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What did you think/feel when you first saw your newborn? - Page 3

post #41 of 87
I thought how tiny she was compared to her sister and that we must name her Kayleigh since it means 'slender'. Ends up she weighed the exact same 8 lbs 2 oz as her sis , but was almost 2 inches longer lol. After that initial thought, i immediately fell in love and thought how amazing and perfect babies dh and i make and how thankful i was to be a mother. I was also amazed at how ecstatic her birth was, and proud that i'd gotten my homebirth but disappointed in not doing a waterbirth.
post #42 of 87
W/my first it was a really long and rough labor, so when she was finally born I had torn really badly and was in a lot of pain. I remember holding her and crying, everyone thought cause I was so happy to have her, actually it was tears of joy that it was over and she and I both made it alive. I had umpteen hours of back labor and the MD wouldn't let me in the tub, so I was really in agony. When I got to the pushing I had her out in three pushes so I ripped from stem to stern and was hemorrhaging pretty badly. I couldn't hardly sit for well over a month. Anyways I remember when she was a couple hours old and sleeping I was writing in her bb book about the birth, and I went to sign it and started to sign my name. Then I stopped myself and looked at her and said well, I guess I'm your Mom now huh? It was a weird feeling. I mean, I would have killed anyone who tried to hurt her, but I wasn't 'in love' with her right yet. I felt like I had to get to know her, and she had to get to know me, as weird as that sounds. I would hold her and stare at her, she'd stare back at me...literally for HOURS the first few weeks after she was born. It was neat Now we're inseparable!

With my second my very first thought was OMG that is the FURRIEST thing I've ever seen! The first thing I SAID was "OMG she has hair on her BACK...and her EARS...and her LEGS...." Then I (and everyone else) realized she was turning blue and not crying/breathing and they took her away, she had to get intubated because she inhaled fluid on the ride out. So then I felt guilty just saying how hairy she was and I cried Hormones, I'm sure, but MAN she was a hairy baby! She had this DARK BLACK hair all over her ears, back, arms, legs, it was sooooooo funny! It finally went away after about 4 months...but sheesh!

DH stayed with her and I kept thinking what is he doing? Then I realized he was with HER. OUR BABY. And it'd click that I just gave birth. Kinda. It was weird. Once she was pink and breathing ok I got her back and just held her and wouldn't put her down, I kept smelling her and rubbing my lips on her head. I think I 'fell in love' with her faster than I did her older sister, because I wasn't in pain (agony) like I was before.

I think it helped that I knew sometimes it takes a bit to fall in love like you hear about, so I wasn't too worried to NOT have that feeling right away. I mean, I loved them both right away...no one could take them away from me (just ask the night nurses ) but I wasn't gushy over them instantly.

Great Thread!
Bellevuemama
post #43 of 87
With DD1 I was on my knees and the midwife caught her and laid her on the bed. I grabbed her and the only thought in my head was MINEMINEMINE. It was very intense, I think I would have slapped anyone who tried to touch her at that point. Then I thought, oh she is cute! And then I realized that she felt exactly the same outside as she had inside, I'd been feeling her bony bottom (6lbs2oz) and sharp heels for weeks. And I felt like I knew her already.

With DD2 I didn't get to hold her immediately since there was meconium and she had to get checked out by a ped. They gave her back to me a few minutes later and I just thought, Wow she is BIG. She was 2lbs heavier than DD1 and a bit longer. She was so alert and quiet, just looking around. There wasn't quite the same intensity as with DD1 but I did fall in love pretty quick!
post #44 of 87
Total amazement that a baby had been living in me all those months, and that he was now here with me. I was a little bit shocked - I had waited so long for this moment and now it was completely surreal. I remember saying "oh my gosh, oh my gosh" over and over again. It was wonderful. I'm not sure if I would say that I felt love at first sight, but I definitely felt very attached immediately.
post #45 of 87
I'm so glad I found this thread! I'm getting nervous and having silly thoughts about the birth. What if I think my baby is ugly or what if I don't love my baby right away?! I'm so glad to see that not all moms instantly fell in love with their baby!

