2 yr old slapping, not sure what to do

[Hallielynn01]

This is one of my first times on this part of this web forum. i'm at my wits end. My daughter will be 2 in a month, and I'm due around the same time. She has slapped on occassion, which we give her a firm no hit, and make sure she follows up with hugs and kisses and gentle touch. Thats been great untill the last week. All of the sudden, she has started getting, well, she's acting jealous of the dogs. And slapping and pushing them when they get on the couch near us, or near a spot she doesn't want them. They are corgis, so they are tough, but they've always been so good to her. We don't hit them, ever, but she is now. I have to admit we have use physical reprimand with her int he past, a slap on the hand when she won't stop touching even after verbal approach, and even physical removal. And an occasional spank when she seems to get a little wild and not listening. So maybe its our fault she is a bit slap happy, but I'm finding it hard right now, being very pregnant, to control my temper with her, and she's trying us a lot right now. Just the age. DH doesn't know any other way to discipline, and he's taken a lot of his cues from me.

I feel at times i need to be more forceful as we have been with her about shoving the dogs around, but should I just be consistent with the no hit, making her give them a hug or kiss and gentle touch like we've done for us (although she still tries to slap me in the face, i do know now she realizes shes wrong when she does it) I'm just worried that one day she'll hurt the dog enough they'll snap at her. And that's not fair to them.

thanks for any tips, i'm so worn down from being pregnant, and trying to raise her up, I don't like physical discipline, but shes so hard headed. I come from a home that used spanking, but never in an abusive way, and I do feel ( I know most of you won't agree) that it can be used in a way that gets a point across, but at 2 I just don't think she understands the connection of the hit to the action so I'm feeling terrible, and want to do right by her, thanks in advance for any advice or ideas

[Lisanne]

I am going through exactly the same thing with my daughter so I can't wait to read some responses.

[ritz1]

Looking forward to seeing some responses. My 17 mo old is doing the same thing with our dogs. She has actually been bitten by our friends dog (bruiesed her arm, but did not break skin), and although I was around the corner. I am positive that it is because she is too aggressive when touching dogs.

We've never physically disciplined her, but I am prone to use physical discipline with my dogs. We have two shepherd mixes, and they can get roudy. However, as we are observing her behavior, DH and I have agreed that we need to stop forcefully touching the dogs. She is just too much into mimicry right now. And how can we say "gentle" when we are not patterning that behavior for her?!

But, it seems the lesson stuck, and she will slap at the dogs. Of course my greatest concern is reprisal from one of the dogs. I am aware that previously friendly and loving animals have been known to attack children, and I worry that may happen.

DH tries to raise his voice and change his tone, but DD usually thinks he is making a joke out of it. I tell her that we don't hit, please be gentle to the dogs, and then I ask her to touch the dogs gently or give them a hug. (My logic is she can't hug too hard)

Can't wait to hear what people suggest...

[AntoninBeGonin]

It's a phase and it will pass. Seriously. I've already been through it with my son when he was that age, and I'm going through it with my 2 year old daughter. I'm not a psychologist, so I can't give you the psychological reason why our kids go through this seemingly strange stage. But trust me, it does pass and it is normal. Just keep doing what you're doing. Respond to her gently but firmly, letting her know that hitting and other "mean touches" (or whatever wording you use) is not okay. Calm and gentle is the key to two year old discipline. If you start to feel frustrated with her, just remember that she is not doing this to make you angry. It's not about you at all . She's just learning about her world in the only way she knows how--tons and tons of repetition.