January Unitarian Universalist Thread - All Welcome - Page 5

[artgoddess]

Originally Posted by Adele_Mommy

:

In order to put the "Welcoming Congregation" designation on their web site and other communications a UU church has to have voted as a congregation to seek the designation and get special training and stuff. The UU church that doesn't mention it has probably not fulfilled all the UUA requirements to be a "Welcoming Congregation" (capital W) but that does not mean they are not welcoming (little w) to BGLT people. Unitarian Universalism as a faith is BGLT-friendly, as explained on this page.

I think if the congregation that doesn't have the welcoming designation it would be a great idea to email them, or contact their minister and ask why. I would think it would be a push for them to do the work of getting their designation. And I think it's important for all UU churches to do this.

[Adele_Mommy]

Originally Posted by artgoddess

I think if the congregation that doesn't have the welcoming designation it would be a great idea to email them, or contact their minister and ask why. I would think it would be a push for them to do the work of getting their designation. And I think it's important for all UU churches to do this.

Good point.

[rachaelmomma]

Hello all! What a wonderful month January has been so far!

I just had to share what is going on in our fellowship right now.

We have a visiting minister: the Reverend Victoria Weinstein who is on sabbatical from First Parish Norwell Unitarian Universalist Church.

She is an amazing speaker, and the first time I have ever seen an actual UU minister do a service. Wow!

Is there anyone here from First Parish Norwell Unitarian Universalist Church? If so, you guys are very lucky! I wish we had someone that powerful speaking every Sunday!

[katharinerose]

Just wanted to pop my head in and say hi... I've been attending the UU church down the street for about 2 years now, and can't wait to have a kid in RE!

Regarding Welcoming Congregations vs. welcoming congregations, mine doesn't have the official designation, but it is extremely welcoming and vocally supportive of LGBTQ folks.

[LilMamiBella]

Well I attended my first UU church today. It was funny because they were talking about wanting to become an official Welcoming Congregation. They were handing out surveys about GLBT. The questions were stuff like would be uncomfortable to see a gay couple holding hands and would you feel disappointed or something like that if your child were gay. The people at the church were friendly. They spent the whole time mostly talking about GLBT and so I think I will go again to see what a regular service is like. I went alone to the church. I'd like for my Dh and kids to come with me next time. Dh doesn't think we should be going to two different churches. He thinks we should be together at church for the kids. He says I'm wasting my time going to different places of worship, and that I'll never find a church that is 100% the way I want it to be. Which I think is true, there may not be a church that is 100% but I'd like to find something that is as close as it can be to my beliefs.

[~PurityLake~]

Well, we missed last Sunday due to that tree falling on our house. We made it this Sunday and my husband's son was with us, too. He's 11 years old and was able to enjoy the RE class with other kids his age, while Abigail and Sophia again enjoyed the 2-4 year play group.

The speaker today was a woman who spent some time in a south Sudan village providing medical supplies and care with another woman. She showed slides and talked about what they did there. It was all quite inspiring. Many of her stories brought tears to my eyes.

[Mommy StormRaven]

Today was an amazing day at church! Our minister (Cynthia Cain) is one of those that is contributing her sermon to the National Archive for preservation of the inaugeral festivities. She asked for congregational input in the form of a survey and follow contributions from church members. It was AMAZING. We had members that were there for the event both on the mall and in the paid seating as well as stoories from other members that just watched from home. It was a very moving service, some even contributed pictures of what they saw while they were there! Rev. Cynthia Cain of UUCL Blog/homily of 1/25/09 The "Adam" she refers to in the blog/homily is my DH! I'm so proud that she was compelled to use his analogy and words!

Can you tell I love my church and my husband!

On the "me" front you may have seen my post over in the feb 2009 DDC and Adam and Ihave decided that an induction fo labor is the best thing for us to do with this baby. No I'm not overdue but I'm in a lot of pain physically and I'm really just unable to care for myself and my family as it is now. We also simply cannot afford for him to hav eto take even one night off his scheduled work because he would nto be able to make up the time withthe cuts that his employer has made in both employees and hours. He has Wed-Fri this week off so we are hoping for a wednesday morning induction. I never ever thought I would hear/see myself say/type those words... EVER. So any prayers or thoughts you can send my way for everyones best wellbeign would be greatly appreciated...

Thanks and many many blessings!

[Stargirl]

Sending you warm, happy, healthy, birthy vibes!

Please keep us posted!

[Adele_Mommy]

Originally Posted by LilMamiBella

Well I attended my first UU church today. It was funny because they were talking about wanting to become an official Welcoming Congregation. They were handing out surveys about GLBT. The questions were stuff like would be uncomfortable to see a gay couple holding hands and would you feel disappointed or something like that if your child were gay. The people at the church were friendly. They spent the whole time mostly talking about GLBT and so I think I will go again to see what a regular service is like. I went alone to the church. I'd like for my Dh and kids to come with me next time. Dh doesn't think we should be going to two different churches. He thinks we should be together at church for the kids. He says I'm wasting my time going to different places of worship, and that I'll never find a church that is 100% the way I want it to be. Which I think is true, there may not be a church that is 100% but I'd like to find something that is as close as it can be to my beliefs.

