Is your relationship fate or choice? - Page 2

[skreader]

I dunno - maybe both?

I studied Chinese in college because I was interested in the language and culture. I went out w/ guys from different ethnic backgrounds. I didn't have a real "type".

I moved to Asia for work. I met my DH here and decided to stay. So, you could say "circumstances".

But - what led to the circumstances?

It was The Old Man in the Moon. He ties an invisible red string around the ankles of people who will marry. No matter where you are born, you're connected and the string gets shorter and shorter, pulling you together until you meet and marry.

[texmati]

Not sure if I belong here--

I always wanted to marry someone indian... And I was attracted to the fact that DH from india.

Even now-- when he speaks hindi it just melts my butter... mmmm... melted butter.

[texmati]

Originally Posted by skreader

But - what led to the circumstances?

It was The Old Man in the Moon. He ties an invisible red string around the ankles of people who will marry. No matter where you are born, you're connected and the string gets shorter and shorter, pulling you together until you meet and marry.

This is the cutest, sweetest thing I've ever heard. :

[MamaEli]

It was God's Plan.

I just happened to find the perfect study abroad program, just happened to get a full scholarship to do it, just happened to have my housing assignment switched at the last minute, and just happened to live next door to my now DH. We knew almost immediately, were engaged in three months and married nine months after meeting. Here was are 10 years and three kids later.

[Aleo]

Fate.
I never thought I was going to marry someone from France(or Spain as DH puts it), as studying abroad never crossed my mind. We met in a bank(thanks dad!) here in Phoenix. I felt that someone was starting at my while I was in line and there he was lol
My french... oops spaniard sweetheart, long story

[SamanthaJ]

Well, I never really thought I would marry an Asian man although my mother says I had a fascination with Asian babies/dolls as a child. We went to college together and worked together and just kind of hit it off.

[Jannah6]

For DH it was choice, for me it was "fate". I never considered marrying someone of another race.

ETA: We've been together for 8 1/2 years and married for 8 1/2 years. We met in April 2000 and married in June 2000

[Jannah6]

Originally Posted by cappuccinosmom

God's will.

I was envisioning and preparing for marriage with some sunburned, sandy-haired, plaid-shirted Mennonite farmboy, if only I could find one to marry me. Failing that, at least a semi-crunchy, back-to-basics kind of guy.

Instead I happened to meet my dh on a summer stint in Ethiopia. He's African and has *no* interest in farming.

And I'm guessing not sunburned

[ewe+lamb]

Fate, destiny, whatever definitely that for us. I've lived in Italy and Turkey but I never set out to marry someone different I just needed to go somewhere at that time, I had a turkish boyfriend, Italian boyfriends but I don't reckon I set out to marry someone from a different culture just to be different, it was just the way it was. I am Scottish dh is Algerian we met in Italy and lived there for 2 years together before moving to Scotland, and now we live in France, i knew the minute I met him that he was the one and likewise for him, my boss in italy kept telling me - you know he's not even italian - like the only reason I was in Italy was to marry an italian - it wouldn't be to sing or learn the language lol. My parents gave us hell to begin with, saying that I was marrying him for sensationalism well this year we've been married for 14 years and have known each other for 16 years, I can't imagine life without him and we have two wonderful multilingual children and I am so happy in my little family .... but I would love to move back to life in Scotland.

[Alcyone]

We met online through a mutual non-culture-related interest. I'd be uncomfortable using either "choice" or "fate" in describing our relationship, but I definitely wouldn't have been putting out personals specifying where my partner should come from.

[EdnaMarie]

Circumstance. I never planned to marry someone from a different country or religion... it just happened because I was there. I can't imagine putting country of origin or language or religion in a personal ad!

Though, I have always found Caucasian and Mediterranean men handsome- but then, doesn't everybody?

[jul511riv]

G-d alone. Fate, destiny. Whatever.

Was on a program that I changed last minute in Israel. Met a half morracian Israeli (I'm American). Five months later we were married with a baby on the way.

5 years and 2 children later and I've adopted his homeland as ONE of my own.

Still miss the USA, though.

[LilMomma83]

I say both in a way...I never really had a plan what race or ethnicity I would end up with...but, DH looked so flippin' HOTT with his dark Puerto Rican skin LOL!!!! I probably wouldn't have been interested in talking to him had he not first physically attracted me lol.....

[dessismama]

It was a very serendipitous meeting (at a conference) and then we started emailing and chatting over the Internet; he invited me to visit him for a week and... we got together. I never cared what race he is--DH is the most intelligent person I have met, and he is constantly amazing me with his ability to learn new things, to apply new ideas... He is awesome!!

[east carolina]

Bit of both. I met DH in my study abroad year. I was supposed to return to my university and complete my proposal. I was also in a relationship that was very strained by the separation. Once I met my DH, all my plans changed. I stayed and we married about 6 months after we met

[LaffNowCryLater]

I always was attracted to men with darker complexions. I dated all races but did tend to lean more to Af-Am men and that is what DH is

We went to HS together and then didn't see each other for a few years. I had moved to a whole other state and he went off to war in Iraq. We then re-met and he moved out to live with me. We got married and then had a baby.

[Sonnenwende]

I never set out to find a German husband just like he never set out to find an American wife. Neither of us were looking for a relationship period. It was just the way it happened.

[Sohmakun]

My experience was a mixture of both fate and choice.
I went to school in San Francisco and naturally only 7% of the population is AA. Most of the people are Asian and Causasian and a few are Hispanic; therefore, I've dated mostly Asian and CC woman and a few Hispanic ones. But the reason why I also say it was a choice is because from the beginning of my childhood I've always thought girls with straight hair, tan skin and colored eyes were very "pretty".

[mntnmom]

I always assumed I would marry a man from another country. Had lots of Arabic friends, severel crushes on Asian Indian guys. Love Irish accents. So what do i do?

Marry a mostly white guy from a working class family almost like mine, with my same (very different from our families') values. Just they're Catholics from New England, and mine are Southern protestants. But we LIVE in interesting places and are drawn to exotic jobs, and are raising our kids as multi culturally as possible.
So I guess for us it was fate, because I definately never pictured marrying anonother American Anglo!

[veganfox]

For us it was fate for sure.
I never thought I would live outside Greece (my country of origin) or that I would marry someone from another country. But life had different plans. Met hubby online in 2005, took the big step of visiting him for two weeks in Montana (after moths and months of e-mailing and talking on the phone) and that was it! We couldn't imagine living without each other~We've been married for 2 years now and we are expecting our first baby in May.