SO how did you learn? - Page 2

[A&A]

I just went with my gut instinct when I left my son intact.

[Baby Makes 4]

I was 18 when I was pregnant with my first son. My DH (now XH) was 19.

We were at a prenatal visit and my doctor asked if we would like our baby circumcised.
DH said, "No way, I'm not cut and my son won't be either".
Doctor said, "Great, I hate doing them, I wish more parents would leave their sons uncut."

That was the first I had ever heard of circumcision. If my DH had been cut my son probably would have been too. Thank God his mom left him intact in the 70s when even in Canada it was just the thing that was done.

My current-DH was pro-circ until he learned what circumcision really takes away. Now he's pissed it was done to him and thankful that his sons are intact.

[Dahlea]

I just randomly saw something about not circumcising when I was pregnant and I was curious as to why it was such a big deal, so I started looking into it. Now I'm horrified that I almost did that to my son! He is intact and happy and I'm glad I found out about the alternative!

[Fyrestorm]

Originally Posted by Baby Makes 4

We were at a prenatal visit and my doctor asked if we would like our baby circumcised.
DH said, "No way, I'm not cut and my son won't be either".
Doctor said, "Great, I hate doing them, I wish more parents would leave their sons uncut."

Just had to comment on this...This sort of thing P!sses me off more than anything rabid pro circer's come up with..

Doc...if you hate them $o much, $top doing them - $top offering it parents, $top $oliciting it - $tart trying to convince your patient$ not to mutilate their boy$s. Put your $$$ where your mouth i$!

One of the questions we asked when shopping for a ped was if they did this operation. If they said they did, we left the office. There was no way we could work with a dr. that could intentionally hurt chidren.

[Mama Poot]

My first "experience" was with a guy I dated in high school. The relationship never got serious enough for me to see his stuff, but he told me that he was not circumcised and seemed nervous about that, like he thought I would be grossed out or something. I didn't know the difference then, and I told him "Okay..well whatever you are you are. I don't care"

Then I met my DH and that was my first experience with an intact guy. When we got pregnant with our first, we knew that we would not do it, and I started researching and learning about it. Now I tell everyone who is willing to listen and hear the truth.

[tammyswanson]

When I got pg I though I was going to have a girl. I actually hoped it was a girl because even before I knew anything about circ, it made me nervous. Then at the US I found out it was going to be a boy, and sort of wasn' too enthusiastic about it. The technician said that most people want boys, ha ha!

I then asked my MIL about circ in an email (she had 3 boys-all circ'd ) and she just said it was 'cleaner'. That didn't tell me ANYTHING or satisfy my curiosity, so I went online here and found out the truth. Ugh! It repulsed and horrified me that sort of thing is done to babies, so I knew I'd never let anyone do that to my son.

I'm glad I was born a girl, because I know if I had been a boy I would have been cut for sure! My dad had some sort of issue about me having anti circ links in my email signature, but that's probably because of what was done to him as a baby. My mom had 2 girls so she never had to worry about that issue. If they knew how awful and sick circumcision is, they would be happy that I didn't just have it 'done' like everyone else does.

I tell those who are having boys about circ, but so far 2 have not listened. Hopefully my cousin who is pg will have a girl so I won't have to worry about telling her and have her reject the advice or information. It doesn't make me give up however, it just makes me want to spread the word even more.

[phrogger]

I am new to this part of the board, but figured I would just jump right in.

I was 17 when I got pg with my first son and I never actually thought about much of anything in regards to my parenting. I just did what I felt like I wanted to do. My ex was uncut and I figured that was just the thing to do. I wanted my son to look like his dad. My ex however didn't want to leave our son intact so then I had to research and figure out how to support my way of thinking, which really, was just me wanting my kid to look like dad. Once I actually learned what it was all about, I was glad I just felt strongly enough about it. I did laugh though when we were at our child birth classes and there was a debate about circ. and a man said "well to not circ. is dirty, men are dirty if they aren't cut". My ex was actually there with me for a class and boy, I thought I fight was going to break out. My ex actually realized though at that point that he wanted his son to decide for himself. I guess it came down to, we weren't against circ, if the choice was left up to the MAN. If my son (and now my second son) want a circ. I will be perfectly fine with that. I have changed my body in many ways (tattoos etc) and if that is what they want, it is their body, BUT it has to be their choice. I like tattoos but I wouldn't tattoo my baby just because it is what I want.

