How long off to grieve grandfather?

[melissabb]

My kids lost their grandfather lasts Tuesday. Now I realize that since the funeral was just on Monday most PSed kids would have probably been back in school Tuesday or Wednesday. Of course, being HSed we have the luxury of taking as much time as we need.

My question is how much time should that be??

We aren't classic HSers or unschoolers but relaxed HSers who do a bit of work each day. When should I re-introduce some academics?

[ahdoula]

I would take as much time as needed, while also recognizing the kids might "move on" ie not dwell on the situation longer then needed, better by having day to day life look familiar.

[Lillian J]

I don't think it makes much difference how much time you take off from regular studies - it takes virtually no time to "catch up" at some point - but I think Macrina makes a good point about having some normal activities to carry on with (if they feel good). I'd try to turn to activities that are especially engaging and healing at this time, though, rather than things that can be described as "work." In other words, if it's important to you to have daily educational focus, there are wonderful videos, field trips, books, audio tapes, games, etc., that you can turn to - and maybe even ways you can include reminiscence of their grandfather in the process - maybe even some scrap-booking with pictures of him and remembering stories of his life and times...

But even school children won't be in school soon. Since we're coming to the solstice and the shortest days of the year, holidays, etc., this could be a good time to just scrap daily schoolwork and shift to more seasonal focus and warming of the hearth (so to speak), doing crafts based on the season, making special foods, etc.

Lillian

[onlyzombiecat]

I would take at least a week off of academics... or wait until after the holidays at this point. Maybe do some crafts, read some seasonal stories, bake cookies, watch DVD's, and play. After that I would let how the kids are responding guide me.

When sil died last year we had just starting our homeschool year. We probably took a month off at least because our family was still so upset. A lot of that was because dh and I were grieving so hard though. I think I needed the time off more than dd.

[umsami]

I'm sorry for your loss.

I would let your kids guide you. I think it's going to depend on their age (do they even understand death?) and their relationship with their Grandfather.

If it were me, I'd probably take a break until January... and just focus the next few weeks on the holidays and such. Maybe talking about their grandfather or making a memory book about him.

[Marsupialmom]

At this point of the year I most likely would wait until after Xmas.

But we get back to normal as soon as possible. Keeping to a routine can help judge how the kids are truly doing.