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January dating thread!!!!

post #1 of 306
Thread Starter 
Hi Everyone!! : I so enjoy keeping up with everyone in these dating threads, it is fun I hope everyone has a WONDERFUL 2009!!! It will be fun to see how things unfold.

Me? I am sailing along with bf, things are great, we are having so much fun lately. No luck yet ttc and that is fine, really. I am at peace with whatever happens. I am still battling worthiness issues when it comes to having someone treat me so well, I sometimes feel I don't deserve it (an old mindset creeping it's way back in) I am staying on top of it for the most part though.

I will be back later with more
post #2 of 306
Kelly, I am so happy for you!!! : Keep that old mindset in check because it is the furthest thing from the truth.

Bf and I are about the hit the 1 year mark in Feb. I swear the relationship is so much better, more fulfilling and hands-down more amazing now than it ever was in the beginning!

I am lovin' and enjoyin' every single minute! :
post #3 of 306
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Holland73 View Post
Kelly, I am so happy for you!!! : Keep that old mindset in check because it is the furthest thing from the truth.

Bf and I are about the hit the 1 year mark in Feb. I swear the relationship is so much better, more fulfilling and hands-down more amazing now than it ever was in the beginning!

I am lovin' and enjoyin' every single minute! :
That's AWESOME May 2009 be even better!!
post #4 of 306
Beloved you deserve all the love and respect your DF (yeah DF) can give to you. Good luck with TTC, it comes in it's own time, so in the mean time enjoy "trying"

Holland congrats on almost a year...!
post #5 of 306
Hi everyone, just wanted to pop in quick and say thanks for all the advice/concerns in last month's dating thread, really appreciate it and I am taking it all in and going to spend some time considering everything, and thinking deeply about what I should do. I have some time to think about it as im not going to be seeing him until the end of next week most likely.

I won't be on for a couple days because im still sick (ughh!), so going to try to rest as much as possible to get better. Hope everyone else is doing well with their guys!
post #6 of 306
I am feeling conflicted about this whole dating idea. I do want someone in my life, but I want him to be in his late 20s (like me) or very early 30s and at that age I am not sure they are ready for the low key lifestyle I have really come to enjoy. I want someone young to help keep me young because I am naturally an old soul, but I also want someone who can enjoy time at home as well.

This fall has been the first time I have even considered dating and I have gone out with two wonderful men and have another one who would like to go out. One of the dates I went out with is too old and while he is nice he is already established and seems to just want to find the right puzzle piece to plug in ---- so he is not the one but I think we will stay distant friends.

The other gentleman I like alot but it feels challenging to even get together with him because every time he asks me out it is to a party or club, which I would not mind once in awhile but all the time.... And he ask me out often the same day which is impossible for me as a solo mama.

To complicate matter I have an incrediably handsome male bestfriend who happens to have the same name as dd's dad so everywhere we go people assume he is dd's dad and that we are a couple. I love him as a friend but recently in seeing how wonderful he is with my dd and how nice and respectful he treats me it gets tempting to cross a line which there is no coming back from.

The idea of dating as a solo mama just feels a bit overwealming so I am at this point retreating to focus on my career and my dd which I hope is the right step. (part of me fears I am running away because it is not "perfect" which I also tend to do --- I am just scared of making a wong decision now that I have a dd involved)
post #7 of 306
LoveOhm...
Well, you know me, I DO believe you can have it all (and Beloved & Holland will both tell you I've been saying that for years!!!)

There is a man who will fit your criteria, someone who is young at heart, mature in nature and has the same values and ideals as you. Ride the wave of life for awhile and trust that he's out there are coming along.

It doesn't seem like you're running, it seems like you're been particular. There is no need to settle. There is someone...probably lots of really amazing someone's out there who will fit what you're looking for and you'll know it and it will be wonderful.

This is one thing in life definitely worth making sure you get what you're wanting...so trust, be patient and have lots of fun with your life and your little one in the meantime.

If you think your friend might be for you...ask for a sign and see what comes to you!

I wish you well!
post #8 of 306
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post #9 of 306
mountain.

I believe love can always find a way.