I was starting to feel like something was wrong with me because I'm not loving being pregnant. My pregnancy is fine and everything but I'm not reveling in it. So I am very relieved that not everyone is filled with this instant over powering love!
post #46 of 87
As soon as he finished slithering out (gawd that feeling was gross) I started shaking & crying & laughing. I was SO relieved it was over! It felt like forever before they handed him to me (it was about 2 minutes) & it made me laugh that he was coughing & sounding like an old man. When I held him & smelled him he just smelled SO good & right. I only got to hold him for a couple minutes & then I had to go get stitched up & DH held him for that hour. When I finally got to really hold him & nurse him I was surprised how much I knew him. It was like I'd been staring into his face my whole life.
post #47 of 87
Thread Starter 
Quote:
With DD1 I was on my knees and the midwife caught her and laid her on the bed. I grabbed her and the only thought in my head was MINEMINEMINE. It was very intense, I think I would have slapped anyone who tried to touch her at that point.
I love it!
Quote:
I was starting to feel like something was wrong with me because I'm not loving being pregnant. My pregnancy is fine and everything but I'm not reveling in it. So I am very relieved that not everyone is filled with this instant over powering love!
Don't worry. I love my daughter to bits, but I didn't really like being pregnant, and definitely didn't like giving birth. The baby and 'The Experience' are different things; you're normal.
post #48 of 87
DS1 Oh, lots of lovely black hair. La la la la, I'm so glad that's over.


DS2 Oh, you're big. I wonder if you're a boy or a girl? Why won't anyone tell me? Am I supposed to have a look and see? La la la la, I'm so glad that's over.
post #49 of 87
dd1 came to me wrapped in a blanket and hat already cleaned up. I thought she looked odd but it was also amazing. I'd never seen a brand new baby though.

ds was a homebirth and I was in love from the beginning but completely overwhelmed.

dd2 was a homebirth and I thought she was gorgeous and looked just like her siblings. I think I said over and over, "I'm so glad you are out." I had very little sleep from labor 3 nights in a row
post #50 of 87
With my DD my first though was my baby girl is here.
After that it was OMG she is not inside me anymore and I didn't let her leave my arms even a second until we left the hospital.
With my DS he came so fast I was in shock. I think my first thought was OMG it's over?! I was scared I wouldn't feel as close to a son as I did my DD, but as soon as I had him in my arms it was pure love. Then how beautiful they were tandem nursing in our bed.
post #51 of 87
I had a c/s and when they lifted her over the curtain...I was just in awe of how beautiful she was and also kind of like "It's you, totally makes sense". I just could never picture what she looked like and then when I saw her it just felt like I knew her and it was "right".
post #52 of 87
Very first moment was shock: it's a baby! And s/he's looking at me!

ETA it was like I was expecting a baby, something for me to look at and love, but then he came out and there was someone there looking at ME. It was such a shock to face the reality of that; I intellectually knew it before, of course, but I thnk that was when I really got it.

First words out of my mouth: "Oh baby! Oh my baby! Oh my Brisen!" Looking back I think it's fascinating that I named him as an object (what he was), then I possessed him as that object, then I named him as a person (who he was). It was all very fast, but I definitely went through that process.

And then I spent months in shock that he was blond. Don't ask me why, both of us were platinum blond as kids, but still. I wasn't expecting it.
post #53 of 87
the first thing I thought and said was

"thank you so much for coming out of my vagina"

everyone in the room thought that was super funny...she was a vbac
post #54 of 87
first thought (after 23 hrs of labor)
He's OUT!!!!!

second thought (and first comment)
did somebody get the time?!

third thought
dang, he's hairy!
post #55 of 87
DS1 - Total relief and exhaustion after 3.5 hours of pushing, and total awe at his cute little squishyness. I said, "I can't wait to do that again!" within minutes of his being placed on my chest, too. And I remember yanking the gown off to get him to my breast, I was so excited to feed him.

DS2 - "Wow, that was fast!" (Ha! Only pushed for 15 minutes.) Then, "WHOA, he looks just like DS1!"

DD - "Holy crap, I just had a baby in my hallway!" then "Oh my gosh, we have a girl!" then "I can't believe I did it. I DID it!"
post #56 of 87
Poppy kicked herslf out so she came a bit quicker then i was expectin i was in shock for a few seconds and i was waiting for dh to pick her up out of the pool. Then i finally realised he wasnt going to so i picked her up, as soon as i looked into her eyes i fell in love : i hated bieng pregnant and didnt really bond during pregnancy : but once i actally held her it finally clicked that it was her in there! (i know big logic leap there ) I put her straight to my breast worrying that i had left it too long! oh no a few seconds! and she latched right on, we just chilled like that for awhile, i kinda forgot anyone else was there, just looking at each other. Then then i started to get after pains, but i wanted to know her sex beforee i handed her over- i was worried about droping her as i was tired an shakey. I had thought she was a boy all throughout pregnancy so when i looked i kept thinking "boy boy boy!" and this little voice in the back of my mind said "thats a vulva, its a girl." but i just couldnt make sense of it until my midwife genly said "shes a girl" I am still in shock over that.