I'm sorry your dh is not more supportive of your search. I agree that no church is going to be "perfect", but based on your earlier posts your current church seems to hold some key views that are opposed to yours at a fundamental values level, and that would be a deal-breaker for me. Unless you live in a tiny town (and with 2 local UU churches it doesn't sound like you do) I'm sure you can find a church that is more in line with your values and still works for your dh theologically. It may take some work though. Good luck and don't give up!

[Adele_Mommy]

Originally Posted by ~Purity♥Lake~

Well, we missed last Sunday due to that tree falling on our house. We made it this Sunday and my husband's son was with us, too. He's 11 years old and was able to enjoy the RE class with other kids his age, while Abigail and Sophia again enjoyed the 2-4 year play group.

The speaker today was a woman who spent some time in a south Sudan village providing medical supplies and care with another woman. She showed slides and talked about what they did there. It was all quite inspiring. Many of her stories brought tears to my eyes.

I'm glad you made it to church and it sounds like you had a good experience, but ... :. What an awful thing to happen last week! Your house is inhabitable I hope?

[Adele_Mommy]

Originally Posted by Mommy StormRaven

On the "me" front you may have seen my post over in the feb 2009 DDC and Adam and Ihave decided that an induction fo labor is the best thing for us to do with this baby. No I'm not overdue but I'm in a lot of pain physically and I'm really just unable to care for myself and my family as it is now. We also simply cannot afford for him to hav eto take even one night off his scheduled work because he would nto be able to make up the time withthe cuts that his employer has made in both employees and hours. He has Wed-Fri this week off so we are hoping for a wednesday morning induction. I never ever thought I would hear/see myself say/type those words... EVER. So any prayers or thoughts you can send my way for everyones best wellbeign would be greatly appreciated...

Thanks and many many blessings!

: Good luck and best wishes! I'll be thinking of you.

[Adele_Mommy]

Here is a little info/editorial for those who are involved in choosing RE curricula for kids.

I have posted several times on here that my dd is doing Experiences with the Web of Life this year and really enjoying it. Well, I found out yesterday that the teachers were getting frustrated with this curriculum and have decided to switch to Tapestry of Faith - Moral Tales, the 2nd - 3rd grade program that is currently in beta testing.

I spoke to dd's RE teacher a little and it appears that the main problem with Web of Life is that it focuses so exclusively on the seventh principle and seems to almost ignore all the others. I talked to my dd a little in private and she said "I just go to RE and have fun. I don't care what curriculum we do." They made the switch starting with the 1/18 class and my dd did not seem any more or less happy coming out of RE the last two weeks. Yesterday they started this Gems of Goodness project, which seems rather behaviorist and reward-based to me and kind of turned me off, but that's probably just me being hyper-critical. As long my dd is happy and learning things that are in line with my values then I'm happy.

[~PurityLake~]

Originally Posted by Adele_Mommy

I'm glad you made it to church and it sounds like you had a good experience, but ... :. What an awful thing to happen last week! Your house is inhabitable I hope?

Well, there are still those two branch holes in the outside roofing that is currently covered up with tarps.....

:


There is still that one hole in the hallway floor that I covered up with a throw rug....

[ckmannel]

Hello, just wanted to pop in and say hi. DH, DS, and I are currently without church (still sorta searching for answers in that arena). I do want to raise my son with some spirituality and so I am considering a UU church (DH and I were married with a UU ceremony as that was the only way to have a "semi-religious service" as my ILs called it). I've noticed a lot of posts talk about readings during sermons. What texts are used? And I am not familiar with RE classes, what are they? Would a UU church be a place where my child can learn about all religions but with the consistency of going to the same place of worship each week? That is pretty much what I am looking for. Oh, and I also want to go to a place that teaches tolerance, very heavy on tolerance. We are about to move to the Normal, IL area (currently in Caribbean hell) and I would love recommendations for UU churches. Sorry for the long post, but so glad that this thread exists!

[siobhang]

The texts used range from religious readings (Christian, jewish, Muslim, Hindu, etc), philosophy, quotes by wise people, and poetry. UUs pull inspiration from all of human experience.

RE classes are exactly as you describe - for the preschoolers, we teach more about our core values and being UU (what are the 7 principles, how to be a good friend, how to care for your community, seeing wonder in the natural world, celebrate diversity, etc), but the older classes (1s grade on up) they get into world religions.

Most UU churches have active social justice committees, and working for peace and tolerance are BIG focus areas.