I'm wishing you some love & peace as you get through this difficult time.
post #10 of 306
Mountain - I wrote a short reply in the december thread. I'm so sorry Doing the custody battle thing myself these days. It's draining and hard. I too hope that love will find a way in the end Sending thoughts your way.

I just wanna add a bit to the discussion of particular or suited or perfect men. I am not perfect - noone is perfect. And I dont think its fair to expect of a man to be perfect either.
For me - I know many "mature" singles who seek and seek for mr perfect, but no man they ever meet can meet the unrealistic demands and so they remain single. I think this little video is funny and quite thought provoking: Smack the pony dating video
post #11 of 306
Quote:
Originally Posted by mountain View Post
Hey mamas I am leaving my dating relationship to fight a custody battle with my abusive alcoholic x. I need all the love & juju I can get...I am so sad I have to leave a man that I deserve & deserves my love
mountain. I am so sorry.

As MCA said, "love can always find a way."
post #12 of 306
Yay BelovedK and Holland! So good to hear about relationships that are going well.

Anne, I think that is a good way to go. Good luck to you and in whatever you decide.

mountain...

Good luck to everyone 2009!!
post #13 of 306
Thread Starter 
Mountain I am sorry you are going through that It doesn't seem fair. I wish you luck with the custody battle and hope it is short and sweet and that your guy will still be there for you after it's over
post #14 of 306
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post #15 of 306
I am enjoying the single life to its fullest these days. I have a guy who seems really interested and a few standers by. I'm just weighing my options and the interested dude is really sweet! He's a single dad of a wonderful little boy and he rescued me when my car stopped last month, so he gets bonus points in my eyes.

But I am not too serious with anyone, just enjoying myself and the conversation. That's it for now.
post #16 of 306
Big hugs to you, Mountain - I have faith that things with your sweetheart will work out after you get things settled with your kids.

And big hugs to all you other dating mamas - I'm checking in on you often!
post #17 of 306
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mmace View Post
Big hugs to you, Mountain - I have faith that things with your sweetheart will work out after you get things settled with your kids.

And big hugs to all you other dating mamas - I'm checking in on you often!
How are you Marissa? Are you in touch with your ex still? sorry if it is a sore subject, you don't have to answer
post #18 of 306
Quote:
How are you Marissa? Are you in touch with your ex still? sorry if it is a sore subject, you don't have to answer
Thank you for asking, my friend! As I mentioned back in the last thread, we started a four day texting/emailing conversation a few days after Thanksgiving, and we easily agreed that we are still completely in love with the other and can't imagine spending the rest of our lives with anyone else. We can't throw that away. We still have to work out the logistics - we need to find a compromise that we can both agree on - but we are very happily back together and very much in love.
post #19 of 306
Quote:
Originally Posted by mmace View Post
Thank you for asking, my friend! As I mentioned back in the last thread, we started a four day texting/emailing conversation a few days after Thanksgiving, and we easily agreed that we are still completely in love with the other and can't imagine spending the rest of our lives with anyone else. We can't throw that away. We still have to work out the logistics - we need to find a compromise that we can both agree on - but we are very happily back together and very much in love.
I had been thinking about how you were doing too Marissa. That's the best news I've read here in a long time (along with Kellie and Steph's recent news). I'm so happy for you!!!
post #20 of 306
Marissa that sounds wonderful I hope you can work out the logistics painlessly so you can be together asap..

I just got off the phone with my guy I looked at the time afterwards - turned out we spoke for 1 hour and 40 minutes We have talked all about our insecurities etc and it still seems we both feel this is something that could turn into a lifetime thing. Amazing as it seems..
There is one thing that bugs me though - he doesnt have much time at all. He is studying a master in business administration on the side of his full time job, and that will take another two years. And he is a career-guy. I doubt he will ever have much more time on his hands than he does now so if I wanna keep seeing him it seems I just have to live with that.. That is kind of hard - especially now where I feel we have way too little time together (though talking on the phone helps a bit)..
Ah well, I actually really respect and like that he is so freakin sharp, and that he is ambitious, so the time-issue is something I gotta eat..
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