to average on those.) I love our doctor - she does a very practical "developmental" exam by asking kids to take off their shoes and put them by the door. If they can manage that (assuming relatively easy shoes) and ask for further instruction if necessary, they're all good, and the kid doesn't even notice that she was examined! Rowan took off her shoes, then asked "Do you mean here beside my mama's shoes?" and then aligned them very carefully beside mine. After that it was all height, weight, eyes & ears and did I have any concerns? nope? good, let's haul out that IUD. Oh and she did the stethoscope things too, which Rowan found pretty entertaining.

Oh Helen - I just noticed you said coil? I had a t-shaped IUD, I don't know if that makes a difference, but I never had any excess bleeding issues, even in the first month after insertion. Oh, wait, I got it inserted about a year before my period came back. Nevermind.

[MelW]

Originally Posted by *Amy*

Heh - does it show?

You did start a thread about names as soon as our DDC opened up, have posted there regularly, plus started a couple of spin-off threads and polls

A potty-learning question for everyone... Neela has been out of diapers during the day consistently for about a year, and very few accidents since the Spring (as in I can't remember the last one...). When she came out of day time diapers, I quit using cloth since we were doing coin-op laundry and it cost more to wash one or two diapers than just to use sposies.

So we've been using a diaper at night ever since, though lately she's been arguing about it and telling me she is a big kid and won't pee in her diaper. As long as she's in a decent mood at bedtime, she's pretty good about taking a pee before sleep. She's dry in the morning about 2/3 of the time. Last week we almost ran out of diapers, so used the same one for about three nights in a row. She pointed out to me that she wasn't peeing at night anymore and shouldn't need to wear a diaper.

My biggest issue is that she sleeps on a futon that we can't put a waterproof cover on (and if I put a pad under her she kicks it off the bed during the night). So I negotiated with her that she could start sleeping in her bed (which has a cover on it) during the transition time to no diaper at night. I explained why the bed was easier to clean, and she seemed to get it. She asked for one last night on the futon, and told me she would sleep diaper free on the bed starting tonight.

Last night she was over-tired and grumpy at bedtime, and refused to pee before bed. I put on the diaper as usual, and it was soaked in the morning. Should we still try this? I'm worried that I'm being lazy about the diaper and that it's for my convenience rather than her need. But I really don't want to deal with wet sheets several times a week. And I've occasionally forgotten to put a diaper on and cleaning pee off the futon is a really big pain. Ideas??

[*Amy*]

Originally Posted by MelW

You did start a thread about names as soon as our DDC opened up, have posted there regularly, plus started a couple of spin-off threads and polls

I know - I'm a freak! : And the ironic part is that the name we've finally settled on (after four months of stressing about it (on my part)) is the name that I said I wanted in that very first post back in August! Duh. I should have just stuck with my instincts and saved us all a bunch of annoyance!

Aaaaaaaanyway. As for the potty learning issues, we are right there with you. Brynn is doing the exact same thing. We don't have a mattress protector on our bed, so she has to wear a pull-up if she sleeps with us. The one night that she slept on her mattress without a pull-up, she peed THREE TIMES, so we were up all night. That was a while ago (probably 2 mos) and we haven't tried it again since then. She does wake up dry maybe 1/2 the time, but I'm so not wanting to wake up and have to change pee-pee sheets on the bed, etc. So we're just hanging with the status quo for now. I don't really know what else to do. :

[MelW]

I was tempted to vote for Calhoun on the name poll on your blog, Amy. Calhoun's is a 24 hour coffee shop in Vancouver where I used to occasionally hang out and study when I was in university. A 24 hour coffee shop that served beer, but only if you also order food. So a cookie (or whatever the cheapest "food" item) and beer it was!

Neela just told me she doesn't want to sleep in the bed. It's filled with stuffed animals and she hasn't slept there in months. So we'll stick with the futon and a diaper for now.

[lovetobemama]

2 thoughts:

1. I LOVE the name OWEN! I've only ever known 1, and I don't think it's getting too popular at all...just familiar now, which is a good thing, in my book.

