Originally Posted by frontierpsych
I just wonder why people feel the need to ask obvious questions when it comes to this type of thing. Like:
"I'm planning a homebirth."
"but what if you need a c-section?"
obviously the answer would be "then I'll transfer and have a c-section." are they expecting "That's what butcher knives are for!"?
Actually, this is what my DH tells his coworkers!
Really! When they ask about the dangers and "what if's", he just tells them that he keeps a sharp knife ready just in case he needs to do the c/s. (And he can say it with a straight face so they are unsure if he is serious or not!)
As for the comments, well, naturally, it has been a while since I have had them. I have pretty much covered about any and every situation by now. But I have heard them before, both to me and to others.
And the reality is it is true. You cannot possibly know...whatever until you have been there.
But I don't think it is the comments so much as the way they are presented.
Because, I have been known to tell others (on very rare occasions), "you just don't know until you have seven children under your feet all at once" or something similar, but I have never said it in a condecending manner or a "I am better than you way". When I have used the statement it was during conversations with friends or family and it was in a fun, be flexible idea way. Not in a mean way.
My thoughts have changed much over the years, I KNOW. I have used the statement, "If I only knew then what I know now!" way too often. But we learn, we grow, life throws us curve balls.
It does not hurt to have a plan.
I always said I would have all my children at home and you would not get me into a hospital. Everyone told me the old, "you'll change your mind when you go into labor" or some other "you could not possibly know..." stateme. And I did not go into the hospital, at all, ever, until I had my ninth child. I never knew I would give in to a hospital birth. But I also never knew I would get pre-E.
So, really, you could not possibly know until you have BTDT, but, one day you will know whether or not everything you plan will be how you planned it.