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UC Sypport thread - Page 7

post #121 of 234
Oh, Beth! The end of pregnancy can really be a challenge. We all hope to feel great the entire time, but sometime in the 3rd trimester most of us begin to feel all the changes adding up. Your body has been through a lot and there is more to come. It sounds like you are doing just what your body needs you to -- Listening to it! Sounds like you're getting a lot of "slow down" messages. It must be what your body needs. You are a wise woman to heed it's cries. Wishing you peace and relaxation. In a matter of weeks you'll be holding your new babe in your arms and all this will just be a distant memory.

post #122 of 234
Wow Claire!! That is wild! I will be anxious to hear what the U/S shows (if you do decide to have another).

Beth - I can totally relate. I'm due 1/18 and am so uncomfortable I can hardly stand myself. I can hardly walk b/c if I don't have bad cervical pain, then the baby is on a nerve in my thigh. It hurts to roll over b/c it feels like rubber bands are all that is holding my pelvis together. I never felt like this with dd. I have strong contractions every morning, then the baby starts dancing around right when I try to go to bed. I believe in my body 100% but hate that I am so uncomfortable/anxious. I want baby to come when he is ready but then on the other hand, I want him out now! I try to spend most of the day lying down but it is hard with a toddler. So instead I'm trying to just focus on her and our last weeks together , just her and I. She seems to be giving up nursing for good, although she does still latch on for a minute every night. She also pats "nummies" and lays her head on them. It is all very bittersweet for me.

Anyhow, I'm rambling here. Thanks amyamanda for the words of encouragement also. I try to remind myself that I've been waiting 9 months, what is another 2,3,4 weeks??
post #123 of 234
HOLY SPARKLIN! Wow-if you're having twins too, I'll know it's an epidemic. First my girlfriend has twins in November, then I find out I'm having them and now maybe you. It would be so crazy wouldn't it? HOw neat. I can tell you that last week my emotions were so crazy. Trying to figure out the birth, the nursing, the sleeping...all of the craziness. Now I'm feeling so much calmer about it all. Other than my rapidly growing belly which is kind of hard to accept. I'm only 25 weeks, but have the belly of someone 35 weeks. That's hard, but I'm working on being positive. Please trust your intuition. I really felt that it was twins for 2 months before I found out, but kept denying it because certain people thought I was crazy to think that-like my mom! So listen to your voice and see what it tells you. Talk soon!
post #124 of 234
wow! wouldn"t that be wild, Sparklin!! Let us know when you do!

Mamajaza--sounds like your intuition is telling you the answer. ANd yes, I also know how hard the partnership thing can be....DH and I had the hardest year of marriage yet this year...still working on it, but it's hard, no doubt. Sending wisdom vibes your way~*~*~~**~

Amyamanda--thanks for the link. I signed up. I need to get more in birth planning mode. It's coming up so soon now. I think I'm about at the top of my third trimester. I can't believe how it's sneaking up on me!

As for those at the end, I felt the same way last time, w/our first freebirth. It's one of the hardest times of preg. really IMO. I think it's just your body and mind's way of wrapping the whole thing up.....I was miserable and full of doubt last time and then it ended in a wonderful birth. Just letting you know that you are not alone, nor is it necessarily a "bad" thing KWIM? It's the darkest before the dawn.......Happy birthing!!
post #125 of 234
2much2luv--

I'm sorry you are feeling low. Don't lose confidence now, in the home stretch! Part of that feeling may even be because you are getting really close--the hormones and all. Kind of like transition is for some people during birth--that feeling of despair. You might just decide to take it as another sign that your body is gearing up for labor.

I think that a big part of what makes pregnancy beautiful is what we are willing to go through to have our sweet babies. You can do everything as right as possible and still not have things perfect. Our bodies are NOT perfect, any more than we are. Plus, it's a pretty complicated process--odds are that something is going to go differently than how we want, right? It doesn't mean something is wrong.

Another wonderful thing about pregnancy is how many things CAN be "wrong" and everything still turns our RIGHT in the end. It does show what a huge range of normal there is in pregnancy and birth!

I have to tell you, I do not personally enjoy pregnancy for the most part. I have had hyperemesis both times now. This time I have been sicker than the last--I've had 2 completely nausea-free days in this pregnancy--Day 1 and Day 2. I hate it but it is so a part of my life at this point, it hardly rates extra consideration some days. The thing is, is that I know that this is not how it is supposed to be ideally, but that does not make it go away, yk? I have tried everything in the book to prevent/make it go away. I really don't think my body should HAVE to be sick to make a baby, yet here I am. I do trust that my body is doing the best it can. And I KNOW my body makes great babies. So I also just have to trust that there is a reason I experience what I do, and it's not because I've done something "wrong", if you will, neglected my body, ignored my intuition, or had the wrong mindset, or whatever. Maybe someday I'll figure out what my body needs to not be sick while growing a baby. And maybe it'll even be something I can fix! But maybe not, too.