Each church is different - some feel more classically Christian, some more pagan, some more secular humanist (and don't call themselves churches). And within each church, there can be different groups of people who are looking for similar things - at our church, the parents of young kids tend to spend a lot of time together and we are setting up a parents ministry pretty soon because we all need to discuss questions like "how do I explain death to a 4 year old" or "how do I answer questions about God when I am not sure myself?"

Go to the UUA website - http://www.uua.org/aboutus/findcongregation/index.php to find a congregation near where you will be living.

Good luck and I hope you find UU is a good fit for you! Even if it isn't, I think you'll find the folks very encouraging and welcoming for your spiritual journey.

[Adele_Mommy]

Originally Posted by ckmannel

We are about to move to the Normal, IL area (currently in Caribbean hell) and I would love recommendations for UU churches. Sorry for the long post, but so glad that this thread exists!

Sounds like UU might be exactly what you are looking for. The UUA web site has a search function to find congregations. I don't know anything about churches in that area, but here is the web page of the Bloomington-Normal UU church.

to the thread and good luck with your move!

[HeatherRD]

Hi everyone!

I posted a while back and introduced myself, but then I never came back. Sorry! I will need to read this thread on a regular basis, because I really am struggling with issues, and maybe some of you are too?

I just started attending a UU church in September of 2008. DH and I were raised Christian, and while there are some things in Christianity that we really like (such as the person of Jesus and the values that he stood for), there is much that we have rejected (the divinity of Jesus, the Trinity, Hell, etc.). I feel UU is a good fit for me, and yet I am almost mourning the loss of my Christian faith. I just don't know what I believe about God anymore. I don't feel like there is a personal God who cares for me. I was always taught, even if everything in life goes down the drain, God is always there for you. I don't know if that's true anymore, and it's really upsetting to me. I believe in the principles of UU, in the dignity and worth of every person, in respecting everyone's beliefs, of the value of continuing to learn and grow, but I don't know what I believe about the spiritual dimension, and I don't know how to go about fixing that.

DH is really struggling with his beliefs too, and as a former Catholic, it's also really upsetting to him that there seem to be so many ex Catholics at our UU church condemning the faith and saying lots of bad things about Catholicism. Where is the mutual respect there?

Thoughts? Does anyone else think things like this?

[Stargirl]

Hi Heather,

I was very moved by your post. A couple of things come to mind that might be helpful to keep in mind.

1. There are Christian UU's so please don't feel that you have to throw the baby out with the bath water. Maybe you could try to connect with some of the Theists in your congregation to see how their journeys have unfolded.

2. Good point about the "recovering Catholic" syndrome. Perhaps there is someone in the congregation who could kindly and gently remind everyone about the respect issue. In the meantime, it might help DH to try to view their complaints as part of the healing path that they are on.

Wishing you peace and joy as you navigate this new spiritual path.

[HeatherRD]

Originally Posted by Stargirl

Wishing you peace and joy as you navigate this new spiritual path.

Thank you! And thanks for your advice.

DH absolutely hates the term recovering Catholic. It just makes him so mad. He says he never wants to have that label. I guess he probably feels that the Catholic faith is a part of who he is, even if he's now rejected most of the theology itself. I think he feels insulted when people say bad things about Catholicism. But you make a good point about it being part of people's healing. If they feel strongly that they were wronged by the faith in some way, they should be able to express that too.

Mostly we've just been struggling with, how can we know who God is? How do we find out the qualities of God and experience God in our lives? If we've rejected so much of our Christian faith, how do we know any of it is true? Especially when we haven't felt God's presence in our lives. I've teetered on the edge of becoming atheist, but it made me feel lonely and sad. I want to believe in God but I just don't know what to believe.

I definitely want to get more involved in the church so that I can get to know people and find out what their experiences have been. I'm planning to go to the book club meeting next week.

[Adele_Mommy]

I totally agree with Stargirl's post (and she put it beautifully by the way!) that many UUs who came from other religions may still be "healing" and may have feelings of hurt or resentment regarding that religion or even Christianity in general. My minister has mentioned the idea of "religious baggage" in a couple sermons and how most of us have it in some form or another, and we need to be aware of how it affects our reactions to other people's spiritual journeys and our ability to be supportive.

We have lots of former Catholics in my church. The most common thing I hear from them is missing the ritual. My husband is a former Catholic. He is agnostic or transcendentalist now, but he does not attend UU church with me. He says he has no need of church, but what I find interesting is he once added that he does not believe Catholic theology anymore, but if he were going to believe in any church it would be the Catholic Church. He does not believe there is "One True Church", but he says if he did it would be Catholicism.

I think that struggle of defining what we believe is integral to UU even for those of us who come from a background of no religion at all, and probably for lifelong UUs as well. The UUA even offers an RE program for adults on this topic called Building Your Own Theology. This process is definitely hard (not to mention never-ending), but I find it exciting and deeply satisfying as well.

Good luck on your spiritual journey - you appear to be off to an excellent start! Or middle . . . Or whatever . . .