And I am pg again and this time my now husband is cut. He doesn't have a problem with circ. so this is going to be a hot topic in our home here soon when we find out if i am having a boy or a girl. I hope it is girl to avoid the issue, but at the end of the day, I am more persuasive then my husband and I will win this fight. He and his son might be cut, but my son wont be.

[kblackstone444]

I grew up in a very circ environmant. I circed my son (). Something inside me told me it was wong, but I was young and stupid I thought that was something that was just done, something every baby boy had to have done before they left the hospital. I regretted it immediately, but I didn't realize all the effects of it (pretty much just the unneccesary physical pain) until a couple years ago when I joined MDC "The Case Against Circumcision" caught my eye and I really started reading about it.

[MyBoysBlue]

I knew nothing about circ except that the Jews did it for religious reasons and sometimes it needed to be done if there were problems. Like my brother had when he was 6. (he wasn't retracting, I know that is not a real problem at age 6 but it's what I used to think.).

DH is intact so we left DS1 intact too as obviously problems were rare. Then when I decided to have a UC with my second son I came to MDC. I saw all the Intact slogans in peoples signatures so I was curious and started reading on CAC. Boy am I lucky we live in Canada where we are more likly to find a Intact friendly doctor. No doc has tried to retract either of my boys, and the only advice I was given was to just leave it alone. Now BIL has been asking me questions about his boy who is only 3 and not retractable. I was able to provide info for him. Now I have to start on SIL who dispite being from a family of completely intact men is married to a circed man and in her word she prefers it. I don't know if she intends to circ if she has a boy but I want to start early.

[GoodMomma]

My younger brother is adopted and intact. But I unfortunately didn't even think of him while pregnant. Never looked into the topic at all.....circ'ed out of pure ignorance. When he was about 3 months old I stumbled upon a circ debate board and was shocked that parents actually don't circ. So I was on the board for a few days debating back and forth (ya'll know how it is, lol)....finally I couldn't take it anymore. It really started making me think. So I left the board and didn't return, didn't give the topic any thought until he was about 9 months old. I then looked into it and found the truth and ever since then deeply regretted it. So I know first hand that debates can educate.

[Night_Nurse]

Originally Posted by GoodMomma

My younger brother is adopted and intact. But I unfortunately didn't even think of him while pregnant. Never looked into the topic at all.....circ'ed out of pure ignorance. When he was about 3 months old I stumbled upon a circ debate board and was shocked that parents actually don't circ. So I was on the board for a few days debating back and forth (ya'll know how it is, lol)....finally I couldn't take it anymore. It really started making me think. So I left the board and didn't return, didn't give the topic any thought until he was about 9 months old. I then looked into it and found the truth and ever since then deeply regretted it. So I know first hand that debates can educate.

I think it's awesome that you took time to research it and then changed your mind. I think it would be so lovely if you went back to that debate board and stated that even though you circed your son and was once for circ, that info on that board caused you to investigate and then change your position to one of "against" circ/pro intact.
I think it could be really profound in getting some of the other pro circ moms to look into the other side. It is also encouraging for those intactivist who spend time trying to educate to know what they spend their time doing really can make a difference. I've read from numerous people how frustrating it can be not ever knowing if they're making a difference. It might boost some intactivists morale or something!

[Aleo]

After I circ'd my baby

[Night_Nurse]

Originally Posted by Aleo

After I circ'd my baby

[motherbirth]

Originally Posted by NamastePlatypus

My lil bro was intact but I didn't know. I thought that is how they looked and then when I saw boys in my teens ( all cut) I though they grew into that.