2. I am voting for the BIG V for our DH's. I feel like I have given my body enough for our fertility, birth control, pregnancy, labor, nursing, all of that....and I am tired of it being MY responsibility to keep us not pregnant. (and usually only having choices that have health risks, even if they are small, along with them). DH hasn't pushed me or anything, and in fact we are in a agreement that it is time to give my body a break from messing with cycles, hormones and everything, and it is NOT ok for me to have to abstain when I am most interested in sex with NFP.
In short, I will get off my soap box, and am IRL not an over-the-top feminist or anything, but is it just me that finds it fishy that, other than a vasectomy or condom, almost all other forms of birth control fall on women!!?


Lastly, I am totally bummed because I am just starting to get to know you guys, and now I will be MIA for a week. AT&T was supposed to change our DSL plan, and instead accidentally terminated our DSL contract completely. So we are without internet. And, what took one button click to undo, apparently can't be fixed for at least a week! They can't even tell us why it will take a week.

Anyway, I am at Starbucks, paying $3.99 to log on and tell you all that I'll see you in a week.

So, anyway, I may be back before then if I go stir crazy and make a return trip to Starbucks, but, if not, see you in a week!!

Emily

[Queen of Cups]

Hello, ladies! I really should be going to bed right now, but I just had to post about how wonderful it to meet barcelona and Gunter! Finley is just the sweetest little boy, the pictures I've seen of him absolutely capture his sweet spirit! barcelona was getting ready for her show, so I didn't get as much time to hang out with her, but she has a wonderful presence about her. (Killian said his favorite person was her DH, though - he just loved him!) Gunter and her family are all beautiful and full of life and I can see why Gunter is a doula - she has an amazingly giving, encouraging spirit.


Here are the three DDC "babies!"

And here are the three mamas!

It was so much fun meeting up! I hope I have the chance to meet more of you wonderful mamas someday!

[spughy]

I'm glad your meetup went well, barcelona QofC and Gunter!

I got a call from my sister this evening... my mom is in the hospital. She has some kind of ventricular tachycardia, but they don't know *what* kind. So she has all kinds of things hooked up to her and she's kind of grumpy, and she may end up getting flown out to Vancouver for surgery. She says not to worry but I can't help it. I know that she is otherwise fit and healthy and apparently there's nothing wrong with her arteries or anything but I am still worried.

[Kavita]

First of all . . . Yaaayyy! I have my laptop back!!! Glad though that DH took the extra time to make sure that everything on my harddrive was retrieved and backed up--as they replaced/reformatted it. :

I'm totally jealous of the meet up, Gunter, Q of C and barcelona. I actually considered trying to drive to join you guys and even mapquested it but it's just too far and at an awkward time for me. However, barcelona, since you said that you were going to be in Tenn, let me know where, and I may be able to catch up with you there and definitely you're invited here--not too far from parts of Tenn . . . .

I am still recovering from the Thanksgiving holiday festivities. I don't want to post all the gory details but I'll just say that the dinner was good and this year I brined the turkey and it came out really well. It was still a little stressful because my advance preparing the week before was interrupted and severely slowed by the sprained foot/ankle, but I managed to pull the whole thing off anyway, even if it ended up still being a lot of work and more stressful in some places than it otherwise would have been because stuff got left to the last minute. And my mom was difficult to be around, and my sister got terribly sick, and Ella got really sick, and the kids were really wild, and we ended up having to go and rescue my sister on Sunday after they were about an hour out and drive her part of the way back to MI, which ended up taking far more time than it should have because we got stuck for an hour at a complete standstill on the freeway due to a total closure of the highway due to an accident. So the whole thing ended up with us being on the road (including stops for lunch and dinner) for ten hours!!! So I'm still tired and recovering, and feeling like I'm (hopefully) fighting something off myself.

Meanwhile my dad is scheduled for surgery tomorrow--so I am feeling a bit worried/nervous about that. It's a plastics procedure--they are doing some scar release from the burns and a bit of grafting and reconstruction on part of his face/lip etc. They would normally do it in an outpatient surgery center but because he's a bit more medically complicated they are doing it in the hospital, but hopefully he'll be able to go home and not have to be admitted/stay. Please keep him/us in your thoughts though!