Well, this is supposed to be encouraging, but I don't know if that's how it's coming across. I hope you start feeling better (at least emotionally!). It does sound like what you are experiencing is pretty normal, if that helps. And I agree with some of the others who say, if it feels better to sit down, then, by all means listen to your body and sit down! Think of this time as extra practice listening to your body before labor begins.

I'm not going to comment on Claire's news cause I've already commented elsewhere. Except I will say this--maybe twins would be more likely to come an extra week or two or four early. :LOL Not that I'm suggesting you WANT your baby(ies) to be born too early or anything, but...think of this. If you do have twins it is possible that the EDD they gave you is wrong anyway. All they had to go on was baby's size on the u/s and if there are 2 it seems likely that the one they measured might have been slightly small for dates compared to a singleton. Therefore they might have given you an EARLIER date if they'd known it was 2! Follow that?

For those of you who don't know, Claire and I both have boys born on their daddy's birthdays. We speculated before we even got pregnant about how cool it would be if we had the next ones (girls?) on OUR birthdays. Claire's current EDD is about 4 weeks past her birthdate. Mine, inidentally, is 9 days after my birthday.
post #126 of 234


Thanks so much for the encouraging words. Just what I need to hear.

My youngest dd was born the day after my birthday and this time my technical due date is my birthday. We are going to have a busy January and I know someday my birthday will just get lost in the shuffle. But maybe that will be a good thing when I am 30 or 40. :LOL
post #127 of 234
Birthdays... My first DS was born five days before DH's birthday. This next (fourth) baby is due two weeks after my birthday. I was born 12 days after my mother's birthday. My first two were both born on the sixth of their respective months. I love the coincidences!
post #128 of 234
This first part is X-posted on the March mamas thread:
So, I tried to get that U/S today. But, I was merely reminded why I chose not to go with my general care provider. After a couple hours of waiting, she just called me back. She said that she wouldn't order an U/S without seeing me and measuring me herself. She said that she thought the measurements could be off. When I told her about the midwife palpating my belly and feeling a baby transverse and an additional head in my pelvis, she said that it's nearly impossible to palpate to feel what position a baby is in. Huh?!?! And, then she said that U/S always detect multiples if they are present. They just don't mess up ever. So, it looks like she thinks that probably the MW doesn't know how to measure (after 22 years assisting moms I would think she does, plus I'm huge) or that I have excess water (the MW checked for that and said, No excess water.) or that I have a tumor. Yeah! What fun! Soooo, they couldn't get me in today, but I have an appt on Monday at 11. Then, if I am still measuring big according to her tape, I can go try to get in at the U/S place. Long story short, it'll probably be another week at least until we know what's going on. In the mean time, I'm not sure how I should refer to my belly -- "Hi, baby" or "Hi, babies." I am so glad we decided NOT to say anything to people in real life about this. I think my mom would be driving me crazy by now. It seems like twins to me, but propbability would suggest that it's just one and I'm freakishly large. I'm trying to not commit myself either way.

I keep trying to see how this time waiting might be for the highest good. If it is twins, maybe I'll need this extra time to get used to the idea before it's pronounced to me at an U/S or if it's not maybe I need this so I can relax a bit more about adding to our family?

It's all just a little insane. Feeling my belly, there certainly seems to be extra parts in there. Whoever in there is really active and kicks all over the place at the same time.

Kendall -- soon after I found out I was pregnant, I asked to talk to my baby before I fell asleep. Then, I found myself on a boat, looking at a little girl. She was so amazing. I just took her all in. Then, I talked to her and asked if she was my daughter, she just smiled and said I should go talk to him. She pointed down the boat and there was a boy there. He said he was my son. I talked to him for a while & then told him that I had to get back. He said, "Wait, I want to show you something..." He ran back down the boat where the little girl was sitting. He sat down next to her and they locked arms. Then, they both looked up and me and smiled really mischievously. So, from the beginning of this pregnancy I was thinking that it could be two. Now with measuring so big & feeling so differently, I think twins would make this pregnancy make sense. That's wild about all the twins you have around you.

Tracy -- Yes, the pack we made to have daughters on our birthdays did enter my mind when the posibility of twins came up! Ha! Also, remember, despite not having a PPAF, I said I wanted to come back from my romantic getaway with husband and find out I was pregnant. That IS the way it happened!

2mcuh2love -- That's wild about your January birthdays. You know a thing or two about shared birthdays. I think they can be a blessing or a curse, depending on your outlook. You're right though, you may really love it when you're 48 and people can remember that your last birthday was at 42.

Peace to you all!
post #129 of 234
2much2luv - my dd's birthday is the day after mine also. How funny!

Sparklin - I can't believe they are putting you such rigamorole for the U/S . Usually the OB's seem to be ordering them up by the truckload for most pregnancies. Hopefully you will find out soon.
post #130 of 234
Wow Claire-that dream sounds pretty intuitive. I didn't even have a twin dream until November. MY step-mom started having visions about twins in October and told me that the babies in her visions were born at home and they were fine. How crazy is that? My step-mom had better dreams than me about my babies!

