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I need links for a nurse.

post #1 of 30
12/21/08 at 1:03pm
Thread Starter 
I met this nurse and we had some words. She said she want to see links backed up with studies. I am probably wasting my time but i feel so challenged as a mother right now.

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post #2 of 30
12/21/08 at 2:39pm
Can you avoid her? I had a friend who is a nurse. My entire pregnancy, she went on and on that I should get an ultrasound. I continuously expressed my concern about it and she told me studies proved its safety long ago. Funny that no such studies exist. But no matter what I said to her, she knew better because she was told it and the medical community doesn't lie. Now I know trying to prove something to someone with an obvious bias is a monumental waste of time.
post #3 of 30
12/21/08 at 2:43pm
Why would you feel challenged as a mother? It's okay to disagree with a medical professional, even if they seem to think they're infallible.

There are a ton of great links in the archives. Start with this post and work your way through disease by disease.

It's likely you're wasting your time, but you never know--you could plant a seed. If you're up to the challenge it might be worthwhile. Good luck!
post #4 of 30
12/21/08 at 4:15pm
You never know. Many nurses (this one included) are pretty open minded and don't completely endorse everything the medical establishment says.
post #5 of 30
12/21/08 at 4:32pm
I would just tell her you have done the research if she hasn't its not your responsibility to do it for her. You spent time and energy to back up your beliefs. She can do the same. I do have a CYA folder but for people like that I tell them to go look for themselves.
post #6 of 30
12/21/08 at 5:14pm
What in particular does she want studies about? Vaccines? Which one in paticular? There are sooooooooooooo many medical journal acticles you could refer to. Persopnally I think you's be wasting your breath...Been there done that. If you feel you really need to, Id ask her to be more specific.
post #7 of 30
12/21/08 at 8:32pm
Thread Starter 
You are right it is a waste of my time. She was going on and on. Using her degree to back up everything she said. I tried telling her I spoke with mothers IRL with vaccine damaged children and she said its typical for parents to want to blame something. I just feel like my parenting has been attacked. Its my fault for being open. I just dont want to treat it like a dirty secret. If other moms can talk openly about vaxing their kids then why cant i be open too. I actually bawled over it today. I used to be an analytical chemist but yesterday i felt like i was just a housewife. (my DH got mad when i used the phrase "just a housewife" he said i do a lot and i was selling myself short)
post #8 of 30
12/21/08 at 8:49pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lydiah View Post
You are right it is a waste of my time. She was going on and on. Using her degree to back up everything she said. I tried telling her I spoke with mothers IRL with vaccine damaged children and she said its typical for parents to want to blame something.
Yes, how dare parents blame vaccines for causing reactions in their babies?

Quote:
I just feel like my parenting has been attacked. Its my fault for being open. I just dont want to treat it like a dirty secret. If other moms can talk openly about vaxing their kids then why cant i be open too. I actually bawled over it today. I used to be an analytical chemist but yesterday i felt like i was just a housewife. (my DH got mad when i used the phrase "just a housewife" he said i do a lot and i was selling myself short)
, mama. I agree that you should be allowed to talk openly about it--and by all means, keep doing so if you want!--but you have to be prepared to get attacked for having beliefs that go against the mainstream. There is so much pro-vax propaganda out there...if you're open about not vaxing, you will find yourself getting attacked. It's just how it is. But take heart--our numbers are growing.

And if it makes you feel any better, imagine being a healthcare provider who has injected literally thousands of babies with vaccines over the years. Would you be eager to entertain the idea that you had potentially caused untold harm to those children? No way! You'd defend vaccines until you were blue in the face. To admit the enormity of what you'd done would be emotionally devastating. How could you live with yourself? Arguing with most HCP's about vaccines is a COMPLETE waste of time, unfortunately.

Also, your DH is great. I agree that there's no such thing as "just a housewife". You're an intelligent, educated, thinking woman who is entitled to an opinion just like everyone else. Being a housewife is a privilege IMO, not something to be ashamed of.
post #9 of 30
12/21/08 at 8:59pm
Thread Starter 
Thanks Peainthepod.

I wish all of our families could be in the same community. Life would be easier.
post #10 of 30
12/21/08 at 9:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lydiah View Post
I wish all of our families could be in the same community. Life would be easier.
That would be awesome! ::
I would know where to find chicken pox and I could walk down the street nursing DD in the sling without neighborhood boys going 'Ew gross!! What are you doing to your daughter sicko?!'
post #11 of 30
12/22/08 at 12:16am
Thread Starter 
Yeah one day when we are all sick of this $hit we will buy a plot of land and set up a crunchy town.

In my dreams.
post #12 of 30
12/22/08 at 12:45am
Does this nurse work in an office you are going to be frequenting? Because if so- you should NOT feel that your parenting abilities are up to her to scrutinize(sp). You are the momma- and you are very smart. You made a decision for YOUR child- and if this nurse cannot respect that tell the doc that you refuse to see this nurse, and if that's not an option tell this nurse that her comments are not welcome.
post #13 of 30
12/22/08 at 12:48am
Thread Starter 
She was actually DH's friends new GF. SHe saw on a blog of mine that i dont vax and inquired about it. I know she means well but there i just felt like she didnt see me as an educated person.
post #14 of 30
12/22/08 at 12:59am
Oh Lydia, I am so sorry that you are feeling like this. My heart goes out to you and I feel like the same lightning strike has hit us: I am in IL and this afternoon my husband tells that he was listening to NPR today and their discussion on vax. Our daughter will be 2 in Feb and is not. I originally wanted to delay them until 2, but now that I have read more and more about them, I do not want to do them at all.