Amy, I like Owen. It was immediately my favorite of all the other names you posted. Especially William--not because I don't like the name, but because it cracked me up imagining you running into your ex-husband sometime, and doing that thing we do of telling your ex how great life is (without him) and how well you are doing (without him), but then telling him that you have a wonderful husband and two lovely children--and then your first born son is named after him! LOL!

Emily--hope you get your internet access back quickly!

Mel--my only idea about the potty situation is offering her the choice that if she doesn't go potty at bedtime, she has to sleep on the bed that has a cover or wear a diaper on the futon. That gives her some choices but keeps your futon dry! Once in a while I make Ella wear a pullup just in case, like if we're sleeping in somebody else's bed, but for the most part she is dry at nights and very rarely has an accident.

Amy--at this point I'd just be glad that Jason didn't get a vasectomy the first time you both insisted you were absolutely done having kids. Otherwise, you wouldn't be having OWEN, you'd be having NO-ONE!! Lol!!

ETA: spughy, I hope things go okay with your mom. Keep us posted!!

[flapjack]

Spughy's mom. Get better soon.

(it is actually a copper T= the RU486, if you want to get specific. Aaargh. I've never wanted my period to come so much just so I can get it over and done with.)

Jenn, gorgeous pictures

Mel, I'd stick with a pullup for bedtimes, maybe look at moving back to cloth (I don't have a problem with washing soaked pee nappies with the main load) so the waste isn't an issue and go with the flow. Both my boys regressed with night-wetting the year they turned 3: when they first came out of nappies they were always, always dry but then it slipped. FWIW, though, we're letting Skye go back to nappies if she wants to because she's flatly refusing to put poos in the potty- I mean, she's done TWO.

Kavita, I hope your dad's surgery goes smoothly tomorrow. : I hadn't realised he was still dealing with the repercussions of the accident- it's hard to believe that's more than three years ago now. Gentle healing vibes to all of you.

[Kavita]

Originally Posted by flapjack

Kavita, I hope your dad's surgery goes smoothly tomorrow. : I hadn't realised he was still dealing with the repercussions of the accident- it's hard to believe that's more than three years ago now. Gentle healing vibes to all of you.

Yep, it's pretty much been a total lifechanging event. He lost part of his left arm, due to the severe damage they couldn't save it and had to amputate, right below the elbow. He has a lot of other scar tissue along the left side of his body, too. So now, after this length of time, he has been unable to really get to use a prosthesis in part because the mobility of the residual arm is hindered by a band of scar tissue. And there are some issues with his lip/eyes, etc. He's still on a lot of meds from the time of the accident too, including some for pain. And, he has gotten pneumonia several times since then too. They think that he may be aspirating food/fluids, and that this and/or the damage to his lungs from the accident itself is causing him to get pneumonia. He is doing pretty well overall, considering, but he's had a lot of medical monitoring and so on since. Strangely enough, though, his personality has changed so much that in some way it's been really positive--he is so much more loving and mellow, really appreciates things and looks on the positive a lot more. He could be really difficult and angry before, so actually my sister and I really like him more and have a better relationship with him now! I hope the surgery goes okay--it's kind of nervewracking. It sucks too because my mom and sister are both sick, so pretty much the whole clan is impeded now!

[*Amy*]

It's my baby's birthday!!! : and :

It's crazy to think that exactly three years ago, I was lying in an OR recovery bed with a bitchy nurse by my side while Jason and Brynn were up in the nursery. In fact, I think it was right around 6:30am that she was FINALLY brought back to me (after almost 2 hours!!) and we nursed for the first time! That was the point when they wanted to take her back to the nursery because of "hospital policy," and I said, "Well I'm her mother, and MY policy is that she stays with me!"

So this morning I got up a little early to make her a special breakfast and then we'll open some presents before we head to school where she will have a birthday celebration in class.

This afternoon I'm actually meeting with the HB MW that we will likely hire (Jennifer, FYI Kavita) so that's not very celebratory but today was the only day we could both meet. Tonight, we'll probably take Brynn out to do dinner of her choosing - I'm guessing she'll pick a bagel at Panera.