Sorry about the pain to get in for the scan. I wanted to avoid DRs at all cost so luckily I called our natural MD who we'd only seen twice and they had no problem putting the order in for me for the U/S. He even called Christmas Eve to tell me congratulations and to tell me about a super juice I should look into getting! Do you have any natural MDs in your area that you could call? They seem to be so much more understanding in your ability to trust your body than regular MDs. I can't believe what that woman said about not being able to palpate to find the position??????? Do they have a clue?

Maybe there is a greater purpose for waiting. I hope it works out for you and your answer comes soon! Our twin homebirth board may start to grow!
post #131 of 234
Ultrasounds can absolutely be "wrong!" I just read this morning in Ina May's Guide to Childbirth that ultrasounds have diagnosed twins when there was only one baby and vice versa. Mistakes can even be made in amniocentesis, so remember to take u/s testing with plenty of salt.
post #132 of 234
I haven't been measuring myself at all, but thought that maybe I would just for the heck of it. So my question is, how do you go about it? I need step by step instructions ffrom those in the know. TIA.
post #133 of 234
I am starting to think my uterus is kind of big for the number of weeks I am and am wondering where to find what I should be measuring. Anyone have a link to week by week measurements?
post #134 of 234
Fundal height measurements - I asked about this a few months ago. Here is the thread - HTH!

http://mothering.com/discussions/sho...threadid=99987
post #135 of 234
I am curious about how many people planning unassisted birth are also avoiding most of the usual prenatal care. Are there any people here who aren't using any kind of MW or OB for prenatal checkups at all? Sorry if this is an old topic- haven't been here long.
post #136 of 234
Liz - I am not planning on using an OB or midwife at all, except for one thing. We are going to rent a birth tub from my midwife friend, and I may have her just quickly confirm position of baby(ies) and placenta while we're there. We pick up the tub at 36 weeks and I will decide then if I would find it reassuring for her to verify what I imagine I will already know. Otherwise we're not planning on using anyone, unless some extreme situation arises where we feel it's prudent to consult someone with more experience, in which case it would be our midwife friend.
post #137 of 234
Thread Starter 
In the beginning I thought I would be using a mw again. I had a beautiful mw assisted birth the first time and couldn't picture it any other way. When I got pregnant this time I really started having UC fantasies from the very beginning. When I met with my mw I found that she was having some personal issues that seemed to spill over into her professional life. I wasn't as comfortable with her this time. I continued to meet with her for 3 months (three total visits) the whole while thinking that I could do this thing without her. Then finally I decided UC was the way for me. Once I made the decision there was no turning back for me. I felt an amazing relief and a weight seemed to lift. I knew I had made the right decision. Since then I have not had any traditional prenatal care. I don't visit a mw or an OB. I just take really good care of myself and listen to my body. It seems to work for me. There was a point that I was tempted to go have someone palpate my uterus to make sure the baby was in position, but now at 37 weeks I really feel the parts where they need to be on my own. I will be renting a birthing pool from an apprentice mw (making the call today) but she won't be providing any other service. I can't think of anything anyone else needs to do. So, to answer your question, I did have some prenatal care at the beginning but nothing since September and I'm Ok with that.
post #138 of 234
I was seeing a CNM for the first 4 months or so. I got my ultrasound with her and didn't go back after that. In the begining of this pregnancy I was planning to use the lay midwife I used last time. When I called her and told her I was pregnant she reacted really strangly. I felt lots of bad vibes from her so I never went to see her. She called since then and we told her we are having a UC and she said to let her know if we need anything...so anyway, once i had decided on UC I thought I might see the CNM until the end or close to, but I started getting a bad feeling with my appointments so I stopped going. Sometime I wish I had someone to go to now but I am really glad that I am turning into myself and using my own resources to get through these last weeks.
post #139 of 234
I went to a midwife practice at a birth center for two appointments, then stopped going and decided on UC. I haven't seen anyone since and don't feel the need to. I have decided to be guided by my intuition which is quite strong, though I realize that this might sound mighty flaky to many people. Oh well, my birth not theirs.
post #140 of 234
X-posted on March Mamas
My computer died. Oh, what a time for this! I start classes this week & am bumming time at a friend's house trying to reconstruct my lost syllabus. And...giving an update you guys.

This is my update:
Went to the primary care physician this morning. She said that I was only measuring 4-5 weeks ahead according to her tape & technique. She said that it wasn't too far off & didn't think I needed an U/S. Said that the last U/S measured everything perfectly & no need for another. Said that I could come back in 2 weeks to remeasure if the MW kept finding me measuring large.

Soooo, no U/S. Just waiting. I've decided for my own sanity that it's just one. We'll just have to wait and see. I'll try to not remember how wacky she was the first time I went to her to get approval for U/S. She palpated me said I was 16 weeks along and due in May (I would have been pregnant for a total of 11 months if that was the case). She was odd. Anyway, I'm saying one babe until my placenta has arms, legs and a head. Just kidding. It's got to be ONE! For my own sanity at this point.

Hope you guys are doing well. I'm sending love light & peace to all the mamas that are due soon!
Claire
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