I really did not like pregnancy! i loved giving birth and having a newborn, esspescially those long newbie nursing sessions. But i have decided to have fewer babies because it was so horrible for me. Sorry baby is helping me type
post #57 of 87
Quote:
Originally Posted by MadameXCupcake View Post
Where is the baby?? AHHH!! She is on the floor under me!!!

I gave birth squatting and I thought someone was going to catch her! I kinda looked around for a second then realized she was on the floor[it was like a one-two inch drop] After that I looked down and had a hard time telling the sex because of all the goo everywhere, thank goodness my midwife said hold your baby girl!

A similar thing happened to me....I was on hands and knees sort of leaning over a beanbag on a mat and I also thought someone was there to catch DD, but nope! No one even saw her crown or come out. I didn't even realise she really had come out until I heard my hubby say, "Oh, sh%#" and he and midwife and doula all rushed over. Midwife said, "look down, look down" and I was a bit stunned to be honest. There was a BABY lying there!!! And it had come out through my vagina!!! :

In my mind during pregnancy I was absolutely 100% convinced that I would cry when I delivered my baby this time. She was born via VBAC and I always thought that it would be so emotional, as I am generally quite emotional, and when I visualised her birth it would actually make me cry. But when it finally happened I just kind of looked at the goo and the baby and felt sort of, well, little. I was even a bit nervous to pick her up, like I wouldn't know how. I think I was just a bit overwhelmed and analytical about the birth and what I had just been through. But I did feel more connected to her than I did with my first C-section daughter, both then and in the first couple months.
post #58 of 87
Mine was different for each baby, but I definitely felt a strong maternal bond to them immediately.

With DD1, I was very surprised. I remember just saying "Oh! It's a baby!" like I was expecting puppies or something.

DD2 had a lot of difficulty at birth, and I was heavily drugged. I don't remember feeling anything, even as she was being resuscitated. Her APGAR was 2 and 4, so she had quite a bit of trouble at birth, but I was so drugged, I didn't even care. Once I came out of it, I was angry and felt cheated of our birth experience, and I had a much stronger sense of protection that I had with my other children.

DD3 would not stop crying, I and remember thinking, 'My God, what's wrong with her?' I was also surprised at how big she was, 9lb 10oz. I had guessed she'd be an 8 pounder.

DS was my most amazing, peaceful birth. He was so quiet after his inital cry, and I was just in awe of him. We just stared at each other. I had wondered what it owuld be like to have a boy, after 3 girls. Part of me didn't know how to love a boy. Well that all changed the minute we laid eyes on each other - there's no difference in how you love a boy baby. Now I can't believe I even felt that way.
post #59 of 87
I remember being amazed that she had hair before she was out and we could see her head crowning. I mena I knew she could have hair, but actually seeing her hairy little head coming out of my body, I was just amazed. After that first look in the mirror I didn't take my eyes off her until the mw got in the way to catch her.

I don't remember my thoughts having words right after she was born. Dilating had taken forever and I had been on the verge of considering giving up and consenting to a section so I was gearing myself up for hours and hours of pushing. 30 min into pushing she slid out all in one push. My sister told me later that the mw kind of bobbled her because she came so fast.

I rember before I even saw her the mw saying, "Wow she looks like daddy" and "you want her on your chest right?" I think I nodded, or maybe I just reached for her. I was relived and surprised, mostly relived at first. Then I started looking at her. She was covered in vernix, which I thought was kind of gross, but remembered that you should rub it in because its good for their skin. So I started doing that. I remember wanting a blanket so I could cover her and noticing her little cone head.

Then they took her to do all the stuff, which they did right in the room les than 5 feet from me, but I still wanted her back. I was beign stitched up and kept trying to look through people to see my baby. My sister was great about telling me what they were doing, but I wanted my baby.

I remember being really annoyed with the nurse giving her a bath. She spent forever trying to get all the vernix out of DD's hair. I must have said, "I don't care about the vernix, give her back." or some variation of that 10 times.

When I finally got her back I was so amazed at how alert she was. She looked right at me, met my eyes, and I swear she knew me.

Next time I'm refusing the bath and any thing else they need to do they can do it while I hold her or they can just wait.


The "mama" link in my sig is a pic right after dd was born.
post #60 of 87
I remember feeling such a weird sense of disconnect - like, "how could this whole, perfect, separate individual have come out of my BODY?!"

And I worried because she cried right away and there was meconium and I thought they'd said it would be dangerous for her to cry before being suctioned. But my midwife and the nurse looked so happy that I quickly realized everything must be okay.
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