Originally Posted by Sadie Lake
But, I've come to realize that part of the amazing thing about birth (especially natural birth) is that the pain is almost like one of those space age transporters of sorts, the medium through which you're transformed from being a maiden into a mother. I wouldn't take away the intensity of the experience even if I could, because I think it was like "walking through the fire" for me. I believe it helped me take more of a "mother bear" type of role as a parent, rather than turn my power over to my doctor (and drugs) and what "they" say and expect someone else to tell me what's right for my kid. Its like, once I went through the experience of giving birth, it struck me so deeply that it unlocked this place buried deep inside, the place of my true mother instinct and intuition. I really don't think I would have woken that part of myself up had I not experienced the intensity of a natural birth.
....And I believe that, because it IS such an intense experience that I felt like if someone weren't spiritually ready for that transformation, it could really rock their world!
Yes, yes, and yes. I guarantee you I would've been a different (and worse) mother than I am if I had gotten an epidural or had a c/s. It's amazing how much I personally NEEDED to go through it to get to the point where I became a "mother." No one ever "gets" it though, I'm glad though that someone does.
(and this is not to say if you didn't go through labor naturally, you're a bad mom, it's just what I personally needed).
-Oh, and yeah, only push with contractions, and you'll know when you need to.
-Also, trust your body until there's reason not to - we don't all fit into that model of laboring women, with distinct phases, an average "length", or whatever. I just about had an unplanned UC b/c my labor just did not "fit" what the midwives had discussed with us. It freaked me out at the time, but in hindsight I should've trusted my body.
-There is a difference between pain and suffering. You can feel and accept pain and work with it to get something done, but suffering gets you no where.
-The last thing is... sometimes you really don't know you're in labor. Everyone always laughs at 1st timers when you ask, "how will I know if I'm in labor?"... well, if you're weird, like me, you won't, but that is ok too, you just have to be flexible, b/c you never know what's coming.