Jen, thanks for posting the pictures!! This computer won't load them (gr!!) so I'll have to try to see them from another computer today. I'm so glad you had fun!

Kavita, best wishes to your dad today. I hope everything goes smoothly. And about the vasectomy comment. So true!!!

Spughy, I'm sorry to hear about your mom!! I hope they find out the issue so she can recover quickly. I know tachycardia is usually soemthing you have forever,but I hope it doesn't interfere with her life too much.

Emily - I do agree with the vasectomy thing too! Women are responsible for EVERYTHNING, and it messes with our bodies too much! Oh, and for computing, go to the library! It's free!!

Mel, the Calhoun thing was sort-of a joke. When I lived in New Orleans, one of my friends lived on Calhoun Street, and I always loved the name, and thought that if I ever had to randomly change my last name (I know, I'm a dork) I would choose Calhoun. So I always told Jason that if we had a boy, he'd be named Calhoun, and when I was pregnant with Brynn, we actually called her Calhoun before we found out she was a girl! Now, I've conceded that we don't have to name our son Calhoun, but maybe when we get a dog . . .

Oh, and that reminds me, Gunter, Brynn is totally attached to the name Buxton right now! Jason's aunt bought her a stuffed beaver while we were in Ark (at a state park, so it wasn't totally random) and she named it Buxton, and she definitely thinks the baby should be named Buxton too. So funny!

Well I finally got a good nights sleep last night, so I'm off to make breakfast and have a good birthing day.

[flapjack]

Happy birthing day, Amy! And Happy Birthday, Brynn!!!!
: : :

[Kavita]

My dad's surgery went great and he's recovering. yay! thanks for the good wishes! Not sure whether he's going home or staying in the hospital for a bit--the doctor said he can go but they'll keep him if he feels more comfortable staying. I don't know what he'll decide--when I talked to my mom she hadn't seen him yet.

(In the meantime I've changed all the sheets and washed our pillows and sheets and am catching up all the laundry. One thing about being nervous is that I definitely get the house cleaned up!!!)

Happy Birthday Brynn!! (And happy midwife visit, Amy!)

[Queen of Cups]

Oh, Kavita - I'm soooo glad to hear that your dad is doing fine! I'm the same way - I clean when I'm stressed. Its one aspect of my environment I can always conrol!

We just went and got our Christmas tree! I'm so excited... my parents and sister are coming over in a few minutes and we're decorating the tree and the house tonight. :

[spughy]

I'm glad your dad's ok, Kavita!

My mom was released from hospital today, in the words of my sister "...she has a bit of a different thing than they thought, and shouldn't keel over anytime soon, but needs meds in the short term and further tests in the long term." So, um, reassuring-ish.

I have had a cranky kid all day and am feeling out-of-sorts. Turns out the ILs bought her an advent calendar with chocolates in it. I am *really* not amused by this, because while I've tried really hard to be not an overbearing-control-freak-health-nut and be ok with her having ice cream and/or jello at their place for dinner now and then, chocolate - crap chocolate, at that - several times a week from now until christmas is a bit too much. Because it's not like the ice cream is going to let up at the same time, either, since it's an apparently integral part of their dinners. (Crap ice cream too, I should add, but I am hesitant to not let Rowan partake fully of family dinner.) I need to be more clear with them that cavities are caused by FREQUENT sugar exposure, not necessarily large amounts. One teensy chocolate every day is far more likely to produce tooth decay than a whomping huge chocolate bar once a month, y'know? And it's not like it's part of a meal, either. Argh.

Plus I feel like crap and I think I have some sinus thing going on.

Well that's enough bellyaching from me. Happy Birthday, Brynn!

[MelW]

spughy, I'm glad your mom is out of hospital, and hope that she's doing better soon!

Kavita~ Healing vibes to your dad, too. I still remember the agonizing decision-making near Ella's birth about whether he was going to make it and whether you should go visit him. It's amazing to me that he's generally doing so well.

Jen, thanks for sharing the photos. What a beautiful group of mamas and kids!

Happy belated Birth Day to Amy and Brynn!!

