Best way to approach casual aquaintance??

[knucklehead]

I work on weekends and I recently starting working with someone new. We get along well and talk about our kids alot. She is pregnant with her 2nd child and just found out it is a boy. I so want to bring up not circing to her but don't know how to do it. I hated unsolicited advice when I was pregnant and I don't want to offend her. Also, I am so passionate and emotional about circing I'm not sure how to not come across as a nutjob.

If I could just hand her some pamphlets I think it would help but I don't know where to start.

I will kick myself if I let this opportunity go by but I need some advice and guidance.

[Night_Nurse]

Originally Posted by knucklehead

... I hated unsolicited advice when I was pregnant and I don't want to offend her. Also, I am so passionate and emotional about circing I'm not sure how to not come across as a nutjob.

Da da DaDa!!! (It's trumpets playing, in case that doesn't translate well... )

What you typed is exactly what you say to your new friend.

" I sure hated unsolicited advice when I was pregnant. I really hope I won't offend you and I don't want you to think I'm a nutjob but when I was pregnant, I researched everything! I had no idea what all infant circumcision entailed. I had no idea that the AAP didn't recommend it anymore or that it can cause complications. My doctor (or mw) never brought it up while I was pregnant so I like to encourage my pg friends to take the time to research circ before their baby is born. I'm glad I did my research and that's why I left my son intact/will leave any boys intact. Sorry friend, I'll stop the unwanted advice now, it's just something I'm passionate about".

If at that point she asks questions, you can tell her more info. If not, go on and ask her how she's feeling, if she's going to register anywhere, etc. If she doesn't have questions/wants to change the subject, at least you've planted a seed. She'll know she can go to you w/ questions, she'll know leaving the baby intact is an option, and she'll know other parents in her area do in fact have intact boys.
Keep it light and I don't think she'll get offended at all. But I would discuss it pretty soon as opposed to waiting closer to her due date.

Best of luck.

[schreiberwriter]

Yeah! good advice.

I start the conversation by saying: "When I was pregnant with my son, I researched circumcision. I googled it and you wouldn't be believe what I learned. Then I talked to my pediatrician..... And would you believe that more than half of boys aren't these days?......."

When I googled circumcision 4 years ago, there wasn't ANYTHING that was pro-circumcision. Seems to be more balanced now, but the images were hard to get out of my head.

[tammyswanson]

Excellent advice, Night Nurse!

It's best to not start out rabidly anti circ, because most if not all people will either tune you out, or think you are just crazy and tune you out. It's best to try and be sort of low key, and do what NN suggests. It's good to tell how unnecessary it is, how fewer and fewer parents are opting for it (some people like to be in the majority, go figure), and that it's actually dirtier if it's circ'd.

If she sounds interested, maybe even tell her that the reason there are 'problems' with intact boys is because misinformed doctors retract them when they should be left alone.

Good luck!! I hope she listens to you!