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He said yes! (And I have questions)

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 
We had dinner with our first choice pkd last night to go over any questions/concerns he had and our expectations. He thought it all sounded great and accepted!! : I am so excited. I was SO nervous last night!

We've bumped up our time line a little bit, b/c he may be moving in the fall. So it looks like we will start trying in April or May, instead of August. That is like craaaazy soon. Wow!

Ok, so I have a couple of questions...

If we suspect that I might have fertility issues (PCOS -- but I *am* ovulating regularly), should we think about having his sperm tested right off the bat, so that if we *do* have issues we will KNOW it is me, or should we try the first month or two and then get him tested, if we aren't getting preg.? (Sorry, I know that was a horrid run-on sentence.)

If we should do the sperm count/motility, where do you get that done? Can it be done in a regular gp's office, or are we going to need a reproductive specialist for that?

FWIW -- Not sure if it is relevant to the above questions, but we are planning to attempt an intervention-free, home insemination, at this time.

Also, the legal stuff -- should we do our legal paperwork *now*, before we start TTC, or wait until we are pregnant?

Ok, I think that is it for now. I am so excited!! Thanks for being here!
post #2 of 7
Yay, Courtney!

If he's willing to go ahead and get the semen analysis done, why not? If you're starting in May, you've got oodles of time to fix anything that might be wrong.

My understanding is that he can get his GP to order the SA, and then it's just a matter of dropping the sample off at the lab. Interpreting the SA might be a bit of a challenge, if his doctor isn't up to it, but once you have the results, you can ask the queer TTCers, take it to your OBGYN if you have one, or to a midwife who knows about these things.

I drew up a donor agreement and had my donor sign it before we started inseminating. It's a fairly simple step, but it's not necessarily legally binding, depending on where you live, etc. But, it's one thing out of the way, it gives you an opportunity to talk things over, etc.

What you definitely should start doing now is taking folic acid and whatever supplements you feel you need to try to get a handle on any fertility issues.

I also had a bunch of titres run (required by Canadian law for anonymous donor sperm, but generally not a bad idea) so a preconception appointment with your doctor and/or OB is a good idea.

It's such an exciting time when everything is just getting started! It may feel like you're moving quickly, but don't forget it may take a few months to get pregnant, and then you've got nine months before the baby is actually born, so don't let the speed scare you. (I say this because I was thinking "Am I really ready for this?" and the answer was "Uh, I hope so!" when I moved my TTC timeline up, just as you're doing now. That was two years ago, and I'm definitely beyond ready, but not quite there yet.)
post #3 of 7
Congratulations! We are right now waiting to hear back from our first choice known donor waiting and waiting.
We actually had to ask via email which is akward since he is far away at the moment and I just could not wait for an extra month just to ask.

That is great that he said yes to you guys!
I would say get everything done right at the beginning- legal stuff, semen analysis.
post #4 of 7
I would go ahead and get his swimmers tested. We had ours done at a fertility clinic. That way you have the information so if you do end up taking more time than expected to get knocked up you know what you're working with.

We signed our contract and all saw lawyers before any sperm entered my body. Other people don't even bother with a contract. It depends on what the three of you are comfortable with.

Good luck! I'm always excited for people using a KD. It can be stressful but a really amazing experience as well.
post #5 of 7
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the support and encouragement everyone!

He has his dr. appt. lined up now. I've got an at-home male fertility test, we're going to give that a try, instead of sending him a RE. I'm working on our contract now.

Wow, I cannot believe how excited I am! We're definitely on track for starting in April. It is so soon!!

Thanks for being here.
post #6 of 7
That's awesome, congrats!

I don't know about getting the swimmers tested, but it looks like you've made a decision anyway, so good!

I definitely would get the contract done ASAP. If you became pregnant and he changed his mind about signing the contract, you'd be screwed...so yes, better to do it now.

Good luck with everything!
post #7 of 7
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the input, Raene. I'm working on our contract now.
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