How are the older siblings adjusting?

[KSLaura]

My 3yo is having a hard time. She loves her sister, but seems angry and clingy towards me. She wants to nurse non-stop, wakes in the middle of the night, wants me to hold her and play with her all the time. She was a little clingy before her sister was born, but its gotten so much worse lately. I feel guilty, like I'm not bonding with the baby like I should because I spend all my free time and effort with her.

Anyone else having problems with older siblings? Any suggestions? Hopefully someone will tell me this won't last forever and soon they'll be great friends...

[leavemealone]

My 8.5 year old isn't too thrilled, but she still isn't thrilled about her other brother either. They are about six years apart and I think she was hoping she'd be an only child. My 2 year old is somewhat indifferent to his little brother. He kind of looks at him every now and then, but that's about it.

I do feel bad that I am not able to rock my 2 year old to bed right now due to nursing the baby all the time. However, DH has taken over that job and it seems to be going fine, but I miss my time with my little guy (the two year old). I haven't really ventured out much with the two kids so we have the whole day together and I try to make an effort to spend time with him when the little dude (the baby) is sleeping. My 8 year old is in school most of the day, but I try to make time for her as well.

[Biscuits & Gravy]

To be honest, he is handling everything that is going on much better than I thought. In addition to the new baby he is also dealing with a huge move. H has been in NC since last Monday, and we won't see him until next Friday. Almost all of our things are there with him. The boys and I are living with my mom in the meantime, and have been since 11 days after Keller was born. So between baby, no daddy around, his normal routine being disrupted, and a house full of total crap food, things are pretty jacked up. He has had plenty of rough moments, but he is doing okay. Me on the other hand, well I'm ready to get this show on the road and move!! I love my mom, but I want my house and my stuff. I want my husband. I want to be able to get help without feeling guilty for asking for it. I just want our family to be together, finally. H has barely even seen Keller.

The end is in sight, but this whole ordeal has been a long test of my patience!

[namistenicole]

Biscuits, good luck on your move! And god bless you for taking all that on with a NB!

My son is having a hard time, but today is pretty good. Maybe we're adjusting. Nolan's definitely not a mini-mommy, he's never like dolls or anything of the like. So trying to get him involved or helpful is not working. But... I just keep telling him I love him, love him, love him... and we're getting through it.

I really feel for you moms with younger kids. That must be so hard.

[bmcneal]

Honestly, DD is doing *very* well with DS. I expected her to be jealous, but it's been quite the opposite. She *loves* DS. Always wanting to hug/kiss him, always wanting to hold him, she wants to feed/change him, wants to snuggle with him, read to him. She's always putting a blanket on him when she thinks he's cold, taking it off when she thinks he's hot... She gets mad when either DH or I try and get the milk, because *she* wants to do it. I don't know what I would do if she *was* jealous and upset... I hope the siblings who are upset start feeling better, and know that their mamas *do* love them.

[avivaelona]

Very mixed reaction from my son...not an easy adjustment but there have been a few loving moments which give me hope they'll be friends eventually.

[CAKJNH]

DD1 is loving being a big sister again. DD2 (who is autistic) hasn't even held him yet - he's 17 days old today She will come around in her own time, I guess. She has come over and kissed him a few times on the forehead.

DD3 is the kicker for me, though. She LOVES her baby brother, and she likes that she's the big sister now (like her sisters don't have that "over" her anymore, lol ). But when she gets mad she'll tell me "I'm not changing the baby" or "I'm not a big sister anymore, mommy" to which we reply - "ok but it's not nice to take it out on your brother just because you are angry w/one of us" and she'll feel guilty, go over and kiss DS's forehead LOL. She doesn't really seem jealous of the baby, but she's been included in his care since birth. Something we really didn't do with the older girls as much.

She's the official "diaper duty sister " and only misses the changes we do at night. She's there for EVERY diaper during the day, though. (Hopefully a sign of a good work ethic later on? That is definitely a DELTED gene in the DNA of my family members LOL).

Ok another longer than need be post probably. Can you tell it's just 4 children and myself ALL DAY - 5 DAYS/WEEK?!

[odenata]

My 3 yo DD has been doing really well. She likes to love on DS, and hold him. I think she wishes he could do more, and she does get frustrated that DH and I can't always respond to her right away. She does seem very proud of him and of being a big sister, though.

Last night she told DH she wanted DS to go away now. DH asked her if it was hard sometimes b/c she has to share mommy and daddy. She responded, "No. It's b/c being a big sister is hard. I think I should call Uncle Jake and invite him over and talk about that with him."

[mom2annika]

My 3 y.o. was doing great but I think the party's over, so to speak. DD2 was born three days before Christmas, and all the extended family arrived that day too, so it was one long party for baby, IL's wedding anniversary, Christmas, and New Year's.

Tuesday DD1 told her preschool teacher that she was "very sad" because the baby "was attached to mommy all the time". It's true, but surely this won't last forever? DD1's behavior is regressing...she wants me to dress her, hold her like a baby, etc.

It's GOT to get better...right? Right?

[jrabbit]

DD1 - 9 - insisted while i was pg that she would NEVER change a poopy diaper. Guess who's bullying her way into diaper changes now? even when she has to wipe her bottom??? of course, we all know that newborn poop is different, but it's very cute.

DD2 - almost 5 - wants to smother her with kisses and hugs - she's not being mean, just overly demonstrative. she still comes to bed middle of the night - not sure how we're going to solve that. but for now, it's not a huge problem.

since i've had to be on bedrest, our house is a little different than most - in terms of adjusting. DH has been home the whole time, and I'm a little nervous about how we'll cope when he has to go back. we don't have help or babysitters, so they are getting a little house-crazy. and that leads to fights. but for the most part, i think they're adjusting remarkably well. we need to find help asap - it's going to be awhile before I can take the girls anywhere, even the park. school can wait, but entertainment is a 24 hour a day job.

--janis

[jenniferadurham]

Ashton will be 7 in April, and she is doing ok for the most part. She LOVES her baby brother...even told me tonight that she wished he was her son. AWWW. I have noticed that she is acting out more...attitude is worse, whining more, doesn't listen..but I'm not sure how much that has to do with the new baby or her getting older. We asked her if she was ok with us having 2-3 more children and she got all excited. So I guess she's fine lol.

[Lemon Juice]

We're all good here. The kids loooove our babe and helping w/ her and holding her and just plain watching her interact w/ all of us. So far so good. But at this point adding another ain't a big deal...bring on more babies! (they want to know when number 6 arrives?? b/c we have to buy a limo )

[Phoenix~Mama]

DSD 4.5... I think she is in a combination of happy in loveness and some jealousy... overall I think she is doing well all things considered. She did awesome over the weekend "reading" to her sister and helping getting a new diaper ready. But towards the end of the weekend I think she had enough and started throwing DD's toys. But, like I said, overall I think she did well.

[arahzel]

My DD is 3, and is also regressing. Everything I've read has told me to just be patient and help with what she wants/needs.

So DH and I are spoonfeeding and dressing her, with high hopes that it passes soon!

[Sage_SS]

I'm very surprised that my 9 year old DD isn't more into Lucien. But then again, I guess its not that much of a surprise.
My 7 year old DD is ALL ABOUT Lucien. She is his second mama. She burps him, changes him and carries him everywhere. She is with him right now
My 5 year old DD loves him and play with him alot, but she's disappointed that I'm his mama. lol....

[sarahmagoo]

My big kids have been doing extremely well. I think it's becuase they are a bit older, and since there was already 2 of them, they were used to divided attention.