Is it safer to have a "fake" bed for you kids? (A CPS type question)

[jrose_lee]

This might be a strange question.

A friend of mine had some sort of CPS called on her family because their baby tipped himself out of the carseat at a store (the store called). They had accidentally forgotten to fasten the buckle. They are a very wonderful family and they don't do anything that would warrant any type of CPS visit. It was all just such a surprise for them.

During the visit (she DID let them in the house), the woman commented that it was a good thing that they weren't sleeping with the baby. And she made especially sure that ALL the kids had their own beds. (My friend does not cosleep). It seemed like their might have been trouble and they would have taken the investigation further if all the kids had not had beds of their own.

So, my question is....is it necessary to have "fake" beds in your home for your children if you cosleep. On the slim chance that some accident could happen or someone who doesn't like you calls the CPS or something?

We are about to move into a one bedroom and will have two children cosleeping (3 year old and newborn). We will have two mattresses pushed up together. I hate to use up space we don't really have for pretend beds for the kids, but I also hate the thought of getting in "trouble" for not if something were to happen. I guess I have this strange fear of someone trying to take my kids away from me....I have heard some stories like this, even from people here on MDC who get called on b/c neighbors/family think they are strange.

Okay- sorry this post got so long! In your opinion....is it a good idea to have beds for your kids even if they don't sleep in them?

[MeadowAndColtsMama]

Well, in your case, since it's a one bedroom, with 2 mattresses I would think that's enough. I mean, I'm sure it's "OK" for 2 kids to share a bed. I mean, you can't exactly fill the room with beds, it wouldn't be safe... fire hazard, and whatnot. I would not worry about it. Also, if you have a pack 'n' play in your house, it could "look" like a bed for babe if you're really concerned.

[mysticmomma]

Well, fire code states 2ppl per bedroom, so I'd be more worried about that. IF I was going to allow a cps visit, I would make sure there was a seperate sleeping area for each person/couple even if it wasn't used since we've seen what an issue that can be.

[milkybean]

I've thought about it but I don't.


I would never go back to that store again, though, and would let them know why. They had an accident and the store called CPS? Why not call an ambulance instead? Oh yes, that's right, b/c if they just called an ambulance, they would likely have to pay for it...better to call CPS instead. :

DS had an accident a bit over a year ago at Target, totally not their fault (not really ours, either, though we should have known better than to let him try on an itchy hat AND gloves that were fastened together (as gloves for sale often are) at the same time. They took care of us, well, me, while I took care of DS, and when I told them to call 911 they did so. Thank goodness they didn't call CPS, him falling like that was scary enough!

[Amylcd]

We have a bedroom set up for each child even though they usually sleep with us. If we were in a one bedroom, I would probably have a pack n play in the house (not set up - you can always say you put it away after your child got up each morning).

[alegna]

Originally Posted by mysticmomma

Well, fire code states 2ppl per bedroom, so I'd be more worried about that. IF I was going to allow a cps visit, I would make sure there was a seperate sleeping area for each person/couple even if it wasn't used since we've seen what an issue that can be.

Whose fire code? This may apply to apartments or rental units in some states, but not across the boards by any means.

-Angela

[alegna]

I vote no. But I wouldn't let them in without a warrant, so worst case I'd still have time to set up if I thought I needed to.

-Angela

[mysticmomma]

Originally Posted by alegna

Whose fire code? This may apply to apartments or rental units in some states, but not across the boards by any means.

-Angela

In my county. All housing not just apartments. It's true in all counties in my state as well.

[StoriesInTheSoil]

I choose to not allow them to scare me into spending extra money/wasting space on things I don't need. I have an Arm's Reach co-sleeper that we use for a few hours most nights so that counts for now but even if we didn't have that... I don't think I'd have fake beds.

I don't ever plan on having CPS called on me (lol I know no one does, that is phrased totally wrong ) and if they are, I will have a lawyer prior to them being allowed in my home. I don't really fear CPS though so

[lolar2]

For the OP specifically-- the second bed that's pushed together would work for the 3-year-old, and a Pack and Play would work for the newborn.

[rmzbm]

We have beds for each child. (Except the baby.) IT has nothing to do with CPS though. I think it's really important for them to have 'em - to have it available should they choose to use it, to have thier own space to read, play, etc. They have always had their rooms set up even though they don't sleep there. That said our 3 girls all sleep with us, and until 9 months ago so did the older 2! And, yeah, fire codes here too dictate no more than 2 per bedroom. I just don't care.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by mysticmomma

In my county. All housing not just apartments. It's true in all counties in my state as well.