My dad was intact, so I always thought circ'ed penises looked weird, never really gave it much thought as to why. His dad was a doctor and spent his internship doing circumcisions and decided he wouldn't inflict it on his own child.

[QuietTempest]

I learned here on MDC. I had never really given it any thought during my first pregnancy but I found myself visiting this site frequently during 2004 because I had so many questions regarding any/all aspects of pregnancy and birth, but after learning exactly what circumcision entailed and what was lost I promised myself that if I had any sons I wouldn't have them altered. I have to say, though, that after learning so much here I can't look at my significant other's genitals (he's circ'd) without feeling some remorse for his loss. I wasn't sure how he would feel about the circ argument since he's cut, himself, but he agreed with me that our son shouldn't be cut so I've kept my promise.

[GoodMomma]

Originally Posted by Night_Nurse

I think it's awesome that you took time to research it and then changed your mind. I think it would be so lovely if you went back to that debate board and stated that even though you circed your son and was once for circ, that info on that board caused you to investigate and then change your position to one of "against" circ/pro intact.
I think it could be really profound in getting some of the other pro circ moms to look into the other side. It is also encouraging for those intactivist who spend time trying to educate to know what they spend their time doing really can make a difference. I've read from numerous people how frustrating it can be not ever knowing if they're making a difference. It might boost some intactivists morale or something!

Thank you! I did go back to that board and thanked everyone for making me open my eyes and look into it....even though it took a few months. I was a proud member of that board for awhile until it eventually died. I have educated numerous moms on the subject....my sister included....my nephew is intact because of me. I love getting the rare e-mail or message from someone thanking me for making them think and looking into it. I once ran into a mom on a board and her son was about a year old. She told me it was because of me that her son was intact....and I hadn't talked to her since she was pregnant. So it's nice knowing you can change some.

[wholebreath]

Not really sure when I first became aware of this. My mother was always very frank about all things related to genitals and sex, so maybe from her? I have a sense that my brother is intact, but not sure where I get that sense. It would surprise me if my father was, taking into account when and where he was born.
I honestly can't remember which of my sexual partners before my husband were which, I don't think it ever registered with me all that much.
Anyway, when it came time to think about these things when I was pregnant, not circumcising was a pretty easy one for us. My husband is English and intact. Across the pond, if there's no religious reason to do so, you don't circumcise. I also kind of always thought that, if you were born with it, there must be a reason to have it there, so why take it off?

[ancoda]

I am very glad that Oregon Medicaid does not pay for it, because that is what made me give it any thought at all. Every male I had known till then as far as I knew were circed. It was just what you did.
Turns out the main reason my DH is circed is because his dad is not, was not really wanting it done and it was another way for my MIl to annoy my FIL. She was already planning on divorcing him and did several things just to be mean.
So when I asked my DH if there was any reason that he had that we would want to pay out of pocket to have this done. He said there was not. I love my DH so much for this.
Though it still took till I was pregnant with #2 to really relize how horrid of a thing this is and what a wonderful thing it was that we saved #1 from having it done.

[Sharlla]

DR asked if we were going to do it and DH and I decided that it was kind of a dumb thing to do to our kid.

DS1 was born in OR in 1998 but the fact that we would have had to pay wasn't the deciding factor, we wouldn't have done it if it were free.

[njeb]

There were three things that caused me to learn about circ.

The first was when I asked my older brother if he was circ'ed. He said he wasn't, and he was glad he wasn't. That made quite an impression on me.

The second was when I was pregnant with my first. My midwives were very anti-circ. and educated me. So, I ended up with two intact sons. :

The third was when I stumbled across MDC. This is what really made me into an intactivist. Even though I had left my sons whole, I never knew that the foreskin had so many functions! The research just hadn't been done yet. (My sons were born in the 70's and 80's.) I also didn't know the proper care of an intact penis. : My sons survived my ignorance, thank goodness, and they are now grown men.