When I left the room at bedtime last night, Neela took off her diaper and threw it on the floor without me noticing. She was dry in the morning, so I guess all is well. We've negotiated peeing before bedtime or wearing a diaper, and I'll put the pad on the futon in an attempt to keep it under her (and somewhat more dry). If she's still needing a night diaper when the new baby comes I'll buy a couple of bigger diapers for her for at night, so my eco-conscience is a little better. Thanks for the advice, everyone!

[Queen of Cups]

Sarah - glad to hear that your mom is out of the hospital. How far away are you? (sorry I don't remember)

Tonight we went to the library because Santa and Mrs. Clause were there. Killian was excited and climbed right onto Santa's lap, Ellie was terrified! After a little while she warmed up to him, though, and actually told him what she wants for Christmas. She and Killy are both asking for marble sets, so I got a HUGE marble track building set off amazon and I'm going to split it between them. That way they'll be able to combine them if they want, and they'll both have plenty to make their own marble tracks if they want to play seperately. Mrs. Clause was so surprised - she said it had been years and years since anyone asked for a marble set!

Oh, and about advent calendars... my in-laws always get them and while I think the chocolate sucks (I only like dark chocolate) I love them because I remember having them as a child. I'm so bad I let the kids eat their piece of chocolate BEFORE breakfast each morning!

We decorated our tree last night! The kids had a great time picking out the tree and watching the tractor haul it back up to the car, and the whole house is so festive and it just smells wonderful in here!

[barcelona]

Jenn and Stacey, it was Such a joy to meet you and your beautiful children!!! (and your sweet husband, Stacey). I am just sorry I did not have more time to hang out and chat...it was such a crazy situation, to be meeting you all for the first time, and also feeling like I know you and your kids so well, and also stressing and nervous about getting on stage soon, etc, etc! Next time, I won't be performing, and we can all just hang while the kids run around. It means so much to me that you guys traveled all that way to Winston to meet up...so special, and Stacey, thank you So much for seeing my play! What an honor and a joy and a treat to have you in the audience.

And Finley and Alex (DH) just loved meeting you all, too, and playing with the kids.

Ahh! Cannot say enough So fun!
And so fun to see the pictures of us. Thanks so much for posting them, Jenn! If I have any good ones from DH's phone, I'll post them, too.


And I am wiped after a long, crazy trip, but will catch up and post more soon. Have a busy weekend ahead with yoga teacher training, but then look forward to really catching my breath, and settling into home and Christmastime! (Jenn, your adorable Christmas tree photo has me inspired!)

December Hugs to you all!

[Gunter]

mel- i would love to hear more about your poem/book. do you have pics to share? what is it about, usually? and, i like to have names in mind but wait until the babe is born. ez didn't have a name for 2 weeks, really. and, buxton was buxton in the womb but we tried out rosa for a while. it didn't stick but is part of her middle name.

susannah- wonder why it's such a high removal rate?

amy- yay for baby owen! the little precious who we all already love! happy birthday to brynn!!! so glad that she was born, that girl!

jenn and hill- i loved meeting you all IRL, finally! we had so much fun playing with the kids. i think our dhs hit it off really well. since we are in va, often, we will have to see you, again soon. and if you are ever in NC, just let us know. that was a really easy day trip for us to make. we'd love to come hang with you all soon! thanks for posting the pics! i haven't even downloaded mine, yet.

i am at a loss for words about barcelona's play. you all have no idea how awe some it is. she shares her life from deep within where few people even have the emotional capacity to go. and, yet, the audience could laugh at how much we all had in common. b/c we're about a year apart, those same songs and experiences were sooo familiar to me. how upbeat she is through all of it is what amazed me the most. my growing up time often feels more like a tragedy but i feel challenged to see the humor in it. i have an awesome life full of really incredible people and enriching experiences. what do i have to complain about? yet, i find stuff all day that gets me down. even yesterday was such a heavy, frustrating day all day even until now when i am up at 5am b/c sleep is not coming easily to my family (including my dog, i forgot his insulin shot and he's peeing all the time!). thank you so much for sharing yourself with us. i wish everyone in our DDC could see it. And, i wish i had somehow convinced you to stay for an encore in my area, too. when you move here to have your next babe at home, i really hope that you'll share your birth story with our community.