Wow, so if you have a 3 bedroom house and 2 parents and 4 kids, you're not legally allowed to have a baby?

Really?

Freaky....

-Angela

[rmzbm]

Originally Posted by alegna

Wow, so if you have a 3 bedroom house and 2 parents and 4 kids, you're not legally allowed to have a baby?

Really?

Freaky....

-Angela

We have a 3 bedroom house and 5 kids. So 7 people. We are in violation, but so is a very large % of the population. Who's gunn'a enforce it, ya know? CPS could I suppose but I don't worry about it.

ETA - We also have a playroom so I suppose we could turn it into a bedroom if anyone made an issue of it. But really, not anything anyone should fret over.

[mysticmomma]

In my county kids don't count until they are 18 months.

[DreamsInDigital]

Each of my children has a bed of some sort (we have a pack n play for the new baby) but we continue to co-sleep with DD and will with the baby as well.

[Ruthla]

I think it's a good idea to have enough beds for all family members for a number of reasons. First of all is the CPS/cover your aspect of it.

Secondly, sometimes kids DO want their own space unexpectedly, and having extra beds for the kids means that, if they decide at 7:45 they want to sleep alone tonight, you can tuck them in at 8:00 in their own bed. (THen of course you can welcome them back into the big bed at 8:30. ) It's nice to keep the options open, and eliminates the risk of a chid co-sleeping who'd really prefer more privacy.

With an infant who would need a crib rather than a bed, the "I want my own space" issue is less likely to come up (but still possible.) But sometimes you just need a safe place to put the baby down for a few minutes. If you've got an appropriate crib set up, you can plop the baby in there when you have to go wash poop out of the 2yo's hair, or deal with the 5yo's possible broken bone from a fall off the furniture, or even to go switch the laundry or pee in peace!

[EviesMom]

When DD was little, we had a pack and play that I really just used for camping trips (place to put her while I helped DH set up the tent) and the like. Could have been set up easily if needed.

I had a bassinette and now a crib for DS. And a bed for DD. Honestly though, before DD used the bed, I set her twin bed up as a daybed. Got plenty of daytime use. And I do use the crib for DS both awake and asleep for short amounts of time. When I didn't use it as a crib, we had one of those changing table rail things, so it was a changing table. It does make me feel a little safer to have beds, honestly.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by rmzbm

We have a 3 bedroom house and 5 kids. So 7 people. We are in violation, but so is a very large % of the population. Who's gunn'a enforce it, ya know? CPS could I suppose but I don't worry about it.

ETA - We also have a playroom so I suppose we could turn it into a bedroom if anyone made an issue of it. But really, not anything anyone should fret over.

Is there documentation somewhere of this law?

I've heard of it for rental units but I can't see how it's a legal law for owned homes.

-Angela

[alegna]

Originally Posted by Ruthla

I think it's a good idea to have enough beds for all family members for a number of reasons. First of all is the CPS/cover your aspect of it.

Secondly, sometimes kids DO want their own space unexpectedly, and having extra beds for the kids means that, if they decide at 7:45 they want to sleep alone tonight, you can tuck them in at 8:00 in their own bed. (THen of course you can welcome them back into the big bed at 8:30. ) It's nice to keep the options open, and eliminates the risk of a chid co-sleeping who'd really prefer more privacy.

With an infant who would need a crib rather than a bed, the "I want my own space" issue is less likely to come up (but still possible.) But sometimes you just need a safe place to put the baby down for a few minutes. If you've got an appropriate crib set up, you can plop the baby in there when you have to go wash poop out of the 2yo's hair, or deal with the 5yo's possible broken bone from a fall off the furniture, or even to go switch the laundry or pee in peace!

Eh, I disagree. We don't have cribs here.

It would be a HUGE waste of time, money and floor space. (and we really have plenty of floor space ) And the cats would sleep in it- so it wouldn't be ready at a moment's notice any way.

We set up dd's room around 18 months.... so the option was available... It was a very expensive, antique cat bed for 2.5yrs. Didn't matter at the time, but if we hadn't had the $$, time or space? Forget it.

-Angela

[mysticmomma]

It's in my county's code as maximum occupancy.