The highlighted part, that's definately how I feel. Like Im in a hurry to be with someone long-term, so im willing to over-look things that I wouldn't if I wasn't in a rush.
I'm definately taking on board everything you all are saying, and I'm currently forming a list of things that I need to talk through with him to get his opinion on things before we go any further. -Anything come to mind you think I should discuss with him?
But where do you draw the line? On the one hand we all agree no-one is perfect, so you have to be willing to accept some flaws in a guy, as he accepts yours too. And on the other hand people say "you can do better than that guy" go for someone better. How do you know if a guy is good enough for you or not? At this point in my life, to be honest, I feel lucky to have almost anyone interested in me for a relationship. There's so much baggage that comes along with me, yk? And this guy doesn't even know the half of it yet, so it's possible he'll be the one to end things once we have that talk and I tell him everything (baggage wise).
SeieEnjoy the shopping trip with your guy! That's sweet you didn't even have to suggest he takes you, you just had to say you needed something, and he instantly offered to take you to go get it. aw
I was raped when I was 14 years old. To deal with the trauma I started to smoke a lot of pot and went to too many parties. I got PTSD from the rape. The complex PTSD type which resembles borderline personality disorder a lot. For years I was afraid I was too fucked up emotionally to have kids. Thanks to my strength and will power I managed to solve most of my problems and went on to have a family. I got a married to an abusive guy who seemed to really want to be with me. I felt so relieved that he really wanted to be with me despite my baggage and despite the fact that I was "damaged goods".
Two and half years ago I got a herniated disc in my neck, had surgery which failed, had two more herniated discs and have been on morphine on a daily basis to deal with the pain. Having a physical illness is hard too because it hurts my DP (we have been together for three years) and he have wanted children for a long time. And because of my neck I still haven't finished my master thesis!
But despite my baggage and issues I have everything to offer in a relationship and I'm so happy to have found one that is so good and healthy. It took me 15 years to realize what I will accept and where I'll draw the line. It was hard to learn but in a way it makes me less afraid of loosing my DP - something that I've been very scared of in all of my relationships.
No matter your issues or baggage I'm convinced that you have as much to offer as anyone else. What you offer are basically your heart, your ability to love and care for another human being. If you feel like it you can PM if you want to talk in private. I'd love to help you deal if you think I can.
I need to go now but I'll be back with an answer to your questions about the red flags.