Well, our daughter got strep pneumonia at 11 mos and had to be hosp and have surgery. The ICU drs told me that the Pneumococcal vax would have helped her. Yada, yada, it didn't change my mind despite the home health care and stay in the ICU.

so...hubby tells me that he appreciates my concern over the vax issue but that there's no way to reconcile this between us (since he wants them and I don't). he brought up the Sears book I made him read and how now that he has, I want him to discredit what a med prof has to say (if it's pro-vax).

the kicker...he tells me this and says that he doesn't know how this isn't going to come across as provocative: that if Anna gets sick like last year, then "the blood is on my hands and he prob won't be able to forgive me." But also that if she's vaxed and has a reaction I will most likely want to divorce him for it. Ugh............my stomach has been in knots since this 'episode' and I am feeling very depressed and suicidal (almost). I am just SO tired of fighting an uphill battle, very similar to what Lydia experienced. I am not a dr but a hs language teacher, but I also have a gut instinct that tells me that vax are a wrong move.

ugh......thanks for listening and my thoughts are with all of those who are experiencing this conflict....
post #15 of 30
12/22/08 at 1:14am
Quote:
Originally Posted by buttercupmama View Post
...I continuously expressed my concern about it and she told me studies proved its safety long ago. Funny that no such studies exist.... .
The studies that express concern about the safety of ultrasound are over thirty years old and one of them were done at Oxford University by Dr. Alice Stewart. The reason the medical community still uses ultrasound is because they have no current replacement. CVS looked like it could be the replacement in the 1980s, but the needle itself is guided by ultrasound. Amniocentisis utilized ultrasound. The doppler is continuous wave ultrasound; the external monitor used during labor is intermittent wave ultrasound. Ultrasound itself replaced prenatal x-ray pelvimetry.

http://www3.interscience.wiley.com/j...TRY=1&SRETRY=0
post #16 of 30
12/22/08 at 1:33am
Thread Starter 
Lisa I am sorry about your DH. I know that awful feeling you must be feeling. I am still exhausted from my episode today.

Has he watched any films with you? Vaccine Nation on google video is a good one to watch together. I watched it with my DH.

There is no vax for strep yet, and the reason why strep is getting more agressive is because we started vaxing for pnemonococcal and meningococcal bacteria. When you restrict one thing another just moves right in.
post #17 of 30
12/22/08 at 1:37am
I have an idea of how you feel, LisaJP. My DH doesn't really agree with me on this either. We really don't agree on anything of the medical nature, honestly. First it was, 'My other kids did fine on formula.' Then it was, 'My other kids used disposables and were fine.' And then, the worst one of all, 'I'm vaccinated, my brothers are, my other kids are. We're all fine.' I feel like I have to defend every single decision I make. So far, he's allowed it, but in the back of mind, I wonder if someday he won't suddenly feel the urge to exercise his difference of opinion.

Luckily, after the pediatrician was hostile towards me, my DH didn't fight with me about the issue anymore. I know it's pushed him a little closer to the fence. It would just be a lot easier if he crossed it.

If it makes you feel better, my unvaccinated cousins had the childhood diseases when we were growing up and they did just fine.
post #18 of 30
12/22/08 at 1:42am
Quote:
Originally Posted by applejuice View Post
The studies that express concern about the safety of ultrasound are over thirty years old...
There are more recent studies, some less than 10 years old.
http://www.aims.org.uk/
post #19 of 30
12/22/08 at 1:46am
Quote:
Originally Posted by buttercupmama View Post
I have an idea of how you feel, LisaJP. My DH doesn't really agree with me on this either. We really don't agree on anything of the medical nature, honestly. First it was, 'My other kids did fine on formula.' Then it was, 'My other kids used disposables and were fine.' And then, the worst one of all, 'I'm vaccinated, my brothers are, my other kids are. We're all fine.' I feel like I have to defend every single decision I make. So far, he's allowed it, but in the back of mind, I wonder if someday he won't suddenly feel the urge to exercise his difference of opinion.
Breast milk is the default. Unvaccinated is the default. Uncircumcised is the default. So many AP parenting decisions are based on going with Nature's default instead of tampering and interfering with normal childhood and mammalian development.

If your DH wants to deviate from the default, the impetus is on him to prove why you should. You don't have to justify NOT tampering with your child. In other words, until he brings you credible, non-biased research that proves vaccines are safe, he doesn't get a say. (Hint: no such research exists.)
post #20 of 30
12/22/08 at 2:04am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lydiah View Post
Yeah one day when we are all sick of this $hit we will buy a plot of land and set up a crunchy town.

In my dreams.
Three cheers for crunchy town!!!:
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Mothering › Mothering Discussion Forums › Health › Vaccinations › I'm Not Vaccinating › I need links for a nurse.