My ds turned 4 at the end of September. He's a very bright child, so I'm not worried about him hitting developmental stages late. When he was 2, I was the moms sitting around thinking, "Gee, I don't know what everyone complains about - 2's are a breeze." When he turned 3, it was like a slap in the face - suddenly there was CONSTANT testing of limits and power struggles. Those power struggles have slowly gotten better since he turned 4, and even though they are still there, as they are will all children, they are much less frequent and he has a lot more ability to reason and control his temper.
But lately, I'm starting to see things that I expected to see with a 2 year old, that I'm just seeing now. He picked up a handful of salt on the sidewalk the other day, thinking it was snow, and ate it (actually, only a few pellets made it into his mouth). He KNOWS not to pick things up from the ground to eat, and he never did when he was younger. He learned his lesson with that one because it tasted nasty and a little rubbed on his chapped skin which irritated it more. Hooray for nautral consequences.
Well, today, he was using his dry erase marker in his book, and he was very appropriate (I thought) and entertaining himself while I made lunch. I know that if I come and interrupt him when he's working on a skill, that he just abandons it and wants me to do it for him, so I kept my distance and let him be and peeked in every few minutes. After lunch, I sat down with him and noticed scribbles on the aquarium. I was irritated, but when I bent to investigate that, I noticed his scribbles all over the side of the couch. Again, this is something he KNOWS - he's stained his shirts before with markers and understands that they stay only on the book. It took me a long time to even allow markers in the house because I was afraid of this. But he never experimented with crayons when he was younger, so I thought we were safe. And when you're two, I thought you experimented because you didn't know what would happen or you were just getting the hang of using the object. But a FOUR year old - really??? Is this normal?
I'm just so frustrated right now - feeling like we're regressing to stages that should have happened years ago, rather than developing in maturity and responsibility. I know not to take things he does personally, but it feels like it was a completely defiant act and I feel helpless in how to respond - he's obviously not invested in trying to get the stain out.
Anyway, thanks for "listening." I just needed to vent a little. Does it ever get easier?
But lately, I'm starting to see things that I expected to see with a 2 year old, that I'm just seeing now. He picked up a handful of salt on the sidewalk the other day, thinking it was snow, and ate it (actually, only a few pellets made it into his mouth). He KNOWS not to pick things up from the ground to eat, and he never did when he was younger. He learned his lesson with that one because it tasted nasty and a little rubbed on his chapped skin which irritated it more. Hooray for nautral consequences.
Well, today, he was using his dry erase marker in his book, and he was very appropriate (I thought) and entertaining himself while I made lunch. I know that if I come and interrupt him when he's working on a skill, that he just abandons it and wants me to do it for him, so I kept my distance and let him be and peeked in every few minutes. After lunch, I sat down with him and noticed scribbles on the aquarium. I was irritated, but when I bent to investigate that, I noticed his scribbles all over the side of the couch. Again, this is something he KNOWS - he's stained his shirts before with markers and understands that they stay only on the book. It took me a long time to even allow markers in the house because I was afraid of this. But he never experimented with crayons when he was younger, so I thought we were safe. And when you're two, I thought you experimented because you didn't know what would happen or you were just getting the hang of using the object. But a FOUR year old - really??? Is this normal?
I'm just so frustrated right now - feeling like we're regressing to stages that should have happened years ago, rather than developing in maturity and responsibility. I know not to take things he does personally, but it feels like it was a completely defiant act and I feel helpless in how to respond - he's obviously not invested in trying to get the stain out.
Anyway, thanks for "listening." I just needed to vent a little. Does it ever get easier?
Mine did this at that age. I didn't allow my kids to use markers and paint without me there beside them until they were at least school age and even then they had to be at the kitchen table and not allowed to carry them around the house.
