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am i crazy... - Page 2

post #21 of 23
My husband was home for 3 weeks, I think... then I was on my own, except for a week when MIL came to visit a couple months later... It was just me and my 4yo.

The 4yo was way more trouble than the babies...

It's hard but doable.

Of course I wasn't cooking and cleaning and being housewife of the year... but I managed to keep everyone fed and clean while the house fell to pieces... but truthfully it's still kinda that way, LOL. I'll get it clean when they're older...
post #22 of 23
Originally Posted by dividedsky View Post
so maybe the way to go is to get a cleaning person every other week or so?
That's exactly what we did! Our housekeeper started coming when I was about 30 weeks along and we kept her on until the babies were 4 months old. Both grandmothers were pretty much begging to be of help, but like you these are our only children, my one time to have newborns, and I wanted to experience it fully. That said, DS & DD were really easy babies, they napped well and usually at the same time, and neither was very fussy. I'm not sure what I would have done if one or both ended up being more needy.

Like PP have mentioned, it all goes so fast you'll soon find yourself marveling over the fact that you have toddlers and wonder where the time has gone. I often look at their infant photos and try to remember what our days were like back then. I do remember reading a lot (I read the Harry Potter series over their first summer), but that's all over now that they're 19 months!
post #23 of 23
I think I might prearrange a postpartum doula for after hubby goes back to work, but I would hold off on the night nurse to see if you need one or not.

So long as you find a doula that you can make a good connection with, I don't think you can go wrong there. Since her primary goal is focusing on you and the family as a whole (rather than just on the babies), it might be good to have her support for a week or two as you transition to sole caretaker, even if it's just to help get you replenished and a little bit of extra rest during the day, and if necessary to provide extra bfing encouragement and support when you hit the 3 or 4 week 'growth spurt/nursing marathon'.

But if you could only choose one outside helper that family could assist in paying for...yeah, i'd hire a housekeeper/cleaning service to come in once a week for a month, and then every other week after that, particularly if you find someone who will do baby (or everyone's!) laundry.

If your family is just blabbing at you without offering to help pitch in for the cost, then I'd probably just shrug and write it off as yet another aspect of the zOMG You're Doing Everything Wrong or Back In My Day unsolicited and often inane advice that people simply can't help themselves from dispensing.
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